Why did my boyfriend google up "how to leave your significant other" and "how to find someone else after a break up"?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend and I are dating for just over a year now. We are close and he sleeps over at least 3 times a week if not more. He is always very affectionate with me and always cuddles and kisses me and hugs me all the time, and he's happy with me. The only little problem is that whenever we try having sexual intercourse, he is unable to successfully penetrate me and there have been a few times where it hurt so much that I let out this weird sccream and then he loses his erection. But even if I don't scream, he also has difficulty maintaining an erection.I have also noticed that his penis is inflamed and his foreskin does not go back when he is erect. But he is turned on by me. He says that he also dislikes my mother very much but, he stuck with me because I'm a nice girl and I'm wife material. He also has financial problems: in debt and olny gets part-time hours at work. I have a part-time job, but I hardly get an hours/ shifts. He also knows and has been with a lot of girls in the past, but he loves me and says I'm "the one". Now last night in his phone on google I noticed that he googled these 2 things - how to leave your significant other and how to find someone else after a break up.

-is he trying to slowly break-up with me?

-or is he trying to brush off some other girl or girls from the past that are still crazy about him?

-or is he insecure about me leaving him?

Updates

+1 y

p.s - when I asked him why he googled this, he replied "who cares" & "just for fun/ jokes", then he was asking me if I'd be upset if he left me and then I said ya, and he said its difficult to find anyone these days

Updates

+1 y

he also told me yesteday thast were good to go since both of our families approve of us, and another time he told me that if he never found me that he wouldn't be getting married he would jsut stay single

[Anonymous]

My first thought was, "Why the hell are you looking at his google searches?" and then "Why the hell are you searching his phone for google searches?" But, those are my questions and not yours so they won't help your situation in anyway...

I have a few possible answers to why he may have been searching those topics though:

The first, he is worried that you may be thinking about breaking up with him and wanted to see what warning signs to look for.

The second, he is starting to think that the relationship is not as ideal as he originally thought and was just collecting information; though, if he really wanted to break up with you he would have.

A third, a friend of his was having problems with his girlfriend and he was trying to be there and help him out; since he is in a wonderful relationship he had no experience breaking up he went to the internet for solutions.

I believe that the first scenario is the most likely.

As far as the sex and monetary issues go; those should definitely be worked on prior to getting married, or at least discussed. Those would be extremely big hang ups for me, and I would definitely question marrying a girl if I had those types of problems.

I hope everything turns out for the best, and hope you and your boyfriend can work through your problems.

[Asker]

the 1st and 3rd that you mentioned is most likely - yes he does have a buddy who has a fiesty girlfriend an that 's in a serious relationship, and ya he is insecure...

[WildxGuy06]

i agree

[Opinion Owner]

Good, then I think you have your answer; he is simply worried that you might be breaking up with him.

Make sure you reassure him that you love him dearly and you will never leave him; talk about these things and be honest with each other. This is the only way for you two to really understand what the other is feeling and thinking.

[Asker]

p.s - a doctor examined me back inthe summer and said that I'm normal..theres just some hymen tissue but there's nothing wrong and to do more foreplay with him

[Opinion Owner]

The sexual issues should be discussed with your partner as well; since I am not your partner I don't know the specifics, and I do not plan to learn them.

It seems like the problem is more on his side, but unless he gets himself checked out you will not know definitively.

[Asker]

he said that were good to go since both of our families approve of us plus he said that if he never found me he wouldn't bother to get married at all, plus he knows I really love him and he loves me too...

[Opinion Owner]

Well that is great! It has nothing to do with the sex issues, but it sounds like he is more comfortable with the idea of you two being together.

I will still encourage an open conversation about everything as you are obviously still a little hung up (you are posting your problems to strangers on the internet...).

Like I said earlier; I hope everything turns out for the best, and hope you and your boyfriend can work through your problems.

[Opinion Owner]

Thanks for best answer, I wish you the best with your dilemma.

[kholland65]

This is really odd, normally I wouldn't be one to worry about what someone does on the internet, but those search phrases are a bit of an interesting choice. If you guys haven't been able to successfully have sex yet that could pose a major issue for him, however it seems that he is half of the reason for that. Usually a guy won't mention you being the one unless he really means it. Its 50/50 right now in my opinion. I wouldn't jump to too many conclusions just because of a few google searches but I would def be on your guard. Just keep an eye of how he acts towards you. If he seems abnormally distant than he is probably one foot out the door.

[Asker]

he;s still affectionate with me and cuddling and kissing me...but I have also noticed that his foreskin doesn't go back and it hurts him when he is erect...plus he tells everyone that I'm "the one" and that he loves me

[kholland65]

I don't really know anything about the foreskin thing, but it does sound like he still does have feelings for you. I really can't figure out why he would search that stuff on google. There could be a 101 reasons for this.

[Asker]

well there is this girl at his work who is very un-attractive and that keeps talkig to I'm and is crazy about him, but he doesn't feel that same way for her because she is ugly and plus he sis with me

[vmw2008]

Yeah that doesn't sound good to me. It's possible he googled those things a while ago, but if he were worried about you leaving him, he probably would've searched something different. Like "How to tell if your significant other is about to break up with you." Something like that. His reaction seemed pretty guilty as well. I think he would've gone to much greater lengths to let you know he's not planning on leaving you if it had been no big deal.

