No, Ladies, Men Are NOT Intimidated By Intelligence!

No, ladies, men are NOT intimidated by intelligence.

This topic has been floating around GAG recently and it both baffles and annoys me to see just how delusional some women are.

We've all seen it before: girl goes on a date, gets rejected, then proceeds to list her academic and/or career achievements without even considering the possibility that a myriad of other reasons could have made the guy run for the hills and asks whether guys are scared of her uber smarts.

Yep, that's right. After countless rejections they stew in their bitterness until eventually coming to the conclusion that it must be because they're ultra smart and that "the man's ego can't handle it".

If you were truly as intelligent as you claim to be, you would possess this grand thing called common sense and realise that there are countless other things your date could have disliked about you starting from your looks to not liking your entire personality.

Only an incredibly self-absorbed woman could ever come to the conclusion that men dislike her for a good and highly desirable quality.

I could never date her, she's so smart and amazing! My teeny weeny weenie cannot handle her genius, I am not worthy of this brilliant maiden! -falls on face in awe!

This is how you come across. Like an egotistical self-centered princess who cannot handle the possibility she's not god's gift to mankind. That maybe, just maybe he didn't like your attitude or how you carry yourself or your ideologies didn't align or your moralities didn't match or there was simply no chemistry whatsoever.

Unfortunately, you're so far up your own arsehole, you can't seem to see past the breakfast you ate this morning before typing up your circle jerk fest of a question so other women just like yourself could come and stroke your fragile ego even more, telling you how fantastic you are, patting each other on the back for being oh so great.

By claiming that men aren't attracted to you because of intelligence what you're really confirming to everyone is that you're:

  • Conceited
  • Delusional
  • Short sighted
  • Bitter
  • Full of shit

A truly brilliant woman would understand that she can't be liked by everyone due to diversity in tastes for both looks and personality. A truly brilliant woman will look back at the previous night and assess how she may have come across to see if maybe a change would be benefitial for the future. A truly brilliant woman will pose her question by describing the whole night requesting feedback on what could have gone wrong instead of asking whether her magnanimous brain scared away the man.


If you genuinely believe men are intimidated by intelligent women, you are far from being one.


The truth of the matter is men absolutely adore intelligent women. Being able to hold a stimulating conversation on a number of subjects, show considerable knowldege and ability to form logical arguments is one of the biggest turn ons men have for women, right after being physically attractive.

If you're both beautiful and actually intelligent, men will fall over each other for the chance to win your heart. Beauty + intelligence = holy grail of the dating world.

"An intellectual is someone whose mind watches itself."
- Albert Camus

An intelligent person first and foremost is self aware. They are critical of themselves and will fully comprehend why some of their qualities could have been seen as unappealing instead of confining themselves to a box of delusion and self worship.

While I'm sure men who are intimidated by intelligence do exist, they are far and few in between and are usually on the lower end of the intellectual bar, which shouldn't really concern you, since you would undoubtedly wouldn't want to be with an ignorant person in the first place, right?

Why would you be upset over being rejected by someone you deemed inferior?

Most likely because your date was actually up to your standard and it crushed you to find out you were not up to theirs.

"There's nothing like rejection to make you do an inventory of yourself."
- James Lee Burke


Inb4:

"You're a misogynist!"

"You hate yourself."

"You're only saying that to score brownie points with the guys."


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What Guys Said 48

  • Woah. Here I thought women were already intellectually superior to men. I'd know. My mom's never wrong. Hahaha.

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  • I mean if you put three women in a room i think at first the guys will go the dumb helpless girl who makes doe eyed faces at him as he does her work for her. over time however i think he'd get bored and end up with the most intelligent girl stopping in between for the mix.

    being an intelligent woman you just have to play a different game and be a bit more patient...

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    • An intelligent woman would already know this and wouldn't whine about her apparent smarts scaring guys away. ;)

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    • Oh, I don't disagree with your statement, it makes perfect sense. I'm just adding to the bit about playing a different game. :)

    • lol you have a good way of making intelligence cute instead of condescending THIS is what you should be teaching your smart sisters!

  • A lot of guys are intimidated by intelligent women, yes, but rarely then do they manage to summon the courage to try to ask them out.

    Isn't it a contradiction in terms to say a guy who is going out with you is intimidated by your intelligence? Wouldn't he be out with some not-so-darn-smart date?

