Signs He Just Doesn't Care About You

Signs He Just Doesn't Care About You

Every girl will encounter this guy at some point in her life, most times more than just once.

He's perfect. He's cute, he's nice, he's got a good job. But you find out far too late that he was never really serious about you. Here are a few ways you can identify this guy.

1) He Asks You To Change Yourself

It's the little things. Shortly after you start dating he passive aggresively suggests you dye your hair, or start wearing something you usually wouldn't wear, or start wearing a different shade of lipstick.

If he doesn't like you the way you like yourself, then he doesn't like you.

2) You've Never Been Out on a Date

You've never been on a real date. You've been to his house and he's been to yours, but he avoids going out and having a sit down meal. First of all, he doesn't think you're worth the effort, and secondly, he doesn't want to be seen with you.

3) He Doesn't Want To "Label" The Relationship

He tries to convince you that being completely monogamous would ruin the relationship or that nobody needs to know because it "might tear us apart". No, he just doesn't want his sidechick (or his main chick) to find out he's sleeping with you. I clear sign of this type is when there is "no relationship info to show".

4) He Only Calls You When It's Half Past Five

You'll nver hear from this guy during the day. He only calls you at night and it's always to ask if you want to come over, not to go out.

5) He Doesn't Like Cuddling or Public Affection

If you find that the only physical affection he'll give you (aside from the obvious) is grabbing your ass and when he's trying to get you to have sex with him, he isn't actually attatched to you emotionally. If he were, he'd want everyone to know it and he'd never want to stop cuddling with you.

6) He Never Spends The Night

If he always finds an excuse to leave after you've done the business or *gasp* you wake up and realize he's not there... he doesn't care.

7) His Friends Know Who You Are...But Not in a Good Way!

If you find that every time you meet his friends they give you signs like side-eyeing each other or chuckling amongst themselves rather than being extra polite and saying something like "Oh wow I've heard so much about you! ______ never shuts up about you!" then he's probably been shredding you too pieces to his friends and not telling them how great you are.

8) You See Him Texting or With His "Ex" Girlfriend Often

Come on, this one's just obvious guys.

9) Whenever You Suggest Talking About Your Relationship, He Disappears

He doesn't want to talk about it. And no matter how much YOU want to talk about it, it's not going to affect him. If he doesn't want to discuss whether what you're doing is a relationship or not then he doesn't want it to be a relationship.

10) He Doesn't Care About Your Job Your Hobbies or Your Friends

If you find yourself talking to a brick wall every time you bring up work, your passions, or your friends, then he doesn't give a shit about them. It's easy to spot, you could be explaining something that happened at work today and he just nods accompanied by one word replies, or he never remembers what your best friends name is, no matter how many times you bring it up.

So here are a few ways to spot a guy who just doesn't care. Let me know what you think and if you have any more signs!


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What Guys Said 13

  • I agree with everything, though there are some generalizations, but overall, good take.

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  • Dear girls,

    To what is said here are all true.

    I, for one, treated my girl like this. And even I am aware I am doing this to her, it pains me everyday from what I did. I don't love her anymore but she refuses to let go. So for a long time, I treated her far less than what she really deserve. From 1 to 10 on this list... I did it all and far more worse. I regret it it the my core, but I still don't know what to do. I really don't know... she is my first.

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    • It's really sweet that you feel so bad about it, and I'm sure if you want her back you can find a way to prove to her you would never treat her like that again. I'll be rooting for you :)

  • As a general answer, you can assume your SO doesn't care about you when:
    1) She/he never ask you about your everyday life.
    2) She/he almost never send you a text message.
    3) you feel you are been sexually used.
    4) your SO don't mention future goals whit you, or a void the subject when you talk about it.
    5) your SO doesn't give a dam about how you look or your SO never feels comfortable whit your look or who you are as a person. (two extremes).

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  • I don't get 3 and 4. I don't think they apply to everyone. The rest are alright.

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    • yea, 4 is understandable for someone with a 9-5 job

    • I mean I've done 3 with someone I really cared about. In retrospect it probably would have been better not to, because maybe it did communicate the message that this OP is thinking... even though that wasn't the reality. And yeah what you said for 4.

  • #1... yet we always here about women trying to change guys...

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  • I don't care about most of these, but honestly, I am going to comment on the first 1.

    Human beings look good in certain ways. If you have certain contours on your face or a certain skin tone, you'll look better with specific hairstyles or lipstick colors. Him pointing that out doesn't mean anything, UNLESS he's trying to get you to look more like an ex, in which case, he's projecting. Otherwise, no. Giving someone tips to make them look better means you DO care

    Your lipstick and hairstyle are not WHO YOU ARE. He isn't trying to change you AS A PERSON. Please learn the distinction between who you are and what you wear. They aren't the same thing.

