How do I tell my boyfriend I cheated and pregnant with another man?

Question

Please don't judge me I have already called myself every name under the sun already.

Me (17) and my boyfriend (21) of two years have started trying for a baby. I have been off birth control for around a year now and he normally pulls out but there has been many times that he hasn't and I haven't got pregnant. anyway now we are trying properly. He didn't pull out on the 18th, 19th, 21st or 22nd. But on the 20th I slept with one of my best friends. I regret it so much, we went out to town and he had forgotten his card so I said I would go back to his to get it with him, when we were at his he kissed me and I just went with it. His penis went inside me for a few seconds before he stopped and put a condom on. I have never done anything like this before, not even thought about it, I had been drinking and my head was not in the right place. Now I'm freaking out I will be pregnant and it could be my friends from any pre *** . He is black so it's going to be obvious that it's his if I am pregnant. What are the chances it would be his if I am

Pregnant? I regret this so much, I want to tell him but I love him

So much and can't stand the though of losing him

diabloknk · Accepted Answer

Be honest, contrite, and sincere, and make sure you beg his forgiveness. That's your best option. I'm not saying it will work. Your actions are completely inexcusable, so you're going to throw yourself at his mercy.

Do not argue, or try to defend your actions in any way. That will all but guarantee that he will dump you. Really, your only option is to beg for forgiveness- and beg hard.

Also, don't expect things to go back to the way they were. You betrayed his trust in an extremely callous manner - the process of getting it back won't be easy or quick.

Also, the boyfriend is unlikely to want to have anything to do with your baby or you if it's not his.

With all said and done...don't expect forgiveness. All you've got is hope. You f***ed up big - and you reap what you sow. "Drinking a little too much" does nothing to excuse it.

samy26 · Accepted Answer

well.I do not know what to say to you.what you did was very silly and you did not have to do it. you say you do not want to lose your boyfriend now but were you thinking about himwhen you did all that? Your male friend will surely be feeling a lot of hurt now you have to deal with the consequences of your actions which you cannot aviod.I do not mean to judge or ridicule you but why do you females carry yourselves silly like that that and throw yourselves at the guys like that.We males can never love or marry a female who has not respect for the poor way a female will carry herself. And to think of it.You are left solo to take care of that baby on your own without support form either male companion because I has got from you what he wanted so you are of no use to him. Oh boy what a mess MeikaWong.I do not know what to say.

Shea25 · Accepted Answer

really the chances is 50 50 for both guys as it only takes 1 time, 1 second to get pregnant. being that you and your boyfriend have been trying for a while I expect it to be for him but you can try to calculate the exact moment you got pregnant.

once you are certain or almost certain its for your fren, then you hv to come clean, because if you wait till after the baby is born your boyfriend may neva forgive u. I don't know how you would tell him but you need to emphasize that you love him, it was a poor lapse of judgement, it won't happen again, you feel horrible that you silly actions cause him so much pain, and ask what you can do to make it up to him. there is no easy way to do this esp. like how you were trying to hv a baby.

kimmiec333 · Accepted Answer

I'm not trying to be judgmental here, but why would you want to put you life on hold at 17 to raise a baby when your at the best part of your life? Its not just somthing that you can undo when you want to go out with friends. you'll have to take care of the baby, give it a good life and all. your 17, you need to worry about you first, get your life set up and stable before bringing a baby into the world. as far as telling your boyfriend about it...well that's gonna be tough. the chances are probley slim that the baby is the other guys though, since he used a condom for one time. and your boyfriend didn't for like 4 times.

beerY33 · Accepted Answer

1. You should not be trying to have a baby.

2. "Pulling out" is not a method of contraception.

3. You need to tell your boyfriend that you cheated, regardless of whether you're pregnant or it's his or whatever.

4. It's impossible to tell who's it is considering you had sex with two guys in two days. Without a paternity test or waiting to see the baby, you're just not going to be able to tell.

5. You should get a pregnancy test before concluding that you're pregnant.

6. JUST USE A CONDOM. PLEASE.

BuchitaBuchys · Answer

Terrible, girl just terrible. I don't care about promiscuous people, but cheaters are the lowest of the low and piss me the fuck off. But I'll be civil.
LEAVE THE POOR MAN. Tell him your horrible mistake, and just leave him alone. I cannot believe a person who "loves" someone would do such a low class thing, especially with his friend? I have no respectful words for you, but just leave him. Terrible. Just plain fucking terrible. I feel so bad for him.
Good luck and I hope you learn your mistakes.

P. S. Bullshit blaming it on alcohol. You obviously had lustful feelings for his friend before the alcohol. This ain't a T-Pain song, don't even try to blame it on the alcohol. -_-

Jdjfjcjj · Answer

you friends with some guy you

you go out of town with him without your boyfriend

you introduce alcohol into the equation,

he kisses you and you let it happen

He's an example of what men say that majority of men "friends" are attracted and given the chance want to hookup

You have u protected sex, knowing you aren't on pill. I get you say you drunk, but if you that drunk, now we talking a whole diff issue

You didn't take plan B

And still haven't told boyfriend.

Every decision you made is wrong. You probably a headache regardless of all this

sikoo31 · Answer

you just went with it?

you make it very hard for me not to judge you, but I'll try.

you do need to tell him, be completely honest.

if he doesn't want to talk to you for a few days, you have to give him time, you must understand that this will come as, most likely, the biggest shock in his life.

give him space and time if he wants it, if he doesn't, then talk it out as best you can.

i hope you are forgiven and that you never do anything like that again.

btw, he's not your real friend if he would take advantage of you that way. I hope you don't get angry when your boyfriend puts him in a coma.

