I have a little frustration and anger towards social pressures put on all of us to pick a certain type of guy/girl. We go out with someone that does not fit this ideal and we nervously glance around see if anyone recognizes us!
Personally I refuse to go out with the Ken or Barbie of the dating world. I find that they are valued WAY MORE than what they are worth. Barbie is usually a tall blond with big boobs and a powerful Job. Ken is a six footer with sandy hair and inevitably a brainless lawyer that goes to strip bars on the weekends. Why do we value these people so much, when someone a little different might be so much better? You may not have impressed the friends or family with Akbar the research student but… who… fucking… cares…
Lynn likes black guys
Lynn really likes black guys, she has never had much success with white guys. Her mother is not very pleased that for the last 10 years, she has been bringing home the wrong color . Thank GOD Lynn does not listen to her mother.
Why does Lynn break this cultural Taboo in the city of Detroit, one of the most racist places in the US? Lynn feels that she is far more appreciated by black guys. She has a bit more junk in the trunk, which she feels is not very appreciated by whites. If Lynn goes into a bar she feels that a much higher quality black guy will talk to her than a white guy. Since Lynn does not fit the Barbie physique, she does not feel confident around the guys that hold this up as their ideal.
The dork finally gets the girl
Japan is a heaven for geeky guys. Endless streams of dorky Western guys get their first girlfriend in Japan. Although some of them go a little Austin Powers on the place and don’t know when to stop! There is a pretty funny cartoon about this in a popular Japanese magazine for foreigners. It is about a geeky guy in Japan that becomes CHARISMA MAN!!! his arch enemy is the WESTERN GIRL.
In Japan Charisma Man is complemented for his physique when in his home country he was ridiculed. He is told he looks like Brad Pitt when he more closely resembles Forest Gump. He is popular for once in his life only fearing that his arch enemy Western Girl might force him back in the box from whence came.
Barbie is pissed
It was strange to see an average guy become a superstar in Japan but even more fascinating, to see a pretty girl become average. For most guys this was delightful… Barbie was no longer desired, in fact Barbie couldn’t even get a date! This inevitably drives a lot of girls out of Japan desperately wanting the attention they originally had in their home country.
So why didn’t the western girls date the Japanese guys? Good question! This is where their Ken doll image of the perfect guy failed them. The Japanese guys tended to not be as large or tall as westerners. They were very polite and often not masculine enough for western girls. Often Japanese men were very intimidated by western girls and were terrified to ask them out. This is a horrible shame.
Sharon breaks the rules
Sharon was a very cool girl… She and I become good friends when I first moved to Japan. She was one of the few girls not bitter about the guys choosing Japanese girls. Sharon was smart, she realized that she was ignoring a vast resource of men by focusing on westerners only.
The major problem was that Sharon was a bit bigger than the Japanese girls. She was model tall and had a full figure. Sharon wanted to be with a bigger guy to make her feel more feminine, (understandable but not necessary!) She was brilliant in finding the solution…
Sharon boldly started visiting the local fire station where the men were much taller and beefier than the typical guy. The firefighters where excited and baffled at this tall large breasted western girl giving them attention! She was instantly rolling in men… She was invited to many fire fighter functions and eventually married one of them.
Trout or bass?
Imagine that you are a fisherman and the most popular fish to catch is bass. There are a lot of other fishermen fishing for bass too and the competition is high. You might catch one or two bass on a good day but it is barely enough to feed you. One day the wind kicks up and you are blown into a new area.
Suddenly you catch a trout! and another, and another!! You now have 10 fish in your bucket. You take out a trout and look at it. It is not as big as a bass but it has its own qualities. You eat the trout and it is very good, the flavor is different but still delicious! If you are smart you say “screw bass!” I like trout!
Break the norm
The guy is short, thin, bald, black, white, Asian, a garbage man, a computer geek. So what…!!! If you are valued by someone not the norm embrace this!! This is your trout, it may make other people uncomfortable but this is your life not theirs.
Mike Masters writes a blog for women about relationships at MikeTheMasterDater.com. Traveling the world and dating every single girl he met along the way allowed Mike to make an uncountable number of mistakes in relationships. These mistakes led to a fluency in the psychology of dating that could only be gained from radical immersion.
