Guys why don't you want to stay friends with an ex?
guys why don't you not want to stay friends with an ex?
Most Helpful Opinion
After you cross that line, you can't go back. Some try, but most fail. Why? Because one of you is going to be conflicted. Time (and distance) may not be the best healer, but it does heal (i.e., 'out of sight, out of mind'). I'm going through that now, as she knows/hangs out with all my friends. But I'm dealing. Nothing will be gained by forcing a friendship. You may have been friends before, but now its awkward, as you don't REALLY know how the other person was affected by the breakup. Show some understanding, and respect his desire for space from you. Friendships can be repaired/re-formed. If he was such a great friend, then wait until he wants (if ever) to do that again.
What Guys Said 10
too many memories, and it'd be too ez to go bacc to having sex, and the eventual relationship... and the headaches from it
A. We are trying to get over you.
B. We don't want you to think we still have feelings for you.
C. We don't want to feel awkward around you.
D. We broke up with you in a bad way i.e. lied about the real reason and now feel guilty about it.
E. We are sometimes immature.
F. We don't feel like it is worth it to attempt to be friends anymore.
Could be any of these or maybe even more.
Have you read the book 'Women are from Mars and Men are from Venus", There are some traits you should be aware of about men
a) men like to always win
b) its a waste of time for men to put efforts into a relationship when he knows it won't work out so he sets out to conquer fresher pastures.
c) Generally there is a big banner across their forehead saying " My ego is bigger than earth"
Does that answer why they don't want to stay friends?
let me ask you a question, if you lost a bag full of money, is it nice to see that bag everyday in front of you while you cannot get it back ?
it really hurts
so the best way to forget about what you have lost is to stay away from anything that would remind you of it.
I don't talk to them because I might think they hate me or maybe they moved on because I am lame compared to others and it might make it weird.
We don't want it to be awkward.
From personal experience: Because you broke up for a reason and spending more time around the person you liked will not help a guy get over a girl. It will prolong the pain so he's trying to block you out.
some times when things don't work out people fell odd I've had xs stay friends and I've had ones I would try to hide from in a store just depends on the situation my x wife and I get along great . I talk to her three times a week and I have a live in girlfriend and she's cool with it
The more important question is why do you want to stay friends with them? Be honest with yourself. I only stay friends when I still have feelings for them, or if I want to have someone lined up just in case. Never break up with someone until you are absolutely SURE that it's time to split. Staying friends is what people do when they're not sure. Unless they have been together for a very long time.
What Girls Said 4
it's not just guys, I'm a girl and I usaully aren't friends with my ex's when we breakup cause most times it ends on bad terms
well maybe you should stray away from his family.. if you can because that can make him annoyed.. but don't worry about him not wanting to be friends.. he will come around.. in highschool boys are weird.. I don't really remember.. but even if we didn't get a long right after.. by a years end.. things go back to being friends etc.. no biggie.. don't dwell on it.. I'm sure he will come around.
id say 80% of my exs I'm still friends with (I have 5 exs) so the one ex I'm not friends with we broke up 2 months ago. it was my longest and deepest relationship to date and I don't feel I can be friends with him anymore. I think about him so much, if I'm bored at work ill think about us having sex. and how goddam good it was. its painful. its been 2 months and I think I'm crazy to still have so many clear memories. he's tried txtin but I havnt txted him bak. not to be mean I guess after going thru break ups and remaining friends with my exs this particular ex boyfriend would be too hard for me to stay mates with. so I just have to cut all connection with him. sometimes its just for the best!
Think of it this way, what reason is there to still be friends with an ex. Usually to keep them close so you can still have them if you want them or because you just feel guilty about breaking up with them. For me, when I tried to be friends with my ex it only made it harder because I still had feelings for him and was hoping he would take me back. This only put me through more pain and I never moved on until I got away from him.
I think it is normal to want time away from an ex. It is the best way to move on. If after all the feelings are gone then maybe you can consider being friends, but for me this just isn't a good idea.