It will take awhile, and a lot of work. But, the chances of her getting back with you are very slim. And if she does get back with you, the relationship will not be the same as before.
You can start off by apologizing. If she refuses to answer your calls, or answer the door, then write in a letter. Or email. Tell her how wrong you were, and how much you love her.
Then after that, leave her alone for a little bit. Maybe a week or so. She is definitely hurt and angry about what you did. So just give her that space to herself.
After a couple of days, send her flowers. Don't see her in person. Just leave it at her door, or in her locker, or car, wherever. Leave the flowers for her, and a card. In the card, apologize again, and tell her how much you miss and love her.
She probably won't call you or anything which is fine. You have to understand she is in pain. A lot of pain.
Do the flowers thing for the next couple of days. If not flowers, bring her lunch, or dinner, or chocolates. Always include a card, or a note. You can see her in person, or leave it as a suprise. Usually suprises are better. That way, you won't know if she kept it, and smiled, or if she stomped on it, or threw it away.
Either way, it's the thought that counts. And by pursuing her like this, it tells her that you are truly sorry, and that she does mean everything to you.
But I do have to say, most relationships that were affected by cheating usually changes, in a bad way. The most important thing called Trust, dies, and the whole relationship becomes handicapped.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, if she does come back to you, don't expect her to respect you the way she used to, or even be loyal to you the way she was. Cheating destroys everything, and it's almost impossible to bring the relationship back to the way it used to be.
Good luck though.
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That's a hard thing. My best advice is give her time. That takes a little time to heal. However, though you know you messed up, you did it for a reason. You are now regretting it but what's to say you won't want to do it again once you get her back and comfortable again? You need to make sure you are capable of being faithful this time. That this desperate need for her back isn't just because you are not ready to be rejected. If you don't know why you did it to begin with, and 100% sure you will not find yourself in the same place, then leave her alone. It's not fair to her if she does come back and you wind up doing it again. And unless you truly know why you did it this time you cannot be sure you won't again.
Everyone knows cheating is SO WRONG. Obviously she is going to get really pissed off and not want you anymore. A relationship is based on trust and love and if you broke her trust then it is very hard to get it again. If she is the type of girl to accept that then you are very lucky but I wouldn't ever accept that. If you want her back I say try to keep talking to her and keep on telling her how much you mean to her and how much you regret what you did. If she wants you back after you try your hardest it will happen. If she blocked your number its most likely she doesn't want you anymore. I say move on and don't make the same mistake again.
Dude, you're a loon. And now you get to learn that cheaters NEVER prosper.
You "F"'d up in the WORST possible way. Exactly what did you THINK was going to happen?
She's gone. Get over it. You have ZERO rights to think otherwise.
If she went back to you she should have her head examined. She'd be a total loser to accept someone like you back in her life. Really. Think about it. Just like the other post stating that this is not like forgetting to call or forgetting her birthday because that shit happens. But you nailed another woman while she was your girlfriend of nearly 2 years? Total blow it dude.
Best advice to someone who has made this extreme mistake... move along... find someone else...preferrably someone who will NEVER meet your Ex and find out what kind of fool you are.
Sorry to be harsh but exactly what did you expect? Show some class and quit stalking her as of now. If you care for her at all then give her a chance to find someone nice to forget about you.
Good luck, you're going to need it unless you change how you think with the next girl.
First, what the hell did you tell her for? It was a one-time thing, so why not let it die? I hope you learned something important here.
Second, same to your girlfriend, and you should ask her: it was a one-time thing, so why not let it die? A fling merits time in the doghouse, not the end of the relationship.
Third, hard as this sounds, you don't have to get her back. There's only so much time you can spend on your knees before it becomes ridiculous. If this doesn't sort itself out soon, shelve her and let her come to you.
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If I were you, I'd start writing her letters. Lots of letters. I don't know if it can ever help. Once the trust is broken, it sometimes can't be mended. By changing her phone number, she's shows that she's not messing around. I can see that you're genuinely sorry, so I hope it can be mended. All the best.