Personally I refuse to go out with the Ken or Barbie of the dating world. I find that they are valued WAY MORE than what they are worth. Barbie is usually a tall blond with big boobs and a powerful Job. Ken is a six footer with sandy hair and inevitably a brainless lawyer that goes to strip bars on the weekends. Why do we value these people so much, when someone a little different might be so much better? You may not have impressed the friends or family with Akbar the research student but… who… fucking… cares…
Lynn likes black guys
Lynn really likes black guys, she has never had much success with white guys. Her mother is not very pleased that for the last 10 years, she has been bringing home the wrong color . Thank GOD Lynn does not listen to her mother.
"I find the Kens or Barbies of the dating world are valued WAY MORE than what they are worth."
Why does Lynn break this cultural Taboo in the city of Detroit, one of the most racist places in the US? Lynn feels that she is far more appreciated by black guys. She has a bit more junk in the trunk, which she feels is not very appreciated by whites. If Lynn goes into a bar she feels that a much higher quality black guy will talk to her than a white guy. Since Lynn does not fit the Barbie physique, she does not feel confident around the guys that hold this up as their ideal.
The dork finally gets the girl
Japan is a heaven for geeky guys. Endless streams of dorky Western guys get their first girlfriend in Japan. Although some of them go a little Austin Powers on the place and don’t know when to stop! There is a pretty funny cartoon about this in a popular Japanese magazine for foreigners. It is about a geeky guy in Japan that becomes CHARISMA MAN!!! his arch enemy is the WESTERN GIRL.
In Japan Charisma Man is complemented for his physique when in his home country he was ridiculed. He is told he looks like Brad Pitt when he more closely resembles Forest Gump. He is popular for once in his life only fearing that his arch enemy Western Girl might force him back in the box from whence came.
Barbie is pissed
It was strange to see an average guy become a superstar in Japan but even more fascinating, to see a pretty girl become average. For most guys this was delightful… Barbie was no longer desired, in fact Barbie couldn’t even get a date! This inevitably drives a lot of girls out of Japan desperately wanting the attention they originally had in their home country.
So why didn’t the western girls date the Japanese guys? Good question! This is where their Ken doll image of the perfect guy failed them. The Japanese guys tended to not be as large or tall as westerners. They were very polite and often not masculine enough for western girls. Often Japanese men were very intimidated by western girls and were terrified to ask them out. This is a horrible shame.
Sharon breaks the rules
Sharon was a very cool girl… She and I become good friends when I first moved to Japan. She was one of the few girls not bitter about the guys choosing Japanese girls. Sharon was smart, she realized that she was ignoring a vast resource of men by focusing on westerners only.
The major problem was that Sharon was a bit bigger than the Japanese girls. She was model tall and had a full figure. Sharon wanted to be with a bigger guy to make her feel more feminine, (understandable but not necessary!) She was brilliant in finding the solution…
Sharon boldly started visiting the local fire station where the men were much taller and beefier than the typical guy. The firefighters where excited and baffled at this tall large breasted western girl giving them attention! She was instantly rolling in men… She was invited to many fire fighter functions and eventually married one of them.
Trout or bass?
Imagine that you are a fisherman and the most popular fish to catch is bass. There are a lot of other fishermen fishing for bass too and the competition is high. You might catch one or two bass on a good day but it is barely enough to feed you. One day the wind kicks up and you are blown into a new area.
Suddenly you catch a trout! and another, and another!! You now have 10 fish in your bucket. You take out a trout and look at it. It is not as big as a bass but it has its own qualities. You eat the trout and it is very good, the flavor is different but still delicious! If you are smart you say “screw bass!” I like trout!
Ignore the social pressures!
- If you are in a lake of hungry trout, why are you demanding bass?
- In a sea of trout, finding a great one is much easier than in a pond of bass
- Did you like coffee the first time? That different guy is the same
- Your happiness is far more important than your families/friend’s discomfort
Break the norm
The guy is short, thin, bald, black, white, Asian, a garbage man, a computer geek. So what…!!! If you are valued by someone not the norm embrace this!! This is your trout, it may make other people uncomfortable but this is your life not theirs.
Mike Masters writes a blog for women about relationships at MikeTheMasterDater.com. Traveling the world and dating every single girl he met along the way allowed Mike to make an uncountable number of mistakes in relationships. These mistakes led to a fluency in the psychology of dating that could only be gained from radical immersion.
Most Helpful Opinions