Why women are not interested in "nice guys"

[guy532]

I've been on this site for a looong time and one thing that NEVER fails to pop up is that women do not date "nice guys". This is the typical situation I see: the guy who is crazy about one of his close female friends asks her out after being interested in her for a long time and she rejects him. He gets mad and thinks "how dare she not want me, I've been nothing but nice to her" and generally he is right, he has been nothing but nice to her and he would probably make a wonderful boyfriend if given the opportunity. I've been in a similar situation in the past and have had the same thoughts run through my head. However, now that I'm much more experienced I know how wrong this "nice guy" mentality actually is.

The real and obvious reason a girl won't date a nice guy or any other guy she turns down is because she is not interested in him. I know, that's so dumbed down and obvious, but it brings up the next points. What are some possible reasons why a girl is not interested?

1. No physical attraction

Simple, she's not physically attracted to you and no matter how nice you are, it's just not enough for a women to see you in a romantic way if there is no physical attraction. The solution to this is: work out, stay well groomed/clean, and keep up with fashion (that still won't be enough though if you're a "nice guy" as you'll see when I get to my main point). Before you get mad and call women superficial, do you really think you'd date a woman whom you feel zero attraction towards if you have other more attractive options just because she's nice? Yea don't think so and if you say otherwise all you're doing is lying to yourself.

2. Your personalities don't match up

I don't think this needs much of an explanation, she doesn't think you two get along well enough to be a couple.

3. You're too clingy/weird

There is a thing as being too nice. Being too nice can be just plain weird sometimes and seen as obsessive and lacking confidence. Everyone knows the phrase "if it's too good to be true, it probably isn't". It's the same thing with being nice, what are you trying to make up for that you're being that nice? Is that ALL you have to offer? Just being nice? If being nice is what defines you then all you are is a pushover and being a pushover does not scream confidence and women love confidence.

Imagine you're friends with a girl and you casually tell her "ugh I really wanted a snickers bar, but I couldn't find one anywhere around here". An hour later she shows up with a snickers bar and tells you she drove 30 minutes away to get one for you. This is a real life example, a friend of mine did this to a female friend he had a huge crush on and yes he's a very nice guy and no she was definitely not interested in him. Doing something like that is NOT nice or romantic if it's not justified, it's just plain weird. You only think it's going to earn you brownie points because you're interested in her. Imagine if a female friend of yours who you only see as friend did this. You'd think "aww that's sweet, but wtf why did she do this? This chick really needs to calm herself." That girl you got the snickers bar for thinks the same. Big romantic/nice gestures are only seen as romantic/nice if both parties feel the same way about each other, otherwise it shows a huge lack of knowledge of common social rules and social norms.

4. You're a giant pussy

Forward? Yes, but it's simple and gets the point across. This is also my main point. Do you really think a woman is going to suddenly fall in love with you if all you do is be nice to her? Hell no. If it was that easy this site wouldn't exist and most guys would never have a problem finding a girl because most guys are nice guys, it's one of the most common traits. For some reason "nice guys" associate being nice to not making any romantic moves towards women or flirting with them. They believe that being nice is flirting, which it is not, being nice and flirting are completely different. Crazy enough they see guys who actively flirt with women as assholes which makes zero sense (I do have a theory though and it is just a theory). Being nice =/= flirting and flirting =/= you're an asshole.

If you're not properly flirting with the girl you're interested in it only means you lack the confidence to do so and if we know anything it's that women love confidence. This is what women mean by confidence, you flirt with them and show them your interest. The absolute killer combination is to be a nice guy who knows how to properly flirt with women and show his interest towards them. Do you know how weird it is if you go to the female friend you're crushing on and ask her out without ever flirting with her and seeing how she responds? All it means is that you were purposely nice/her friend just so you can win her over, that's not what being a friend or being nice is all about, that's actually very deceitful and an asshole move. The real nice thing to do is express to her that you like her through playful flirting the moment you start liking her in a romantic way.

BONUS. Why women only date "assholes"

It's actually quite simple and you've probably heard it a bunch of times before, the reason women date "assholes" is because they possess traits that are seen as confidence. However, this is not what I want to get across. I want to get across why nice guys view the men women date as assholes even though the overwhemingly large majority are not.