At least you had enough respect for her to tell her and honestly, you knew what she was going to do. But you where hoping she would forgive you and that didn't happen of course.
I can't imagine a sane woman, with self respect putting up with that, no matter how honest and respectful the gesture was to tell her.
You know you F*cked up and you know you lost her. If she did for some insane reason came back to you, your girlffreind isn't going to be the same girlfreind you once had and your not going to like being in that situation, even if you feel you deserve it.
She is lost to you, time to move on dude. I give you kudo's for being a man by telling her but now it is time to be a real man and just let it go.
Learn from this major mistake and never do it again. You lost a good one. Hopefully you find someone else that is almost as good.
Sorry for being brutaly honest. good luck man.i'm sorry, but you really shot yourself in the foot here. cheating is the ultimate betrayal. you f***ed up the emotional and physical trust of the relationship. I wouldn't take you back if you kissed the ground on walked on and begged me and cried and apologized over and over because I'd never believe anything you say. cheating is a huge deal and if the tables were turned and it was you being betrayed like that, you'd feel the same way. it might've been a huge mistake in your eyes, but to her, it was a purposeful action that you took the time to do. I'm glad you were honest with her, but every action has a consquence and her hating you is the consquence of cheating. I hope she heals and doesn't take it out on the next guy and I hope you've learned from your mistake. :(
Oh wow, that's really messed up. If you really love her you might want to rethink it because if you loved her in the first place you would have never cheated on her...but if you really think about it you and you do you just need to follow your heart and write her a long letter explaining everything you feel. I really do feel like your not like all the other cheaters and would do it again. Just give her time though because that will help her don't keep bothering her over and over again because then she will keep changing everything so you don't have any contact with her at all.
uh, sorry. I don't think you will get her back. the only thing I can suggest at getting her back is get her trust. when your with a girl, she gives you her heart and expects you to protect it. she trusted you and when you did what you did, you blew it. she won't trust you, not after your stunt. the only thing you may get back to is, friendship if even that. if you really want her back, give her another reason to trust you. my ex did that with me, cheated, and he just left it at that. what made his cheating worse is that he did it with my best friend. so, I know how she feels. I may have forgiven my ex if he had at least attempted to fix everything. to try and give me a reason to know he felt guilty. to tell me that he was sorrying and try and win back my trust. but he didn't. if you can get her to trust you again, she might take you back. maybe.
thats exactly what happened to me. if you took her virginity it makes it hurt even more. she needs time to think things through. I was so angry I would try and say the meanest things and give the meanest looks. I was mad for about a week and then lightened up. I did end up hooking up with another guy before I started talking to him first, if she does that do not get mad at her. let her know that that hurt you but she did not do anything wrong. its very hard for the girl to earn the trust back. I'm back together with the guy that cheated on me after a month. what he did was give me my space, took whatever I threw at him, and still let me know that he was here for me. after a while I began to trust him again (still not completely) and we've been getting better.
dont get mad at her for flirting or talking to another guy for a while... it will remind her you cheated on herI think the best thing for a guy to do is get down on his knees and tell her how much you love her, miss her etc. Tell her you were stupid. Tell her anything that you are feeling. There is nothing more simpathetic to me than when a guy says something and you can see in his eyes that he really really means it. With the great amount of pride that guys have I understand that it is hard for you to say how supid you are and I would really belive you. That will melt her heart, but if you ever do something stupid like that again she will never EVER look back so be never cheat on her we always find out.
