Girls, Let's Get Serious About Online Dating

Girls, Let's Get Serious About Online Dating

I have some suggestions for those who want to make the most out of online dating. Some of this may also apply to guys, and some of this is just me ranting about some pet peeves I have.

1. Profile Pictures

A) With or Without

Honestly, this is the first thing guys will notice. It can help to have one, but it's your choice if you don't want to include any pictures. I know you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, but that's what most people will look at first . Will it get people's attention and make them want to see more?

B) Accuracy/Honesty

If you do include a picture, then make sure it reflects what you look like. The only thing worse than not having a picture is having a picture of someone else. Don't hide behind someone else's image. Too much photoshopping is also a no no.

C) Thumbnail/Main Picture

Don't make it a picture of you and your friend - how are we supposed to know which one is you? Unless it's some kind of two-for-one deal...just saying, you could be giving guys the wrong impression. Also, girls why would you put up a picture of you with another guy? I've seen this a couple of times and I don't understand it.

Another pet peeve of mine is when a picture has a group (3 or more) of people. Perhaps you like to share the spotlight but online dating isn't the place for that. Also, be considerate of your friends - they may not like having their image on an online dating website, especially if they're already in a relationship.

D) Missing Parts

Sometimes you'll see pictures just of the body, without the head in the picture. Girls, if you're so much against objectification then don't do this. Sure, guys will probably look at your boobs first but then they'll look up at your face and if irl you don't have a head then they'll run away no matter how good-looking your boobs are.

Sometimes you might also see pictures of just a certain body part (ex: ass, boobs, shoulder). Great, guys love that stuff but we dates girls not body parts. You'll get our attention by doing that but you won't get us to stay.

2. Description

A) Short/Non-existent

"I don't like talking about myself."

Oh really? Would you prefer to talk all about a complete stranger?

"Just ask."

Really? We haven't even met or interacted and you're being so demanding already. No thanks.

"I don't know what to say."

"If you wanna know anything just shoot me a message."

Never hears back.

"Try to be somewhat creative with your message."

Her description is short to non-existent...give us something to work with girls. Oh, guys, I have an idea. If you come across a profile like this then make up a story about who the person is and send that in. At the end, ask them how accurate you were. If they get pissed, serves them right.

B) Intentions

Make your intentions known. If you're on an online dating website then most people will assume that you're looking for a relationship.

"No one night stands, no hook-ups, no FWBs, etc., etc."

I see this so often. If guys have any sense then they'll pursue girls who say that they're up for that stuff on their profiles. Otherwise, we'll just assume that you're looking for a relationship. So saying this kind of stuff on your profile is a waste of space and may give off a poor impression such as:

~you're too uptight/guarded


~you're so in demand that you probably don't have any time to consider me

C) Generic Description

*yawn* *moves on* *scrolls down*

Your description doesn't have to be an essay but try to be a bit more detailed. If you're passionate about something then let that show. Instead of saying you like something say why you like something. What interests you about this? If you're afraid of boring people then that's good; you're screening out people you may not hit it off with. Also, your passion will resonate with the right people and make online dating more successful for you.


It's rare to come across long descriptions but for those of you who do this then, like I said, your description doesn't have to be an essay. Save some information for later; guys like a bit of mystery. Leave some things to the imagination. You can't get to know someone if you already know them.

Last Words

Girls, if you're not detailed with your online dating profiles then you're casting the net wide and you'll bring in any ole crap. There may be someone good in there but you would be too busy weeding through the crap to find and recognize him.

It also helps to be honest and upfront. If that turns guys away then you're better off than if you had went through several dates before he realizes you're not right for him. It will save you some heartache.

If you don't do these things then you're wasting guys' time and you're wasting you're own time.


Join the discussion



What Girls Said 9

  • I don't do online dating. I have met guys that look uglier than their pictures. They use old pictures. I am convinced that really unattractive men and men with unrealistic expectations in women use online dating
    There are so many fucked up guys who use online dating that it's not even funny

    • There are a lot of fucked up guys offline too, but I guess online dating sites concentrate that portion of the population.

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    • @Serenity-chan you do what works for you

    • It was too obvious of a statement so I thought you meant only. I'm sure everyone is aware of weirdos on the internet.

  • Thry are just there to flirt but nothing serious

    • I hadn't mentioned that - thanks for pointing it out. Also, some girls may just be there for the compliments, to stroke their egos. Girls who do this make it more difficult for both guys and girls, who are actually serious, to find what they're looking for. Perhaps online dating sites where you have to pay help to screen out such people.

    • But some sites are open to all but hey its also easier to lie online

  • Quite honestly this is a good basis for everyone who might be online dating and not just women.

  • Creating a profile without a picture is like making a sandwich without bread

  • Online dating is literally just a huge waste of time one of the very sub-definitions of what is time wasting: Online dating.

