He proposed then ended things 2 weeks later

[sugahsweet18]

Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated, I'm so upset about this.

Two weeks ago me and my boyfriend of one and a half years went on holidays, we went on a trip to visit some of his extended family across the country from us, for 2 weeks. On our way driving he proposed, I said yes, right afterward he called his parents to share the good news. We got back on our way, I met his family, he shared the news, everyone was congratulating us, we stayed for a week with them, doing various outdoor activities, had a few minor disagreements, but we worked everything out right away. Then we started are way back home with a week stop in to see his sister and spend some time with their kids. He wasn't hesitating on sharing the news, even with comlete strangers. Then suddenly today we finished up our drive home, a couple of hours away and he suddenly ended things. There was absolutely no arguments on the drive back so this hit me out of no where. I found out shortly after we got engaged that he had told my best friend 4 months ago that he was going to propose on our trip. He also had told his mom the week before we left. The proposal wasn't a big surprise because we had picked out the ring together 2 months back. So basically, the decision to propose was one he thought out long and carefully and was planning for awhile even well before picking the ring. Out of no where when we were driving home he just started saying that he wasn't the type to settle down and commit and that he wanted to be a "playboy and sleep with lots of women" and "he missed the chase of trying to find someone" The thing about this is, he's never been the one-night stand type of person, he prefers to sleep with someone he has feelings for and he's definitely a one woman guy. No one was pressuring him to propose, he was the one who brought it up to family, and it was something we discussed before. He started talking about wanting to go see strippers and try hitting on them (we have been out to watch strippers a few times together as part of foreplay). His behavior is so unlike him, I'm not sure what to think, if he just got really scared suddenly at the enormity of marriage, or what. He told me he still loves me, and admitted that from the day he propsed to today the only thing that changed was putting a ring on my finger, and that he had no doubts whatsoever when he asked, but now he just wants to "see what's out there" I don't know what to do, I'm devastated.

[Daggersanctuary]

... Then why the f*** did he propose?! I hate men who says he wants commitment and then p****foots around like that! What the hell?! He doesn't even know what the hell he wants! This is the most pussified son of a bitch I have ever heard of! You propose and then 2 weeks later you break it off?! And for what? "He wants to be the playboy type and sleep with lots of women"?

F***ing retard! This pisses me the hell off!

Now watch how he won't find anybody and'll start crawling his sorry ass back. F***ing prick!

This craptastic excuse for a man doesn't deserve the time of day from you. You can do so much better! Also I'm sorry for the rant, my ex-boyfriend did something like that. He pushed me into a relationship because he was jealous of one of my guy friends and then broke up with me 2 weeks later because he wasn't ready to be committed. If you know you aren't ready to be committed then don't push anybody else into being in a relationship!

[Skyler123]

...I don't understand why this was voted down. This is nothing but the truth. This dude truly has some major issues. I agree with you Daggersanctuary

[Daggersanctuary]

thanks. This guy is a grown man. He knew exactly what he was doing

[justceasing]

Well I've been in your exact position before except I was engaged for a day. And when he ended it I thought it was the anger talking so I never did. I told all of my family, his family. A month and a half of arguing and him telling me to take the ring off, I finally gave it to him. Was I hurt? Very. Upset. Confused, but at the same time I could care less. If marriage to some people is suppose to be something you can just cut off when you're mad, then don't attempt it. You're not alone trust me. Some guys are just stupid as f*** and will always think with their d*** and not logically or with their heart. It's quite sad to me but hey...I never told anyone the engagement was off. Although they see me without the ring all the time. It's crazy that they haven't asked me where it is. Because really I don't know.

[sugahsweet18]

If we had gotten into a big fight very recently after the proposal I would be able to chalk it up to that, but everything seemed to be going well, he never stopped being affectionate, he never stopped saying he loves me. It was completely out of leftside.

[justceasing]

that's exactly what happened to me. am I still with the guy? yeah. and when he told me to take the ring off, I never did. we'd go places and he'd introduce me to people as his girlfriend...so that just made me want to give it back to him even more...ugh

[pips1]

Well its two things he has met someone behind your back or he has just started thinking too much and now is panicking can I ask how old he is it may be he feels he isn't ready yet. Give him a ultimatum or some space and ask him is it what he really wants but be prepaid to walk away if you have to.

[sugahsweet18]

he's 34, and didn't have a chance to meet someone else on our 2 week trip, we spent the entire time together, which wasn't the first time we have spent that long together.

[Hello_World]

So you looked at strippers together, which he lusted over, and now he wants them, and you are surprised?

Have you seen the movie Hall Pass?... When he comes back because its not as glamorous as it appears, I hope you don't accept his stupid ways. How do you feel about being cheated on in 5 years time.

His loss girl!

[martyfellow]

Some guys do get cold feet and want to fulfill some fantasies before settling down. Girls too, for that matter. I'd suggest you give him a list of deal breaking things that you won't accept him doing, and give him a deadline to get over this head trip he's on. He might come around to reason in just a few days!

[MeridiansAAngel]

i think he is just.. shocked by how real his commitment would have been to you and it may have scared him off, even though he proposed on his own, without pressure.. so are you guys done for good or just no marriage?

-A

[Skyler123]

Why are people making excuses for this guy? He is a grown adult man. He knew the implications of marriage and then suddenly bales out like that? That is the act of an immature little boy. He has a lot of issues he needs to resolve. I truly hope he does not get into another relationship soon because the same exact thing is going to happen all over again.

[adelf252]

Cold feet. Some guys are like this and busy don't realize how it devastates their partner. Talk to him and let him know how you really feel.

[Anonymous]

Well, I'd be pissed!

haha- whatta douche.

I guess I don't have anything to answer your direct question, but if he changes his mind, you better be careful with the decision of continuing! You don't want him to be thinking this again, except this time two weeks after you're married.

[Anonymous]

got afraid of being committed to one girl