Good luckman I'm responding after 2 months, I know you still love ur girl for now I don't know if you got her back or what I don't know but I must say this..
to all the people who called you idiot, stupid whatever they can fu** off
but in other way I must say ur an idiot, you know why ? you never tell her when you cheat
what's up with u? yeah go cheat do whatever you want, there's no reason for us guy to cheat, it just happens
but in case you didn't win her back, for the next time don't do that again---> I don't mean the cheating, I mean the" telling her " part.
i know you won't like my answer and you too gezc19 but fu** it lol
and for all the other guys, stop acting like angels,( you know what I mean GUYS, We're fu**ing guys) now you wanna be faithful? what you wanna change the laws of life ?
haha have fun hating me :Dif you loved her, you wouldn't do that.
it's called control over physical needs.
maybe it's just me, but I wouldn't look back. it's happened to me. it's painful for a girl to go through that sh*t, so I couldn't forgive my ex even if my life depended on it.even if she comes back, she won't trust you anymore and that's a shame. this has happened to me, I was so p*ssed but didn't break up but I couldn't trust him anymore and was getting suspiscious every time he was out without me and that's really not cool for the cheated and the cheater..
I don't have to go through the whole schbeal about 'loving your gf, how could you cheat in the first place.' I'm sure you've got that down pat. Glad to hear you came clean ASAP. But people cheat for a reason. It never "Just happens". Out of respect for her, let her go. If she wants you back, she'll come around. In the meantime, let this be a lesson learned.
Let it go dude--you screwed up and despite what one poster said you deserved to be dumped. How would you feel if she said she had a one night stand with some dude?
This was no little relationship mistake, like forgetting to make a phone call when you said you would--dude--you slept with another woman. This was a huge breach in trust!
I didn't put up with the kinda of BS and I am married to a wonderful man--so much for spinster hood...shouldn't have cheated ... sorry...
i happen to still be with my boyfriend after he cheated on me twice (only when we first got together) now it's very hard for me to even consider leaving him even though I know deep down that he's not good for me... but since when has anyone done what's best for them.
what made you cheat? just curious. it shows that you really regret what you did to her. good luck man, I'm really sorryThese days, around half of all marriages end in divorce.
That’s a pretty sad statistic… especially because so many of those divorces are preventable.
In reality, many marriages end prematurely. Why? Well, there are two reasons.
Neither spouse knows how to prevent the passion, intimacy, and romantic connection from gradually fading away.
They make the 3 “Marriage Murdering Mistakes” that very few people know about… and sadly, these 3 mistakes can quickly drive your marriage into disaster and divorce.
If you’re in this situation…
If your marriage is dead-as-a-doornail…
If you’re heading towards divorce, or even if you’re already at that point…
Then a new marriage coach Drlawrencespelltemple@hotmail. com will show you how to stop the downward spiral and breathe some life back into your relationship. (Lawrence is a freakin’ genius, by the way.)Wow. If you really love her, show it by leaving her alone. If you do get back together you'll have trust issues until your partnership falls apart again, and it will. Frankly, if she never talks to you again it'll stand as tribute to her own healthy sense of self-esteem. Hopefully the pain you endure for your betrayal will teach you the wisdom to stay true to your next partner.
There's no way to know if she'll take you back. Give it time and let her see that even long after the fact, you're still torn up over having f'd up. Tell her you did something so stupid that you can't excuse it, but you never stopped caring about her and are begging for a 2nd chance.
Okay, read this really late, but engaged? Already? I think your moving a wee bit too fast here. But hey. That's just me... I read in a love sex and lasting relationships course that if a person has gotten out of a long relationship that they should be single for at least 12 or so months. So that you can heal completely and not go into the rebound stage... Be careful. Marriage is suppose to be forever. Not just something you do to get over with. Choose wisely..
Give her time to think first...you hurt her and she needs time to heal all the pain...If you really love her, show her sincerity that you're very sorry of what happened...win her trust back first before winning her love..Love is nothing without trust...
honestly do you even think you deserve her? if she does get back with you its going to take a lot of work and probably a long time. honestly it sounds like she's over you especially if she has changed her number. when a girl does that that means she is through and doesn't want anything to do with you.
The only way I would take a guy back if he cheated on me was if I was planning some type of revenge like cheating on him back with someone he was close to or hurting him in some way.
Honestly if the tables were turned and she did all that to you, would you want her back *be honest*? Sounds like you lost her for good, now you know not to make that mistake in your next relationship.
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