I don't know how to get over this awful breakup? It hurts so bad?

My now ex-boyfriend & I've been fighting all week. He didn't think we'd be able to stay together because he's going to school thirty minutes away & is staying on campus. He said he couldn't do a long distance relationship because he'd feel bad for being able to see me all the time. He said he wanted to try it, he wanted to fix things, but then the next day he said all this thinking made him not feel the same about me anymore. What? How can you go from being determined to fix something & then say something so hurtful? He said all this thinking is making him depressed. That breaking up is making him depressed. If he's depressed & hurt by this, why would he do it & basically say he doesn't love me anymore? I'm thinking about the amazing memories we had together, & how our relationship was different from any I've had. It was amazing, we understood each other, & were incredibly intimate with each other. How can I recover from this? How is he over this so easily? He sounded so confused and hurt but then was quickly firm in what he wanted. It's been just a few days but I want to be over this, it fucking hurts. I love him so much. I don't ever feel like I'll be ok again. I keep on thinking about everything I could have done to save our relationship. He wanted to talk and say goodbye even though he knew we'd still be done, and I said no, why would we do that if we're still going to remain done? I didn't think talking could change anything. There's no fixing this because he said what he wants, how he didn't feel the same way anymore. I wish he'd talk to me again & make everything better, but I know he won't. I know he's probably already healed. I wish I could just go & find another guy, but you can't find someone because you want to. It just comes to you. It's luck. Will I ever get over this & be the same? Will I find someone else who'll love me like he did?


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What Guys Said 1

  • This is over permanently and completely and you will not reconcile and ride off into the sunset together and live happily ever after nor will you remain friends even if he suggests or agrees to it. People breakup to STOP fighting. If he ever did come sniffing around telling you how you were the only one he ever loved, how he misses you and made a mistake blah blah blah it's so he can use you as a backup plan till he finds someone else

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What Girls Said 2

  • First of all, thirty minutes is nothing! If he thinks thirty minutes is a long distance relationship then that is the WRONG guy for you. Seems like he just wants to have his fun and freedom while away at college, and is weighing his options out. You or freedom... I'd help him choose and say freedom as long as I can move on and be with someone who deserves me.

    Will you find someone else? Don't ask yourself that. You seem like a great person who is worthy of being treated right. True love exists, and sometimes we run into jerks that prove us wrong. One day, you'll look back and wonder why you even went for this guy. So, yes this feeling will go away, you'll get over this. It all starts with loving yourself and knowing your worth.

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  • Sounds like he just doesn't know what he really wants and as hard as it may be you have to try your best and move on... hang out with friends, stay busy with school or work, find some new hobbies. Take the time to figure out yourself and don't worry about the fact that you had great memories or you really cared for him because if he really cared for you he wouldn't hurt you like that. Just know that time heals everything and you have to take the high road and move on with your life! Hope this helps

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