What is the difference between silent treatment and no contact after breakup ?

I often hear giving your ex the silent treatment. Is that the same as n/c ? My boyfriend broke up with me 3 months ago and we have no contact... Show More

Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think there's any effective difference between "no contact" and "silent treatment". What matters is that he doesn't want to talk to you.

    "I just don't understand how can he be so cold to me after the breakup." He's not being cold to you. You're interpreting his behavior as cold. It's an important distinction.

    "How can he acts like this to someone that he has loved for so many years ?" Again, you're probably interpreting his behavior incorrectly: he's not acting like he does in order to irritate, hurt or offend you. He's in a lot of pain now, too, but he's handling it differently.

    In my case, I don't want to talk to a girl for a long time after a breakup. I don't want to be her friend. I don't want to be friendly. It's not because I hate her, not because I'm being cold or want to hurt her. It's how I protect myself from the hurt. Talking to her, emails from her, it can all feel like reopening a wound. Lots of guys are like this.

    I know you're in a world of pain and confusion now, but it'll get better. For your sake, stop contacting him. Each time he doesn't reply, it's an excuse to torment yourself with questions.

    • Yea I think Atomizer's answer is correct. me and my ex dated a year and didn't talk for 6 months after we broke up. we tried emailing, but it didn't work. he wanted friendship and I didn't at that time. slowly, we kinda stayed in contact every 6 months, sometimes more often then others. we finally decided to be friends and we kinda talk.

      you need to look at it the way he is. tell yourself, this break is good. go out with friends. experience single life. maybe that is what he wants? anyways, relax