She broke up with me because of her mom?

I don't know how long it will be but PLEASE I'm really hurt and need advice!!! :(

We dated for 1 year and 4 months but it seemed more because we saw each other 4-5 times a week. I'm 24 and she's 22. Everything was going so well!! No big arguments, no jealous outbreaks from either one, etc.

My family is very close and a week ago one of my uncles (the most beloved) got murdered in cold blood. It took a toll on me big time since I knew him since I was a kid and he and my dad were the men I wanted to make proud in my life. She supported me and I guess I wasn't there for her as she was for me. She only has her mom and brothers as family, but they hate her and her mother kicked her out, so she is independent, her dad left them when she was little. So Wednesday she went to see her and her mother told her if she was still in a relationship with me to never go to her house again.

so today she broke up with me because she said that she didn't want to regret losing her mom (she's old) and knowing they weren't ok... her mom doesn't like supposedly because I acted insecure and jealous at the beginning of our relationship but she was my first girlfriend and it only laste like the first month. She also said it was because she felt unappreciated this past week... I told her that I understood but didn't want to break up and offered her time and space to dedicate to her mother but she said there was no future in our relationship? I'm so hurt I didn't expect it and just lost my uncle, my dad lost his well paid job, I don't know how we will be able to pay all our debts... my girlfriend was my strength she was the reason I hadn't given up.

Now I'm just lost and hurt immensely... were her reasons good enough? What can I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly, I don't think her reasons were valid. Yes, I know Family should come first and all but I don't think it's fair to you. When her mom kicked her out, shouldn't she have told her that she didn't like you from the start? Why now, when you two are so deep into the relationship? I feel as though her mother purposely did that. But even so, if she hadn't don't it on purpose your ex had no actual reason to break up with you. If she loved and cared about you as much as you do her, she would've told her mother that she loves you and she won't leave you simply because her mother doesn't approve of you.

    Personally I don't you can or should do anything. First of all, she's the one who made that mistake of leaving you for her mom. She chose someone who kicked her out and hated her, over someone who loves her and wants to care for her.

    All I ask is that you think about it. Wouldn't you rather find someone else who deserved to have you and you deserve to have? Someone who won't hurt you suddenly like she did?

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    • No her mother stated before that she didn't like me, (I don't want to make assumptions but around the time she found out we weren't the owner of one of my family members business's she started acting weird with me) i told my girlfriend that I wanted to talk to her mother and sort things out since as my girlfriend puts it I was the reason of their quarrel because my girlfriend stood up for me. Today she told me I didn't ask her "enough" times I wanted to sort things out? What? Really? If she wanted it too I wouldn't of had to ask repeatedly, but only once! SHe has had a rough life and my need to protect her was even greater because of that... but I see what you mean if she trike loved me she would have fought for us... thank you very much for your time I appreciate it greatly!!! God bless!

    • Ah, I don't mean to make jump to conclusions but, if her finding out your guys weren't the owner of a family business made her act any different to you, she might've been a gold digger? And she's had a rough life, you're not having it so great either. It's rough all around.

      But either way it's fine. No need to thank me. God bless you too.

    • Yeah I'm pretty sure her mother is, i just don't like to judge with out knowing all the facts 100%. Have a nice day/night!

Most Helpful Guy

  • I went though a similiar situation with my ex and my most recent girlfriend, basically she told me (her being the only child) that if it came down to losing her mother or her having to pick bewteen me and her mom that she would choose her mom, and I never asked her to choose with that being said , she being 31 and me being 35 , both adults , i felt that if she really cared about me then she could have told her mom how she felt about me if she reallyy did feel the way she did at all the fact that she never mentioned me to her mom made me question the validation. anyways im drifting off topic basically if she really cares for you then no one should get in the way not even her family after all it's your relationship bewteen you and her not anyone else

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • Basically, your emotions got her mother thinking you are not the one or good for her daughter. She right away did not like you or was not for you. Some parent/s or guardian/s or families are like that even a few friends.

    Because right away you showed something that they don't like. So, she will not like you or hate you or she feels like she can't trust you for her daughter. Yes, it was 1 year and 4 months of you guys being together but if the person you love truly loves you, then she would never give up on you even though you guys broke up. She needs to focus on her family first. Let her do that. Just ask her if ever she knows that she still loves you, then she should contact you or look for you. You can remain the same with her, have feelings for her. But some people move on. But always be a good person to her. Be like a friend for her and her family for right now. Understand her and support her that's what true love does.

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  • Firstly I am so sorry for you lose.

    See, being a lay person I can make out clearly that you are in a mess right now.
    Its about the circumstances you are into which is making you so low and depressed... which is pretty obvious!
    Its not about your girlfriend, She isn't really the reason for your pain. No doubt she is making it tougher for you.
    But look at the other aspect of the whole situation, This is the worst time to let you alone, Your girlfriend isn't giving her best to this relation.
    Rather then being your support, she is walking out of the situation.
    If she genuinely love you , she would have not even thought of walking out.
    Think wisely!
    she is not the right one.
    You deserve better.
    Keep it calm and strong.

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    • Your absoluty correct... specially on the note that she shouldn't have walked out on me in my situation. Honestly if the roles were inverted I would be by her side through storms and anything that came... after reading this I feel the tears I have been throwing have been for a woman that didn't truly love me like I did her... omg this is so hard to comprehend, just two weeks ago everything was awesome and now my world has turned upside down. But with people like you all I do believe I can heal more quickly than just crying my brains out. Thank you thank you!

    • I am glad to help you get through this.
      She is your first girlfriend, that's again a reason for your heart to ache.
      I know you its easier said the done, but please be strong.
      Keep yourself occupied. Learn from the whole situation, shed off your tears and fight back the odds.
      Wait for the right girl to walk in.
      Apparently things will work out.
      Give time some time.
      You'll be fine. Trust me!

    • then*

What Guys Said 1

  • I almost cried reading this.
    Almost.

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    • I don't know if you're being sarcastic, nevertheless, I feel the pain to the core of my bones...

    • No I actually did, it was very sad to read, I'm sorry you had to go through this.

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