Scenario: Nice guy likes a girl who is dating another guy. The relationship ends and the girl gets sad. Nice guy sees his crush sad and thinks her ex is an asshole for making her sad. What did this "asshole" possess that allowed him to get the girl in the first place? Positive qualities that women search for, most notably the confidence to flirt with women properly. Hence why nice guys view flirting/confidence as something only associated with assholes.

Lastly, what woman would actually choose to date an asshole? No sane woman wants to be treated like shit and/or get cheated on. When a normal woman actually does date a real asshole it's because she was tricked into thinking that the asshole was actually a nice guy (which is clearly an asshole move done by the asshole guy). The only people that do actively search for assholes have issues and you should probably not want to date them in the first place.

[LorcaNovena]

I don't know why men spend so much time worrying about women want and less time worrying about what they want. Women are not these goddesses that need to be put on pedestals and I think it's lame that these nice guy and bad boy labels exist and that men actually feel the need to be labelled as such.

I don't care what women want from a man, if they like what they see with me, brilliant, if they don't, well they don't and they are free to buzz off and search for someone else.

[skykidx1]

Give this man a fucking cookie

[AryaP]

exactly... the society has turned women into these objects that men must chase after and revolve their life around its pretty stupid

[RJGraveyTrain]

*Slow clap*

You did a really good job. I very much agree with this take and I really hope every nice guy out there takes the time to read it. I have no criticism to offer.

[guy532]

Thanks 😊

[Applefan1]

The way I see it is there are guys that are generally nice and kind guys and then those that think they are nice guys when really they are not. The problem is the genuinely nice guys get lumped into the looser category when they are not losers.

Point 1:

I agree with this. The truth is looks matter to everyone to some extent. Some people don't like to admit this but it is true. To date someone you need some level of physical attraction to them. It is human nature for a man and a woman to be attracted by looks and the idea that it makes you shallow is not true. I mean put it this way if a man has the choice between two girls one that is not at all attractive looking but has a great personality and another girl that is attractive looking and has a great personality to he will automatically go for the girl that has both, women will also do the same with men. It is not being shallow just human nature. So your first point agree with.

Point 2

This is a very valid point. If a man and women's personalities do not match up they are not right for each other. This could mean the man or woman could tell them "I am sorry but I don't think we are suited for each other". Saying that is not a person being a jerk or a bitch it is just facing the fact that a man and woman can not always date each other because personalities clash.

Point 3

Yes, some people both men and also some women to don't get the point there is such a thing as being too nice. You don't have to come running every time a woman has a small problem, I have found women like to solve their own problems a lot of the time. I think some men need to realise that there is a difference between being a nice person and being a push over. A man can be a nice person and at the same time not be a push over. Some men need to realise they can stand up for their rights without being a jerk about it and still remaining a nice person. Flirting with women is great but at the same time you can't ignore the fact some women are fast to label men as creeps when the man has not done anything wrong and reject them in the most nasty way possible. Not all women do this but there certainly no shortage of women that do. So when that happens you can not blame a guy for being uncomfortable with flirting with women. Also yes some women are tricked into dating a guy they think are good guys and have the guy change later. However, some women are also just terrible at picking up on the signs of an asshole to.

[Applefan1]

Women that find every guy they date is an asshole are clearly choosing the wrong guys and have a bad choice of guys. Any woman can be truly tricked a few times but if ever guy she is dating is an asshole it is either her with the problem or she is not picking up on clear signs that he is an asshole.

[Applefan1]

Point 4

There are things I agree with and things I don't here. Remember what I said about some women innocently calling guys that have done nothing wrong as creeps for showing interest in them. Well that is a real problem. That would knock anyones confidence. However, I do agree with what you said about being nice and flirting as different things. I think some guys don't get flirting to, most women don't like a random butt grab or a sexual comment. If your a guy and do that then stop because for most women you are doing it all wrong and sexually harassing the woman. As for the guys that don't do this and get labeled creeps I have sympathy for. I agree with you on the fact that guys that actively flirt are not assholes and it is crazy to think they are. However, not all nice men think that actively flirting with women makes you an asshole. I can see many of your points but don't forget that there are many men that get labeled as creeps etc by women that are honestly not creeps.