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  • If a woman thinks all the men are intimidated by her intelligence, it's probably because she is manly. And we aren't necessarily intimidated by a woman being manly, we just aren't attracted to it.

    There, I said it.

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    • Don't really see a link between being smart and being manly. :B

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    • @MimTcgraw dude that's hot lol

    • Yeah I wonder how a man could handle something so hot yet so intimidating! lol

  • Oh boy this is great :D

    I'll try to save it for the future and hope it works, @Mesonfielde

    To be honest, if there's one reason to feel intimated, it's that "She's so cool, am I up to her standards?" but that's more awe than flat-out rejection. Rejecting someone for the specific reason of being a great person just doesn't make sense!

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    • Aw, you used to be able to mention yourself. They "fixed" that I guess.

      Can you put a mention of me here as a comment please? :D

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    • I must be blind but I certainly don't see it.

    • I just checked on another take and you're right, it's not there. Damn.😕

  • THANK YOU finally someone said what needed to be said, good mytake I whole heartily agree, also kudos on using Sinatra, nice touch.

    I personally love intelligent women because I'm the kind of guy that likes to be challenged and stimulated not only physically but also mentally I like to discuss things like art, history, politics all of that kind of stuff so if a lady is intelligent and can actually talk to me about these kinds of things then that is a plus in my book.

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    • Heh, thanks. And I agree, I think having that quality is a big plus for both parties. ☺

    • You're welcome lol, and I agree, I mean both parties can only prosper with it right?

  • Intelligence is intimidating in the good way. It's like when you're being interviewed for the best job, the one you truly want. You're intimidated by it, but you're super excited and you want it with all your heart.
    No guy, I repeat, NO GUY, will reject a woman because she's intelligent. I'd like to know how many women have been told their intelligence was the reason to never date her again.
    Women who believe that clearly have a lack of intelligence, and they don't wanna admit their conceitedness and "stick-up-their-asholeness" was the reason why the guy decided to never talk to them again.

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    • Nice take, by the way ;)

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    • Well, you know I usually agree to your posts. Well said man.

    • @Humping_Tornadoes Thanks man ;)

  • No I want them to be smart as they can be. I need to be mentally stimulated

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  • Bravo bravo

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  • I wish I could actually find someone smarter than me.

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  • I want a female who is intelligent, one who has class and dignity, a sense of humor, and at least a decent standard of physical attractiveness

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  • Really cool take, i like 👍

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  • i am... or maybe i'm just into less bitchy girls

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  • Intelligence is hot in women! ❤️
    Cool computer/brain pic, by the way. lol

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  • I actually prefer intelligent girls, but some men are just... conservative, that's why they feel intimidated if a woman is smarter than they are.

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  • I will only go out with girls who are as smart or smarter than I am. I want to be able to have debates with her about world issues or morals, or discussions on science and history. I don't want a girl who just agrees with the opinions of others, I want one who makes her own. In short, I feel that dating a smart girl adds another level to the relationship that I find desirable.

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    • That essentially is what my relationship is like and I couldn't be happier.👍

    • I've been in a few like that, and a few not. It has been enough to tell me that that type of relationship is the only one I want.

  • Nice take. I actually love smart women but almost always those women have a sense of entitlement than i just can't bear. So most often i chose women with other qualities other than intelligence.

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  • Excellent take @MaskedSanity ( .. standing ovation ) "The truth of the matter is men absolutely adore intelligent women "... Correct , a woman would NOT select a man with clearly inferior traits & genes , so why would a man select a vapid , braindead bimbo. It is a snarly, egotistical , superior attitude that repels men.

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  • As a sapiosexual I seek the intelligent woman

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  • I get the point you're trying to make, I really do, but I also get that you expect these "self-centered and egoistical" women to just hide their successes and just smile and look pretty (that way she won't make the guy run off) but hiding your triumphs, just to retain a guy/girl, just to be safe and not come off as cocky... isn't right.

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    • One doesn't need to hide their success, no. But turning up to a date and spending most of the night praising oneself is ridiculous.

      You can share your accomplishments without being stuck up about it.

      Humbleness goes a long way.

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What Girls Said 21

  • yeah I've never understood women who think that way. they gotta get over themselves.
    good take.

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  • Ha Haha Haha this was funny.