    I did an experiment just what is being on a dating site. I found; freaks don't just come out at night anymore thanks to online dating they're on there all the time. Wonder why pretty girls don't talk? They're too busy getting fake and/or creepy troll motherfuckers of all shapes and sizes. It didn't matter what I put in my reasonably concise bio and my intentions were clear as day but guess who kept getting dick pics galore. Incessant video cam sex requests. Innapropriate questions about my body. Guys have a serious problem thinking the female population owes them something. God forbid you get the guy that can't handle rejection, then they go to extreme lengths of profile stalking. Then there's the picture jerk, they literally talk to you in attempt to get a picture or two even if they're clean, weirdos with little self-esteem. Once I met a reasonably nice guy who stole another guys pictures but the dumb thing was the catfish was just a gorgeous I just had a problem that he lied and started dating an unnatractive girl but he was pretty awesome. Then there's the random ghosts you can talk for months but I think they get overwhelmed confused and just ghost you just bc? Hopefully life just got real or they got depressed an actual reason maybe. The married guys with two kids and a dog that one was hella creative. The good guys are so far and few in between but by the time you may find one you've gone through so much crap and gave up thinking there's anyone worth knowing so your default setting just becomes cold and aloof turning a potentially good guy off. Then starts the vicious cycle again. Online dating=time wasting.

    • thats how most decent guys feel, the good girlfriend material girls are very few and far inbetween and we're lucky if we ever land on one like those, dating sites are a waste of time, why? cause guys use them to get laid i will never take a gir seriously if she goes online to find "love" i mean comeon !! you can find guys on the street, at work, at school it just shows you lack something if you go online looking for a boyfriend, so 80% if not more of the guys on these sites are only looking for sex, its easy, effiecent and no need to waste your time making a girlcomfy, no matter what you write in your profile they will ask you for sex regardless.

    • @CoolSky01
      Believe it or not a lot of women do look for love on them. I'm not one of them, I'm more of find a decent texting companion bc I get a little bored sometimes. It's annoying when most of them aren't grown up to even do the adult thing and ask first. Have the courtesy to put it up on their profile, only a few do. So it's literally a fucking waste of time. Stay in the just to get laid, find a date/gf, general text companion/type pal. How hard is that to ask?

  • Nice information shared , thanks ChromAzonyx108 , loved this information

  • Good my take 👌

  • Online dating? where can I find a good site? lol I want to try and make this my guidelines.

    • I've tried PlentyOfFish (POF) a couple of times but it was fruitless. I briefly tried OKCupid but I just didn't like that site much. If I try online dating again maybe I'll try a site where to have to pay to use it.

      Also, why try online dating sites? I'm right here :P

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    • I'll check it out. lol and what about you again? loooollooool XD

    • @Soshy hows it like dating online? the idea I'd kinda, I dont know. lol

  • Perfect timing. I just started my first online profile (for dating) and was worried I'd put too much/not enough. I think I did alright, though I *did* include something on your "Don'ts" list. Hmm. Best 3 outa 4? I do still get a lot of unwanted messages from creepy guys rather than from the guys im attracted to. Advice?

    Also, are there certain sites you recommend over others? Maybe I'm on the wrong one.

    • How are the guys creepy? xD

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    • I think if you pay premium plans or something then you can block.

    • Profile updated, but I'm still not crazy about putting woo much out there. Funny to see that most of the guys are either "mute" (photo only) or super wordy about exactly what they want, etc., to the point that one might think "man, he's gonna be a picky SOB on a date."

      Is it really that hard to find a non-creepy, non-dbag guy on these sites?

What Guys Said 11

  • Loved your article, I wrote one with similar points, and I gotta say, you made son great points, good Job.

  • Why do some have on their profiles, not interested in chatting, don't respond, or some other antisocial remark, and to boot of course they're all private profiles. I mean what good is it to have an account and not use as it's intended?

  • "unless it's a two-for-one deal" - dude you totally cracked me up!! Epic remark

  • This is a great take. I like to add that when woman say "if you looking for sex on the first night, then I'm not the one you looking for." While I understand that you're not a one night stand, I believe that you had one too many one night stands and that throws a red flag.

    Also single moms, as hard as is to do, please stop saying that your kids are your world. You're implying that you're a mom first. I can respect that but if you're a mom first (as you should be), then why are you on dating sites? Not saying that you shouldn't be on dating sites but there's a place and time for that but dating sites is not one of them unless you just want hook ups.

    • Thanks. You make some good points. I do appreciate though when girls admit to having children rather than not disclosing this information as that is not something I'd like to be surprised with on a date. Even if guys are okay with single moms it may still be off-putting if you're not upfront about it.

    • I feel you on that but a lot of guys get turned off when single moms mention their kids a lot especially single men with no kids. Basically they just setting the tone on how this interaction going to be. Finding a date is like finding a job

  • If I'vs learnt anything a fair few girls aren't even there for anything but attention.
    I always see the same people online everytime I go on the apps; I usually go on once a day..
    They're either really fucking picky or they have about 20 dudes on the chain.