[guy532]

Yes you're definitely right about there being some women who have a very strong track record of dating assholes, I have female friends that are know for that. That's why though they're female friends, I don't ever want to get involved with them because there is obviously something wrong. So when it comes to women like that, it doesn't matter since you shouldn't want to date them to begin with. I made that point too. Now as the creepy thing goes I kind of have to disagree. There are some women that think any guy who talks to them or shows interest and who isn't a model is a creep, but really who cares? Those are the incredibly vain women who have their heads in the clouds. Believe me, you can do much better. For normal women though that think a guy is creepy, it's because he messed up and did do something that came off as creepy. I'm guilty of this, I've definitely fumbled and then thought shit I fked up the moment you get that ugh stare. It happens, more so in the beginning. Once you

[guy532]

get better at flirting though it very rarely happens.

[Applefan1]

Yes I agree. If a woman only ever meets assholes then she is doing something wrong and instead of blame men she should look at herself. The number of women that get mad when you say this though lol. I disagree with your comments about women thinking guys are creepy though. There are more women that call guys creepy for no reason than you think. Many women throw that word around for no reason. Don't let women fool you into thinking it is always us men because it is women with the problem more often than most women want to admit.

[abacaxi84]

Great take. I have been saying over and over again on this site that women do not like arseholes, they like confidence. It's just that unfortunately arseholes tend to have confidence (a trait we do like) which is why we end up mistakenly dating them sometimes. No women actively desires to date a selfish git who will treat them like crap. The ideal is a genuinely nice guy who has self-confidence.
You are spot on that a guy friend suddenly confessing that he's interested in a girl is a huge turn off, if it wasn't a flirty friendship to begin with, for the exact reasons you describe. It seems both weak and creepy. The guy is demonstrating that he didn't have the guts to make his interest known by flirting with you from the outset (weak) and he's been pretending to be a platonic friend for x number of months (creepy). Guys are better off letting their intentions be known from the get-go. Even if the girl shoots him down, she'll have more respect for him for having the confidence to do it and is more likely to reconsider than if he waits and confesses later.
You are also right that a guy doing ridiculously over the top favours (when he is not actually dating the girl) will do nothing to help his prospects with her -- it just screams pushover and "I haven't got the guts to actually ask you out".

[guy532]

Yea a lot of guys believe that women only go for assholes when my experience has completely proven the opposite.

[abacaxi84]

I see that 3 guys down voted me. It seems the truth hurts. It's pretty much the equivalent of sticking your fingers in your ear going "lalala".
Pretty much every WOMAN who has posted in response to your take has said that you are spot on, and that's because you are.

[guy532]

Haha yea I knew there were going to be guys who wouldn't agree with what I posted and it's fine, it doesn't chnage the fact that it's all true whether they like it or not. Hopefully they realise this if they're making the same mistakes.

[vmw2008]

I rarely comment on a mytake, but this is the most well written and accurate explanation for the nice guy vs asshole conundrum. What you wrote is exactly how women feel, what we're looking for, and why it seems like we don't want "nice guys" when we actually do! The confidence, flirting, showing interest AND being a nice guy is the lethal (in a good way) combination.

I just recently ended things after a few dates with a "nice guy" because of these exact things you mentioned. He was very sweet and should've been perfect for me on paper, but after a few dates, I could. not. get the attraction with him. Kissing was difficult, and he was a hottie! I realized later it was because of the things you mentioned. He never flirted. He never said he was attracted to me. I think he said he liked me one time. The majority of it was just friendly banter, mixed with a lot of awkward moments due to his shyness.

Long tangent aside, really well done. I don't think I could've explained it better. You seem to get women better than I could verbalize lol

[guy532]

Thank you for the kind words :), I greatly appreciate it! I just thought this needed to be typed out on here since it's a topic that always seems to pop up. Plus I do want to help out the nice guys that always seemed to get friendzoned because they are good guys, but just terrible at showing their romantic side. I hope you find a guy that sweeps you off your feet. Best of luck ;)

[emmabee11]

There is no such thing as a "nice guy" or even a "nice person" i even used to call myself a "good person" but now i realize why people never trusted me when i said that, it's your actions and the things you say that make you who you are and that you stay true to yourself and not let others pressure you, but in the world we live in it's fully of bad "ideals" and peer-pressurs... so... hardy anyone ever stays true to themsevles... and there a bunch of pansy guys walking around these days who beieve everything the media says just like a lot of girls, they think being "pretty" on the outside being being "pretty" on the inside... but quite honestly their personalities suck... and the guys think they are "nice" by assuming every girl likes like the same type of guy then goes balistic when we reject them because we don't lol... hardly a "nice guy" there eh? :P it's your stengh of character, i like intellegent guys who are confident and secure in themselves to make their own choices and that don't listen to others and i will never settle for anything less.