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  • The truth!! 👌

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  • I don't agree with this post. I find that most men are highly intimidated by very intelligent women. They never know what topic will stimulate the female. They tried to show their intelligence in an area that does not require intelligence. Music dancing modern culture all our bullshit and not indicative of someone's intelligence. I don't go out with guys who are not intelligent but that judgment is made by me. If a guy starts a conversation with me I asked him if he knows what's going on in the world does he read a newspaper. If he doesn't know current events, he's an idiot. And believe me there are a lot of idiots out there.

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    • If he doesn't know current events he is an idiot? No he isn't, he just doesn't watch the news. That doesn't make him below average in intelligence.

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    • That isn't a very intelligent way to judge people. By that measure everyone who doesn't have access to a newspaper is not intelligent.

    • @Unhappy_Sock you take my words and twist them out of context. I'm not speaking of people in the jungle. I am speaking of people I potentially might date or might interact in some kind of social or academic context. Please read the initial question. If you find you can generalize the answer, then go ahead you are doing a great job. It is a very intelligent way of evaluating an individual, appeared to enjoy being inflammatory. I do not wish to participate any further.

  • They are book smart but not socially intelligent enough to determine why the guys rejected them... 😝

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  • ( -_-) What are you trying to prove when you're title is already misleading with "men are not intimidated by intelligence" because indeed they are.. and many other people vice versa are intimidated by intelligence. Intelligence is like the holy grail because it can empower other traits like humor, etc. And if I go on a date with a guy and he runs for the hills, i'm pretty sure women don't back themselves up with "BUT I'M SMART WTF" or the opposite "But I totally acted stupid, isn't that what guys like :-((?" (Well lets admit it, some do.) But the first thing I would go to is like "Oh shit, does my breath smell" or "Did I not meet his beauty standards" etc etc.
    And yasss, R. I. P Frank Sinatra my #MCM

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    • you're 15, thats all im saying

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    • aw... girl! I support ya! I know what it feels like !

    • The down votes are overwhelming me! My points are valid D: And yass, we've all been there lmao @apple24

  • Great mytake
    Don't forgot about those women who also assume that if a guy does not like them, it is because they only go for sluts

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  • Nice. So very nice.

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  • actually a lotto guys say they dont like intelligent womwen. not that they are intimidated (bc men dont get intimidated ;p) but they just dont find it attractive. then they make excuses.

    its too manly-bc women are naturally dumb.

    it means shoes assertive-which is bad bc then she won't be a slave.

    she's too opinionated- thats bad bc it is hard to control any opinionated person.

    men comp up with a lot of incredibly sexist issues with female intelligence... like 'its not natural. she can be sort of smart but men have to be smarter.,

    im sire many women who blame rejection n intelligence could be wrong. doesn't men women dont get rejected for being smart, or that guys dont feel entitled t be made to feel smarter than the woman, even if he's not, in reality fortunate to actually be, smarter.

    dating advice warns women about coming across too intelligent or competent least the guy be made to feel unmanly... as if incompatence and idiocy are traits of the female sex.

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  • This was pretty good. It had a whole lot of truth to it.

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  • My boyfriend asked me to keep my smart mouth shut when I told him that switching between multiple applications so frequently can slow his system down!! I am afraid of this guy.

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    • why are you dating him?

    • @Azara Because he said he was just joking. I dont know if it was a Faux pass!! I am just giving another chance. If it is still the same. I move on.

  • Well dimwit, tell that to 98% of men who are sexist

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    • ^ Found one.

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    • Please lol. You should be saying that about yourself. you're sad. you're a sexist, you kiss men ass, and you obviously dont love yourself. you're a sad case girl. Your 27, you should love yourself already. Men won't kiss your ass back because most only care about themselves and love sleeping around. I feel sorry for you though lol

    • It seems persistently spouting idiocy is a hobby of yours. : D

  • Ok, well, point semi taken (no self worship or similar by the way God forbid!). I just want to say - my Ivy League fellow student told me I was intimidating for that specific reason that you say doesn't exist. And I'm sorry that I come across as, apparently, a conceited jerk - but I've struggled for years with guys acting like they really care but never exactly making a move, and the only conclusion people can come to is that it *is* my credentials etc. (thank God for those). Maybe I do appear manly as that one person mentioned, or maybe they think I want someone higher-achieving. I don't know. But I've struggled for years and tried to improve and this is making me not want to discuss my problems with others if this is how the world sees them/me. :/

    Not looking forward to the comments but I can't just read this and not say anything.