    I rarely get a reply and when I do the conversation is almost always being lead by me. They never show enough interest so I give up..

    I've pretty much concluded online dating is a waste of time if you're a guy. As a girl you can get whatever you damn please.

  • Ah yes, online dating. The only place where female 3s consistently score male 10s.

    • Thank you...
      Not being snobbish or egotistical, but I have been told I'm decent looking and it's a struggle to even get a ugly girl to talk to me..

      Girls, take notes. If you can't find a guy in person someone on POF or OkCupid will snap you up.

    • @Alexious Well, you can boost yourself up to the top by showing personality in your approach. That's really the only way to go online.

  • Meeting a partner online is a bit like saying, "I wanted to meet you but I didn't want to have to put effort into it. I'll just find the love of my life on the couch with a bowl of chips in my hand."

    Is there a more chickenshit way to get your pork on than match. com

    • Yuo say that now, wait until you are well into your career and a little older... It has nothing to do with confidence, I have no problem being with women, the problem is finding them. People get busy, they have to move for work and don't have much free time. I am especially unlucky in that most of my friends are older and married too.

      All I am saying, is that when you only get one or two nights off a week, don;t really live in an area with lots of younger women/ a dating scene- well then online dating don't look so bad- so don't judge what you do not know!

    • @ccp16 Hate to disappoint but there's no such thing as a worthwhile woman online. There's barely worthwhile women.

      Stay at the office and get loaded. Die in a bathtub of cash, you'll be much happier.

    • I actually meet plenty of fine women on there- just as busy with life as I am! My last girlfriend and I met on tinder even, dated for a year and wouldn't even have broken up if I didn't have to move.

      I don't really care about money at all, so long as I have what I need and enough to vacation/travel some. I just put so much into my job because I love it.

  • Some guys don't mention what they do for living That's a huge problem.

  • This is really good, I can relate to a lot of your annoyances. My biggest problem is the 'just ask' thing. I'm like ok now I can't really say anything original, there's nothing off the profile to go with.

    And with the pics, if they only show their face, they are ashamed of being fat, plus you can tell anyway cause their face is really rounded. So why hide it?

  • I am a true believer in online dating. My sister found her husband on POF. After many of dates I recently found my next wife on POF. For some of us it is the only way to really date. I hate bars and clubs, I am not religious, I work from home and I have only 1 friend I rarely see. So there are no other outlets to find any women. Tinder and POF have been best. Match sucked.

    • I haven't tried Match. Don't you have to pay for that one? And shouldn't online dating sites you have to pay for be better than ones that are free?

      I'm not knocking online dating altogether, it's just that there's a lot of crap to sift through before you hit on something good. It can take a lot of patience. You and your sister are lucky.

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    • @Bipolarjew02015 I'm also not a very good conversationalist. Unfortunately, you have to be pretty good at that to initiate and carry on conversations online, especially with stony/frigid girls who contribute very little to conversations.

    • I find it the absolute opposite. Even if your a shy guy, there is no reason to be online. You can approach any woman, regardless of how hot she is. You stick to the basics. "tell me something about you", "what kind of work do you do", "do you have kids"... etc.
      For many women, once you get them talking they do most of the work. I try and move it to texting as quickly as possible since then you can look back at things she said a lot easier and use those comments for the next question or subject. Don't be afraid to just say "Do you want to chat or don't you? you don't seem to be saying very much". If they get upset, then move on to the next woman. I can usually have a date within 2-4 days on any online forum. I learned early not to text/chat forever once you find someone your interested in. Chat just enough to confirm that you want to meet her, then ask if she wants to meet for drinks and talk more in person. you can match perfect on paper and just not have that spark when you meet.

  • Fuck dating... there is no equality for men... we are treated like SHIT

    • lol, just fuck dating altogether, online and offline eh?

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    • I thought you were exaggerating for humorous effect. It's hard to tell sometimes.

      Women tend to get put on a pedestal, perhaps even apotheosized, and guys are expected to pamper them. But to say that there is no equality for men is one-sided as women get treated like shit too.

      Men have been in power over women for centuries and I think a pendulum effect is occurring - women are trying to get their comeuppance now. This is most evident with pseudo-feminism/nazi-feminism, whatever you mind to call it.

    • You are sick in the head if you think that's funny... All brainwashed feminists are sick in the head.

      There is hardly any relationship where women are getting the shorter end of the stick. Women will not even date you if you ask for equality... are you nuts? Those women who cry that they are treated like shit are actually pampered AS FUCK. They just make false accusations like every other...

      Men are 2nd class citizens by laws and social standards. Wake up!! There is only ONE SIDED discrimination in the west and it's against men. I am not being one sided, it FACTUALLY is one sided.