[guy532]

Yes! That's so true! Some of these guys are so vanilla because they're too afraid to make some noise, most women don't want vanilla they want rock road. I like to think of it as a pile of wood and fire. Guys that always want to please everyone and are too afraid to take risks are just a boring pile of wood. What they need is to be lit on fire. Fire glows and provides you with warmth and comfort when you stand at the right distance, but will burn you if you get close and threaten it. Walk far away and you can still see it glowing far out into the distance, not to be forgotten.

[guy532]

*rocky road*

[The_Empty]

Finally, there are no such things as nice people, which is why every single human including myself should die, just die

[emmabee11]

Yes! exactly! we want a solid foundation, we don't want to have to constantly fight you to get soem kind of real cooperation from you, we need cooperative guys because us girls are very cooperative when it comes to love, we put so much into it to make sure we are communicating to each other, we want a guy who can show us how he feels and we want him to be able to withstand anything that's thrown at us and doesn't easily scare, most guys easily scare. For girls it's genetic to want to be with a guy long-term, we like to bond so if the guy wants to be easily scared away and fights with us even about a simple question then what use is he?

[Tanuron]

This isent exactly what I think about when it comes to the whole nice guy thing, but no doubt this is true in many cases, although I think you started to get more into it at the end of your post. Which yes, a good post and something that must be said. But like take for example assholes again, they honestly have zero confidence and it can be so painfully obvious sometimes too, but many women or people in general really mistake their behavior as confidence. I think there are many layers to all of it, but I do think that many nice guys would say that women dont want nice guys is cause the nice guy can see the obviousness of the asshole that is either pretending to be a nice guy or is simply just an asshole. So they see women that in their mind are simply just assholes while women may see them as something else, and eventually tho these women would realise this person was an asshole. But instead of choosing someone a nice guy knew was nice or yes (him) it just reinforces that women dont want a nice guy.

I know with my sister for example who has had some unlucky relationships. To me from the beginning it was painfully obvious that these dudes was kind of assholes, one painfully obvious asshole and one who pretended to be a nice guy who was better at the whole pretending part. So from my point view of, she went for the bad guy rather than someone I thought for example was nice. I have of course no right to dictate or control my sisters lovelife naturally. But its one simple observation of it all anyway.

[guy532]

I wanted this mytake to be more focused on why the typical nice guy gets friendzoned basically and what he does wrong. I only went into the whole asshole thing because I thought it was necessary to tie everything together.

[Tanuron]

Understandable and fair enough too, although in general I find the whole "freindzone" thing to be just silly. Just dont see the prob with being friends with people. But yeah gotcha :):

[Anonymous]

I'm a nice guy and still flirty and attractive. I'm no 10/10 super hot guy but I've been called handsome and good looking by many girls. I also don't expect someone to date me just cause I'm nice to them. But it does anger me when I talk to a girl and she stops talking to me and goes for some total jerk that ends up leaving her at a bar and then ends up calling me up at 2 am to come pick her up. Or the guy who takes advantage of her and sleeps with her a couple times then dumps her. Then, yeah then I'm think wtf is wrong with you? Although, I end up deciding I wouldn't want to date that person anyhow. I'm not the unattractive usual guy we call the nice guy. I'm the good guy though and guess I've just had bad luck and gone for the wrong girls. Because it's not so much girls not going for "nice guys" but girls who go for total douchebags who just want to sleep with them and then treat them like a piece of shit. I am a little shy but with some confidence too. I flirt but move slow in fear of looking too needy or obsessive. So my problem my problem is probably the opposite. I tend to suppress needy or obsessive thoughts when I like someone. Perhaps too much.

[guy532]

I think you're just bad at flirting and hitting on women. These asshole guys (I prefer manwhores haha) you're referring to are much better at it than you because face it, they have way more experience. I have two really close friends who are manwhores and I've seen them play women countless times and it's a real eye opener, when you see guys who are truly amazing with women, they're never mean to the girls they're actually very nice to them and treat them with respect. They're just really really good at smooth talking, teasing, and knowing what she's thinking. The only reason you're referring to them as assholes is because they end up leaving the girl for someone else (yes, asshole move) because they have so many options. The point is, they're not labeled as assholes until they leave the girl. A nice guy can use their exact game and still be considered nice if he doesn't dump the girl after he's hooked up with her a couple of times. I hope that makes sense.