Anonymous · Answer

you need to realize how young you are... you've turned your boyfriend into a rapist and decided that you two should have a baby together? Where is the logic in that? I can tell you right now that the  most growing up that I did was between the ages of 17 and 23...I have changed a ton! I'm not even the same person. When you are 23 you're gonna think "fu** that was stupid... I never got to live my own life!" The only life you've lived is called childhood, and that's not life... that is preparation for life...you never got a chance to live for you, to find out who you even are! :(

PhoebeCaulfield · Answer

You clearly had and do have a "subconscious desire" to have a baby with a Negro male. You WANT a little "Bronze Trophy" to display in public, like many of the Hollywood actresses who LOVE their little niglets and flaunt them in photos.

in 2014, White women do not want White babies anymore. White women in the USA from 15 to 35 perceive having a Black Baby as a "Status Symbol". The American culture has PERMANENTLY CHANGED. Whites are doomed to extinction.

The problem is that most Black men LEAVE the White women in a year or two (with more than a few "beatings" thrown into the mix -- Black men cannot resist beating their women). Then - the White women are "stuck" being single mothers with an Interracial Black baby.

NO White men will ever date a White woman with a Negro baby.

If that future is cool with you, become the MUDSHARK you were clearly born to be. You most definitely dig the Brothers. So, have more Negro babies and be happy.

Anonymous · Answer

First of all, I don't think you're pregnant by your friend. It's possible, but since he eventually put a condom, it's unlikely. And you don't even know if you're pregnant yet, I'm guessing? Even if you are, it's probably by your boyfriend.

So...you have two choices. You can try to get over the guilt and not tell your boyfriend. Yes, he'll know if you end up pregnant by your friend, but that probably won't happen. You'll just try to get over the fact that you cheated on him, and hopefully the guilt won't destroy you. Or, you can tell your boyfriend you made a mistake. I can't guarantee that this will end well and that he'll agree to stay with you. It's up to him to decide. but if you do decide to tell him, you should do it sooner rather than later...your odds are better that way.

Camilus · Answer

"I currently live with my boyfriend in his condo. He drives me to school." You have 9 months to find a new place to live.

christian2724 · Answer

It is so hard not to scold you and ask questions.

I think you should just keep your mouth shut. Say you're pregnant. You'll probably get lucky and it'll be his kid. No need to ruin anything. I doubt it's the black friend's kid. Of course... there's a small chance it is. Anyways it's going to be bad either way, if you tell him now, or if he finds out when the kid comes out black. May as well keep your mouth shut and see if you can get away with this scott-free.

AidenBlue · Answer

You shouldn't be having kids on purpose if not married. They are not pets. They bond you for 18 years at least. You should be serous enough to be married before kids.

This is a mess. My only advice is to stop being you. You are an immature 17 year old that won't understand how stupid you are being until you are 25. Oh well.

AllTheSameToMe · Answer

I'm still hung up on the fact that you are 17 and TRYING to get pregnant.

prettymuscle · Answer

how could you be pregnant by the other guy if he only had in you on for a few seconds then the condom, unless he came inside of you while his penis was in their for a few seconds without the condom, I mean if it is the black guys kid , you really can say it will look like him because maybe your side of the family DNA is stronger then his

Anikaj · Answer

Seein the given circumstances that the other dude is basically to noticeable to hide the babies true father I guess its simple that you have to muster up the courage to tell him outright but the smart thing to do is have a few friends near or do it in a public place maybe only cause when you mess around with a dudes kid and his woman and his first born at that there is no telling what he might do so really you just have to say it, there's no special way of saying it

kooky · Answer

get the guy to  consent to a dna test. A lot of money. It is a small small chance that you have the black guys kid. But tell your Boyfriend what happened. Don't expect forgiveness or you two to stay together regardless if the kid is his or not. Consider an abortion if you don't want to tell him. Besides you are really WAY TOO young to be having a kid. It will ruin your future.

Anonymous · Answer

All i have to say is:

Dont be surprised if he dumps you. (I would)
Dont be surprised if he whoops your ass (I wouldnt, but are the same time i wouldn't be mad at him)
Dont get mad if he dumps you (you officially lost the right to)
Do blame him if he no longer trusts you (you lost it and dont deserve it)

Anonymous · Answer

Get an abortion. Save the kid from

A miserable life and yourself from

Probable future child abuse/ neglect charges.

Not being sarcastic. Rather dead serious! Give yourself a chance to start fresh and think about the mess u've created.

creativeone2 · Answer

WHY ARE YOU TRYING TO GET PREGNANT AT AGE 17? I knew that show 16 and pregnant was a bad influence

Anonymous · Answer

Well I would catch a flight to Micronesia which takes about two days of flying time with stop overs and half way there I would use an airport phone and tell him from there and then board the final flight to your point of destination. That way you can always stay a head of him! Lol

samy26 · Answer

MeikaWong  you were drinking alot,oh my You took a foolish turn in life my friend.You will have to bear the consequences of such actions.How did a beautiful girl like yourself  got caught up in such a messy lifestyle? Oh dear...

GODOFSEX · Answer

I m scared by girls like u. I would rather be single for the whole life than to have a girl like u. I wish no one would get a girl like u. it will hurt, he will never trust a woman anymore.

kushman_204 · Answer

well just tell him that you slept with another dude and the kid is his and nothing else to say  because its your fault and you have to deal with fact that your having a kid with someone you cheated with and don't love, so good luck with that

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