There are three different types of people in the dating scene:
A) The person who is open to dating any race.
This person has no preference when it comes to dating racially. They are willing to date whoever they share a connection with.
B) The person who says,"I have a preference for my own race."
This person is unwilling to date outside of their race. Although this person is referred to as "close-minded" by some, this individual does not discriminate against others. They do not feel other races are inferior in comparison to their own. They do not associate other racial groups with the negative stigmas that are in place for them by society. They simply just share a attraction to their own phenotype or others with similar features/characteristics.
C) The person who says they have a preference but is really a closet racist.
My main discussion in this article will be Person C.
This person constantly tries to camouflage their actions. It is apparent to some that this person is racist. They often insinuate that they are better than others through their actions and words. When confronted with the fact that they are racist, they are often quick to say:
"I have a -insert race other than their own- friend"
"I have a preference, I can't be racist!"
People that are able to see past their camouflage know that isn't the truth.
Person C hides behind the words, "I have a preference" because that is what is accepted in society. The truth is, they share a deep routed hatred for the race they choose not to share a committed relationship with.
Covert racism is a form of racial discrimination that is disguised and subtle, rather than public or obvious. Concealed in the fabric of society, covert racism discriminates against individuals through often unnoticeable or seemingly passive methods. Covert, racially-biased decisions are often hidden or rationalized with an explanation that society is more willing to accept.
- May have many friends of different racial backgrounds.
- May even have a few sexual encounters with those outside of his/her race. (But would never seriously commit or marry someone that is not their own racial background).
Examples of comments that are made by this person:
"Black people are criminals and ghetto".
"Hispanics are dirty and loud".
"All Asians look alike. They are only good for submission."
"White people smell like wet dog. They are stuck up and snobby."
The list goes on.........
You can be any race to hold hatred to another.
Offensive comments as shown above are quickly covered up by the, "I have a racial preference in dating" line. Often times, the comments made by people like Person C are overlooked because no one ever second guesses when someone says they have a liking towards a particular type of person.
How can they? Especially, when this person seems to get along with a variety of ethnic groups.
I get it!
I am not easily fooled.
This is racism in its most subtle form.
It is often swept under the rug because it's concealed to look like something that is acceptable in the eyes of others.
People like Person C aren't always aware of their deeply routed hatred for other races. It's very common that some individuals feel this way about other races subconsiously. Societal, cultural, and environmental differences/beliefs have the ability to strongly impact ones views of others.
Some covert racists often remain in denial about the "truth" of their views and continue to portray an image they are opposite of.
We’ve got to face the fact that some people say you fight fire best with fire, but we say you put fire out best with water. We say you don’t fight racism with racism. We’re gonna fight racism with solidarity
Whether racism is overt (open and observable) or covert (hidden and disguised), it is something that will never end. Do not allow yourself to be blinded by those who say they have a preference. Those that truly do, harbor no hate or resentment. Those that do not make ignorant comments and portray an illusion that's appropriate for the world.