[LovelyDisquiet]

It could be possible she doesn't even know you're interested.

I read about a study that men usually know when a woman likes them or not, while ego-centric men believe more women like them than the women actually do.

Women, however, tend to assume the man isn't interested.

And I know for myself, I do that too. I realize now... my first love was probably in love with me too. But we never dated, because he never made a move. And I never believed he actually liked me because he was so hot and cold with his actions, so I backed off.

[Darkfairie17]

I love this take! I don't purposely date the jerks and assholes. I try to find guys who treat me nice. The problem is most guys, even jerks treat you nice in the beginning. They are really sweet and nice. This can go on for months. Then gradually the niceness doesn't come as often. Maybe the guy loses interest, maybe he's secretly seeing some other girl and is focusing all his niceness onto her, maybe he's getting what he wants so he draws back on the giving. Either way, the girl is confused because she doesn't know what is happening.

She thinks he must still like her, because he's still around and he was so nice before that maybe he's just busy. Or maybe something is on his mind, perhaps work is stressful, or maybe he's having financial or family trouble?

Meanwhile he blows hot and cold, but the hot and cold starts to become even more inconsistent.

Other guys see this and can immediately tell that the guy is a jerk or isn't interested. But the girl is attached. She developed feelings months ago and is afraid to give up this relationship because she has seen how good he can be.

Then she starts to think it might be something she is doing wrong and blames herself. This starts the destructive path, maybe the couple starts to argue, maybe they don't spend as much time together?

I've been through this so many times. Trying to find nice guys is not so easy. It's very hard because everyone can put on a nice face and pretend. They let people get attached and then they bring out their true selves. Once you are attached it's hard to let go.

[guy532]

Exactly that's 100% true! The hardest part is always letting go of someone that made you so crazy about them to begin with. That's why it's the little signs that matter most.

[Darkfairie17]

So true!

[thegirlnextdoorxx]

I'll tell you guys, right now: the reason why we don't date nice guys is that we may not be attracted to you. And if we wouldn't go out with you a second time, that's because we didn't get along. So it's simple.. and I don't care if you think you're nice and thereby good enough. I would be friends if a guy is nice/ sweet/ friendly but for romance, you'll have to (at the bare minimum) be attractive to me. For a relationship you'll have to be ATTRACTIVE, NICE and we'll have to GET ALONG. That's it.

[guy532]

Yes, so true! I remember when I wasn't doing well when I first started dating, I just concentrated on what I was doing wrong and improved. Now it's almost too easy. People in general need to set their egos aside and stop being so self entitled if they want to improve at something.

[lumos]

Amazing, thank you for this. This is basically what I've been trying to tell "nice guys" for years on here, every single sentence.
This little tweet here basically sums up the nice guy mentality and why it's so stupid.
40.media.tumblr.com/.../...trQ7vY1r6r32ho1_540.jpg

[RachelBrigs]

That tweet 😂😂😂

[guy532]

Yea self entitlement is another problem haha

[IamNuts]

You sir, are a genius... Couldn't have said it better myself
static.comicvine.com/.../...6-5853276471-give-.jpg

[guy532]

Thanks :)

[Anonymous]

Sorry but I don't avoid the nice guys. What you have mainly spoken about is the men who moan when they are fictionally friendzoned. You want a girlfriend, you like us? make your intentions clear in the beginning because once we know you as a friend and know all your secrets in a way that is not 'can i still have a future with him even though his secret is quite insane?' way then you are out of there. Once you are our friend you lose boyfriend potential plain and simple because it ends up where we feel like our brother is asking us out.

the guys you are referring to as 'assholes' do have the confidence, they ask us out straight away so we date them and find out they are assholes and usually dump them. (Well I do).

So instead of trying to be our best friend first, don;t become ridiculously dependable without having at least kissed us first. That will always friendzone you.

[guy532]

Yea that's exactly who this was aimed at, the nice guys who think just being a girl's friend will automatically make them their boyfriend after spending x amount of time with her and doing x amount of nice things. The best way for relationships to start is by making your intentions clear from the start.