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    • I'm glad the guys were able to clear it up for you. I have nothing else to contribute as I agree with them. 😉

    • Well I appreciate people not yelling at me - I was expecting more of a backlash. But I guess I am talking about something a little different, as people said. Thanks for the help!

  • I tend to think the statement "He's intimidated by my intelligence" is just a phrase someone came up with to self-soothe after being rejected for something that probably had absolutely NOTHING to do with intelligence.

    Getting rejected sucks. It doesn't feel nice, I know. I've been there several times. I'm there now. Guys go through this personal hell all the time. I wish these women would keep in mind, though, that he has the right to want who he wants. Ladies, if it's not you, don't sweat it. You may be the greatest thing since sliced bread, but NOT TO HIM. They shouldn't project their insecurity about rejection onto him by claiming that he's "intimidated" by their "intelligence." Anyone claiming this as a reason for him not being interested seemingly has no idea of the meaning of either intimidation or intelligence.

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  • I know the same thing but on the male side, the same! this types should meet and date and leave the rest of the people alone...

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    • also, just to add. smart people do not call themselves smart, because they are not the ones to decide if they are smart or not.

  • Completely agree with you, a lot of women can't take a rejection as 'he's just not that into you' and move on... They need to nitpick at reasons and validate themselves to protect their egos.

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  • I don't think as many intelligent people are smug assholes (though they're out there) as there are intelligent people who are boring to others who don't share their interests. I say this as an intelligent, but fairly boring person.

    For instance, I was talking to my mother the other day about a historical event I'd recently learned about and picked up that she quickly became disinterested - and she's quite brainy! Likewise, my last boyfriend was an engineer and would talk about electricity until he ran out of breath and it took some work on my part to find it as fascinating as he did.

    It's hard, because most intelligent people are bursting to share their interests, but sometimes you have to work to find middle ground of conversation topics with a date/partner and then get into the gritty details of your niche interest with an online group or a colleague, etc.

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    • I think some people of both sexes aren't socially aware enough to understand the difference between being mentally astute and socially engaging. So it confuses them and they wonder, "Why is my intelligence such a turn off?" when the real issue is not very many people share the intensity of their interests and they don't adapt accordingly.

    • I agree, this is a very valid point.

      The reason I didn't bring it up, though, is that in most of the posts these women are just boasting, then patting each other on the back in the comment section.

      Being extremely passionate about a certain subject could indeed make one come across, as you said, - boring. However, it doesn't ding in men's heads "Yep, she's a genius, better get away from her!", more like "I don't share her passion for x, the conversation is getting boring, I'm bored, she's boring, meh..."

      To assume intelligence itself is the sole perpetrator is simply ludicrous.

    • I know the type you mean. It's annoying and the attitudes are off putting. The others just notice that people seem put off by their "smart talk" but don't have the social skills to figure out why. So it seems like "intelligence = fail," rather than "too many mundane, unrelatable details = fail."

      Though, to be fair, I've heard just as many boring conversations about clothes, sports, hunting, routine child care, work, tv shows, etc for the same reason. The art of conversation seems to be dwindling and some people do just need some guidance on how to be more interesting and engaging.

  • I think everyone is intimidated by another person's intelligence if there is a huge gap. And as far as men are concerned, i don't think most men would actually ask a girl out who's much more intelligent than they are. A guy on a date with a much more intelligent women would have a hard time keeping her interested so the whole conversation and interaction would be forced and mentally straining and she'd get bored very quickly so the dislike would be mutual.

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    • This would be the case, if not for these same women venturing online going "woe is me, I get rejected all the time, must be my brains". Surely if she didn't think he was up to her standards, she wouldn't get all butthurt about it.

      Makes no sense to get upset over something you didn't like in the first place.

  • I know it's not my intelligence men are intimidated by they aren't intimidated so much as they are taken aback by my sporadic fits of subpscotic rage but in my defense well I don't got one

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  • Women and guys alike need to grasp at some reason that someone doesn't like them. For women, it is easier to think men are scared off by intelligence rather than accept that they may have an overbearing or obnoxious personality, or that the guy rejected them because for whatever reason they physically weren't appealing to him.

    Guys do the same, although they may blame their financial situation or whatever.

    To acknowledge that someone just doesn't like YOU is a hard thing for some people.

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    • Yes, that's very true. I think this is akin to when guys claim a girl doesn't like him because he's a nice guy.

      Literally the same thing, they assume they're disliked for a positive quality. /facepalm

    • Exactly!

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