I'd really sit down and talk with him about it. Tell him that this is an issue that has caused major concern for you, and that his answer when you found it did not leave you feeling better. I'd just straight up ask him if he wants or has thought about breaking up, and that if he cares for you at all he'd be honest.

[DinaColada]

Well, you've got a few things going on here. The screaming when you are together is problem, but there is a solution for every problem. Is he too big for you? Are you sufficiently lubricated? What is going on here? Have both of you been tested for STDs? If you have an infection of some type it could also cause pain for you sexually. As for the erection issues, he could do some pc muscle exercises that will help strengthen his downtown muscles.

You've just got to keep up the communication in a fun non-heavy way. If you can answer the questions above I may be able to help you better.

I hope this helps!

Dina

[AlessandraRossa]

Yes in my opinion he thinks about leaving you if he googled it, but this doesn't mean he will do it. .You can only show him now what he's losing , if he has any problems try to help him , be for him , ask him if everything is OK and how you can help him.. Change something in your look and he will see how beautiful girlfriend he has then he wouldn't break up. And that he has difficulty maintaining erection - that's his problem and I think with any other girl he would have such problem too, he maybe could see doctor, I think it's important.

[Asker]

I have changed my appearance - I wear black tights which he likes, plus I made my hair darker - which he likes because before it was blond and he didn't like it on me, and I let it long as well. but ya he has a prob with his penis, plus I'm tight and he has hardly any money and I doint have stable job but that's not a good reason to leave me because he knows I'm wife material

[Pankz92]

Seems like you're pretty dedicated towards him

and

Don't worry about what he googled that might be just a THING which came in his mind like that

if you have any doubts coming in your mind than simply go and ask him that what made him to googled that or simply are you thinking of break up?

But the way you told about him, honestly he sounds a bit possesive for you.

.

And penis, that's not normal if foreskin hurts

he may've to go through some surgery if really some prob. Is their

ask him to consult a doctor

.

And don't call yourself a MATERIAL :x

.

You two sounds to make a good couple

.

Wish luck :)

[Dylan1989]

Hmmm, well I don't know about the reason why he googled "how to find someone else after a break up". But maybe he googled "how to leave your significant other" because he is feeling insecure and does not think he can measure up to your standards/expectations. It seems as if there are a few unsolved issues creeping into your relationship and if you two are really close then I think you should bring your feelings to his attention and let him know how you feel. Hmmm, perhaps the whole "how to find someone else after a break up" is an indication that he is looking for someone whom he thinks has reachable standards. P.S. I have been known to overthink things so you may not wanna take my answer too seriously lol.

[Anonymous]

if his foreskin hurts him, when pulling it back, he probably should go to the doctor. that's not normal, it should go back with ease. the only way to solve that problem is to have the skin removed under surgery. I have foreskin, sorry for the details, but mine does not hurt me at during sex or when using it normally. can't help you with other problems in relationship. it doesn't make since to me why he would search that stuff in google. why don't just say I don't want to be with you anymore face to face. there is no easy way of breaking up with someone. maybe he thinks you will break up with him, he could be looking for those signs.

[Asker]

at the beginning of our relationship he was saying that he has a feeling that I'm gonna leave him and then he was saying that if he never found me, he wouldn't be getting married and just stay single

[Opinion Owner]

well sound like to me, he is worried that you will leave him. if he is insecure about it. you need talk a lot more to him about it. tell him stop avoiding the topic. relationships is about communication. that's the biggest problem with relationships these days, and that's why so many fall apart. they just rely on the other partner to guess them out.

[Asker]

ya he was asking me the other night if my mother is trying to find me another guy and that girls these days have smartened up and they don't leave their man even if she is better looking or prettier than him

[Opinion Owner]

like I said talk to him, be absolutely honest with him, so he should be with you. tell your parents to butt out. but at the same I will take their advice into consideration. your an adult, tell them I am old enough to make own decisions, and now your causing problems with me and my boyfriend. talk your parents in a nice way. don't be rude about it. make them understand your situation.

[Opinion Owner]

the only way your relationship will be better and stronger, is you keep communicating with each other. at end of the day, we can't guess what your boyfriend thinks and acts, we could give a thousand answers, but none them will sound any better than the next one. only you and him can sort this problem out by talking. sorry to sound patronizing to you.

[katiesmuff]

Sounds to me like he has some real emotional problems

[Asker]

he is very sensitive and he's a nervous-impatient type...and he was presecribed anti-depressants last summer

[MeridiansAAngel]

well , if your really as close as you say you are, I think you should just come out and ask him, a. do you wanna break up, andb. if you don't why would you google this?

Dont leave yourself wondering girl.

-A

[Anonymous]

sounds like he's planning on breaking up with you. It is possible he was worried you would break up with him, but that's unlikely, why else would he google "how to find someone else after a breakup"? Prepare to be dumped

[nicenthic]

He is obviously considering leaving you.

[Asker]

why do you say that? is he insecure?