[Opinion Owner]

it just annoys us when you get a guy who says 'but i did this for you' and you are thinking 'but I never asked you to or even hinted at it. Don;t make me feel guilty when they were your decisions...

We get branded as bitches and its not fair :(

[Anonymous]

This was a really good take, well done!

Being nice is just a basic trait of a tolerable human being, it's not a big accomplishment. If that is all you have to offer, then why on earth should she go out with you, when there are so many guys who are nice plus the hell of a lot extra.
Imagine a pizza, being "nice" is the bread and crust, but whitout all the topping, it's just fucking bread, boring, plain, bread. If said bread chooses to whine and get bitter, when the girl won't fuck him then too, then it just adds to this whole pile of horribleness.

[guy532]

Thank you! Being nice is probably on of, if not, the most common personality trait.

[Tormentarian]

If you want to be an adult and be responsible just dont run into any woman, find that one that relates to your needs and vice versa. A lot is lost especially among men following these nice guy, good guy dont does... Just be you just like how you came on this earth and are going to leave. Point is find someone who you can build with out of society and not built into society, simpleees. Want a good marriage and steady life full of travelling abroad, do know your character not of others perspectives such as this headline... bye

[bloodmountain1990]

I agree with this, while there's no such thing as a perfect woman or man for that matter, it won't work out if there's no physical attraction or if there's no common interests. I mean the girl doesn't have to be the most gorgeous girl out there nor does she have to share every common interest/viewpoint but I don't think it's too much to ask for to have a little of both.

[guy532]

Yea that's true, you should always be yourself, but you get much further if you're the best version of yourself. How are you supposed to get the woman you want if you're making major easily fixed mistakes? This isn't supposed to be a guide for nice guys on how to win over the girl they like or anything like that, it's only meant to highlight the major reasons why nice guys are so commonly rejected. What they do with that information is up to them. Whether these guys want to believe this list or not it doesn't make it any less true.

[OpenWine]

Nice guy here with flirt lack, it's hard for me to say some nice words as I think myself as a creep then.

Other than that I know just being nice is not bringing you anywhere but certainly I am not a buttlicker (which also could make me stop showing interest) and when a girl doesn't seem that she is interested in me I say babay (maybe one more try ok :) ).

I guess I might try flirting on that last girl I am looking for, at least she could be a good test subject cause if she creeps out there's bigger fish out there

[guy532]

Don't worry about creeping girl's out, you'd have to say something ridiculous and inappropriate to do so. Here's some advice I wish I knew when I was younger. Lets face it, almost all of the women you were interested in, you knew you were interested from the very beginning. It's rare to know someone for a long time then suddenly thinking "I like her". That only happens if siad person has changed. So first thing is first, show your interest from the very beginning. Start with small compliments, girls go absolutely craaazy over compliments. She said something funny? Tell her that you think she's funny. Do you like her dress? Tell her you like her dress. Does she seem happy and energetic that day or when she's around you? Tell her she's a great person. Most importantly give ger GENUINE compliments, girls know the moment you give a bs compliment and that's when they think you're creepy. Next is talk about other girls that you find atractive, I know that sounds counterintuitive but it

[guy532]

works wonders. You want the girl you're chasing to know that you're a sexual person with desires, do you know how many women think their best guy friends are gay? Obviously you don't make it sound weird when you say stuff like that and you don't make the focus of it on how you find x girl super hot. If she mentions someone you know that you think is pretty, make a comment that you think she's pretty. If you think she got jealous from it, good you can use it even more to you're advantage and say you think she's prettier. Talk about other girls that were or are interested in you if the topic comes up, she'll think to herself what do you have that these girls have seen in you? So now lets say you've done all that and now you're pretty sure she's into you and she's always smiling when you give her a small compliment or even when you say terrible jokes, what you do next is escalate. If you haven't asked her out already, do it. If she says yes (which she should if you've done everything

[guy532]

right) let her know that you find her to be an amazing beautiful women. Tell her, trust me she wants to hear it. I forgot to mention if she's taking well to your compliments to begin with you start with light touches too. Start out with a slight tap on her elbow when you want to make a point and the light touches become more and more frequent until you're on your date and she starts touching your arm back when she wants to tell you something or she'll start walking really close to you and accidentally bumping into you. Those are all signs that she feels really close to you. That's when you tell her you're having an awesome time and she's such a fun person and beautiful, never forget beautiful and then you go for the kiss. Then you walk arm in arm and keep doing what you're doing. That's the hump/hardest part of getting a woman i terested. Point is try to be as natural as possible and have fun. If you're not having fun she isn't either. Show her respect and appreciation and thot shy

[guy532]

and that you're not shy about letting her know what you think about her. The funny thing is most guys know what to say and what not to say or do, but they don't because they get nervous and scared. Trust your instincts, if it weren't for them none of your ancestors would have gotten together.

