My honest philosophy:
I see all these posts about EXes... Why does my ex not like me? This and that about an ex... should we get back together...
An EX means.. in the past. In my life, after any break up, an EX is out of my mind. I move on almost immediately and never think of, try to contact, check up on, etc...
Breakups happen for a reason...
I'm not talking about someone who moved away... I'm talking about relationships that ended due to cheating, abuse, incompatibility and such...
Who CARES about an EX? Who cares about what an EX thinks of them?
Then "breaks"... what's that all about? all this is is an admission you can't commit in a relationship. Taking a vacation from a relationship isn't going to fly.
ALSO... getting back together after a breakup.. or chasing someone to get back together... sorry folks, the same issues are gonna be there.
This "closure" What's that about? No such thing... So what? It's over.. there is your closure.
Move on... where you found one guy/gal, there will always be more.
You need to realise that every relationship is affected by choices. If they chose to leave you once there must have been some thought behind it, and there's no guarantee that he won't leave you again. Most relationships are about compatibility and the determination to hold on when you don't think you can. Instead of hoping for them to come back. Work on yourself pick up a new hobby. Travel. Soon enough you may end up meeting someone else who will make you think "Why was I ever with him?". Keep faith and move on. Life has a lot more ahead than you are holding on to.
By asking yourself, how do I love myself enough to know that I am worthy and capable of finding a man better than the one I can't seem to let go?
A man who sticks by my side for better or worse and helps me help this relationship progress and grow. Once you figure out that answer, break ups will feel like a lesson learned rather than a heart break.
If you are wondering about a man and when he might be coming back or if he is ever going to come back, you have lost control in yourself as a woman and allowed yourself to become emotionally and mentally dependent on someone else rather than yourself.
During this time, work on you. Help strengthen your weaknesses and accept that things and people in life aren't forever. We are taken from each other every day and that's not in our control.
When you think a man is the reason for your security, sanity, and happiness, that's when you'll feel like you lost yourself.
I think it's more you have to have the mindset you don't want them to come back. Trust me, having been through it, you broke up for a reason. Clearly something wasn't working. As soon as you start to look at it positively I. e. Look at what I learnt from this experience, I'm much better off after the fact, that's when you'll start to move on.
I spent a year chasing my ex only to realise how much of a dick he was and how much I change do to try and suit him. I was scared of being alone, but slowly and surely started to see things that, 'in the moment' I didn't see before. I realised I was a Better person than that. Get yourself back on the bandwagon and you'll be fine. Go on tinder, it's always a bit of fun haha... you never know who you'll meet!
It took me a few years to realize he wasn't coming back. But now I'm thankful he didn't. He's not good in relationships. He's a good friend and father, but that's it.
I'm sorry if you're having a hard time. My divorce was the single most difficult thing I've ever been through. I was raising my daughter who at the time was 8 months old. Over the period of the next year, although I took care of her, I do not remember that time. I have pictures I took that don't even jog my memory. That is the only thing that still makes me mad and sad 9 years later. So much lost time with my daughter.
Hang in there. It will get better.
Opinion
8Opinion
I have been in a 8 year relationship and months ago we broke up. It didn't hit me till the 3rd day. I was devastated. even thot about ending my life. I forgot how how to live. 2 months passed by.. i still wasn't able to stand on my own. My ex completely cut off all ties with me. Which killed me even more. Finally after 85 days, i stared talking to someone (mainly to forget my ex).. something magical happened, this person was so similar to my ex that he was able to make me forget him. But i found out this isn't loving him but my excuse to find my ex in someone else. So slowly i forced myself to know this guy better and like him for who he is.
I was in this situation in the past. I can understand the pain of not enjoying life and just getting through each day until you think he'll come back. The only way I finally came to the realisation that he wasn't coming back was by asking him out straight, did he ever see a future where we'd be together again and he said no. The pain is very difficult, it will feel like the initial break up again for a bit but after that it really does get better and a new wonderful happy life will begin. Never let a guy tell you he doesn't want you more than once. Be strong girl 💪❤️
I had this, I just couldn't get over him. But I did. I discovered this site named postmalesyndrom and it really helped me. I will leave some articles of her below and I hope it helps you too.
postmalesyndrome.com/.../
postmalesyndrome.com/.../
postmalesyndrome.com/.../
Omg I did the same thing as you a year ago! I even subscribed to a daily email on how to get your ex back. Nothing works, like what you said.
I suggest you go out with friends. Lots of friends. You'll slowly forget him and hopefully (I'm sure you will!) find someone better :)
What I do after a break up is cut off all ties completely. I delete his number and erase him from all mu social media. You can also make a couple of exciting changes to your life, doesn't have to be anything crazy. You can always talk to new people to get him out of your mind.
I've been in that denial phase for a year. I did everything, become friends with him again and eventually try to rebuild what was broken.
But what woke me up was when he actually showed signs of interest to my best friend while knowing I still liked him. I realized that it was a losing battle and I have to give up for myself.
Sometimes you just have to see how happy he is with someone else because he wouldn't be that way with you again :(
Get a rebound-fwb! It's okay as long as your rebound doesn't expect more from you and if you don't accidentally fall in love with him.
What also works a little: tell your girlfriends everything about him that you can't stand. Research has shown that talking positively about a crush with friends increases the amount of feelings you have for that crush. Convincingly doing the opposite may help reducing feelings instead.
Hi, so it sounds like you have tried to get him back? who initiated the break up? how long ago? has he given any little signs he may come back? What would you say is the most hurtful thing he has done to you? xx
Realize wasting your energy on this person is like sending shit into a black hole and you need to send that energy elsewhere to find someone else you can ACTUALLY be with. You're just passing up actual chances by wasting your energy on your ex.
The question is, why do you want him back? Everything happens for a reason, best to move on to someone more deserving!
try and indulge in some activities. Hiking, etc. More importantly, try to get some pet. It helps a lot.
look everyone have a different opinion. but at the end you are the one taking decision. and let me tell you one thing that whatever you choose to do just dont gone regret it. thats the key for happiness
Date other men and find another crush or lover, simple really :-)
simple it is...
accept the fact he is gone and he did it knowingly.
and you deserve a better life..
i can help you more if you want to talk.. reply
It will only take time. How much time? I don't know.
In my experience, fuck his best friend. Breaks all emotional ties. But that's just me. Good luck.
You don't "convince" yourself you accept the fact that your ass isn't wanted.
Keep calm and move on... He ll come back for sure
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