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    • sometimes what a person wears is a huge part of how they express themselves though

    • @thewanderingme I disagree with this. Unless we're talking about them expressing their like or dislike of certain designs or designers.

      Expression - the process of making known one's thoughts or feelings.

      Expression is most effectively done with direct communication and not a Tommy Hilfiger logo.

      Also, I have to question how the shade of lipstick is a form of expression. Are they expressing that they like that color? That's not a very complex idea to express.

  • Signs he just wants to bang you.

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  • 1-5 are at least kinda bullshit... the rest, i agree with.

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  • Definitely not true.
    -Some people don't date
    - Nothing wrong with NOT giving a label to the relationship. You both know inside you what you are , that's enough.
    -some people don't like showing affection in public
    - Can't spend night if I have to get up early next morning. Or dog is hungry at home :(

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  • I just have one question.. WHICH GIRL DECIDES TO STAY WITH SUCH AN ASSHOLE?

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    • Millions millionilloks , even ones that beat them up infringement there kiddos. I hate it dumb ass pussies

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    • I think it's unfair that when a girl immediately cuts off an asshole, people assume that she can not keep a stable relationship

      It really does seem like a lose lose for women

    • @ikissedtheskyonce no but how do you get together in the first place? Is this a confirmation of the statement that girls like assholes?

  • Just lol at 1. Just because a guy ask you to change your look or lose some weight because your getting fat implies he doen't care about you. You girls and your "Take it or leave it" mantra really shows your entitlement. Oh not to mention the hypocrisy as a lot of y'all try to domesticate your man once you get into relationship.

    Your 2) is flawed. He could just be an introvert who prefers laying back and watching a movie on netflix with you as appose to throwing 100's and winning and dinning you like a prostitute in exchange for sex.

    Again flawed. Some people just don't want to go through the BS on facebook of people knowing their love life. Especially when they've had to break up with person in past and take down their pictures.

    Again some guys have been chastised by females for so long and gone without love they don't know how to show public affection. Others just don' t like this holding hand shit and being lovey dovey. This doesn't mean they don't like you.

    "You see him texting"

    Talk about control freak. Jezuz you gonna shank me bitch for texting my sister.

    Anyway can't bother to read the rest but this take reeks of insecurity.

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  • I would say there are exceptions to rule one, but for the most part, I'd agree with this; it's the same with girls. If they act like this, then they're not interested. Even in friendship, if that's the route you want to go.

    My friends are my friends because they bothered to try to get to know me and my hobbies and interests, and I've done the same for them.

    But for the most part, many so called friends (and girlfriends) have not had any interest in who I am. After about a year and a half of singles groups, most of the girls don't really ask me anything past small talk.

    I know girls don't seem to initiate contact with guys much (or so I'm told), but I still think it's a problem when girls never initiate a call or text. I take it as a sign that if a woman doesn't do a "counteroffer" when she's genuinely busy, then it's time to move on.

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  • I checked your profile - I was really surprised to see you are 17 - So wise you have clearly marked the main red flag issues for this type of person

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What Girls Said 11

  • These are signs that the girl is a sidechick or he only wants sex

    I have met so many guys that did not give a shit about me that I can write a book on it.

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  • Definitely true... for guys AND girls.

    media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ll1sj8Mozx1qdlkgg.gif

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  • many are true but about #5 ... most guys in japan are too ashamed to kiss/touch/etc in public. some are open to it and initiate.

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  • My ex showed almost all these signs throughout our entire relationship. I knew it wasn't okay, but I tried to tough it out in the hopes that we would be okay. It isn't worth it, because in the end, you're the only one trying to make it work. It hurts, but it's better than staying and trying to make it work.

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  • Lol my future love life is gonna be like...

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  • This is so true.

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  • Doesn't work for older women.

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  • :// Wow... wish I couldn't seen something like this a few years ago. Saying it would've saved me tons of trouble is an understatement.

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  • My boyfriend who I've been with for almost 2 years (currently on a break) keeps suggesting that I grow my hair longer. Then tells me he likes it short when I say he should like it as it is.
    He told me it's so that he can pull on it during sex, like wtf?

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    • That's really selfish of him, because he just wants you to change yourself for his own enjoyment. You should wear your hair the way you feel comfortable with it.

    • Ye I'm starting to realise he's selfish with pretty much everything at the moment. If he can't see he'd hurting me by being this way ill have to try and be strong enough to walk away... :( you're right though, im not growing my hair because he dislikes it.

    • I'm really sorry to hear that girl, I know it's hard but if he isn't treating you right then this is an opportunity to find someone who will. <3

  • Number 1 is so true

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  • Most of these are true and I really wish I had ran into this take before I met some douche bags. A great take

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