[OpenWine]

As soon as I get into the relationship/dating I become like that lol. That's some good realistic advice I can even approve by old observations.

Could that be the reason why there are boys who only want sex from girls? I mean I already think about not being myself like that. My personality defines of a hidden treasure but I will try it, I like experimenting. (I can't be a player lol, I suck at telling girls I don't find stunning that they look good)

[OpenWine]

Be doin dat, just don't have the brain to properly reply you. Hard day time to play skyrim

[Zeroize]

I consciously choose to date the shyer, more reserved guy. I'm usually approached by the stereotypical football star, wrestling jock, or weightlifting buff that many girls erroneously find attractive. Unfortunately for them, I get a good enough grasp of their personality on first impressions. I prefer nice, "less attractive" guys, not due in any part to lowering my standards, but because these are the ones I'm comfortable with, ones I can hold stimulating conversations with similar interests. These are the guys I find most attractive.

[guy532]

There's no right or wrong on who you find the most appealing, whatever suits you best is the best.

[JustinX9]

Too bad a girl like you is hard to find

[skykidx1]

Being a nice guy in no way means you lack confidence or your a push over, their is a difference between a nice guy and a guy that is only being nice for sex or to get a girlfriend. I myself am a nice respectful guy because that's how I was raised to treated everyone I meet not just women with respect. That being a said if any girl or guy disrespect in any kind of way shit will go from zero to 100 real fucking fast. But no matter what happen or what I say to you it will be said n done in a respectful way.

[Applefan1]

This is the truth of the matter "nice guy" is taken the wrong way it does not automatically mean a person is a looser. I am a nice person and respect other people, that was also how I was raised. Being a push over etc is different. This seems to be something many girls can't see the difference between.

[guy532]

Yes! I 100% agree with you and that's the definition of a man. A nice guy is just nice that's it. The best combination is to be a nice person, but to also have confidence in yourself and not being shy towards women that you're interested in.

[wom727]

this guy is a bastard freak mother fucker !! this is the guy who raped my friend and beat her up this guy is a piece of shit !! stalking son of a bastard.. he changes colors in public and private.. he beats women up in private abuses them, goes to prostitute and shows a different face in public.. he has broken into my accounts and stalking me !! this mother fucker also messaged my friends bastard !! he will go to jail soon this bastard !!

[guy532]

@wom727 welp I guess that explains the 0-100 real fast, just noticed that. If he is the type of person you say he is, I hope justice is served.

[kambo_trick3y]

This takes legit deserves to be not only promoted, but stickied to the top of the GAG newsfeed forever.

This was an excellent, and very much needed truth pill that the GAG community needs to take my friend.

10 thumbs up.

[guy532]

Thank you so much man! That's one of the nicest compliments I've ever gotten on here. It means a lot!!

[evenlift]

Unfortunately, this tired, old political correctness is helping no one. I have provided factual correctness with my myTake on the matter: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a22747-women-need-to-stop-whining-about-nice-guys

[guy532]

The funny thing is your mytake was the last straw and was the reason I wrote this mytake, so thank you!

[evenlift]

LOL.

[GreatnessPersonified]

1 and 2 are off, 3 and 4 should be the top reason!!
1. Some girls won't date a guy because she's not attracted to him. Others might.
2. Mismatched personalities have not stopped some people from f**king!!

You could add one more.
5. "Nice guy" is not really nice. The "nice guy" is really a scum bag looking to get laid via showering gifts and shit. Then, gets mad when she's not fucking him after he spent $1000 on her. *smh*

[skykidx1]

Facts the real nice guy wouldn't get mad

[Shyguy_1988]

I am just tired of the whole nice guy bad boy generalization all together. Its non sense. A girl knows what she wants notmally and knows what she is attracted to. I've known guys that think they are the nice guy but in reality a complete shitbag because they want everything handed to them on a silver platter like they deserve something for being nice. I'm nice because its part of my character and who I am, not because I want something.