If women have to stop expecting men to pay for dates, then men should have to stop seeking sexy mates

Women evolved throughout their evolutionary history to seek a mate who could be a good provider. Men evolved to seek a mate who is sexually attractive & fertile-looking.

if women have to stop expecting men to pay for dates, then men should have to stop seeking sexy mates

Therefore, if women have to stop expecting men to pay for dates, then men should have to stop seeking sexiness in mates. If women have to stop expecting a mate to appeal to their senses via providing food and entertainment, then men should have to stop expecting a mate to appeal to their visual senses.

In both cases, it's telling each gender not to do what they're wired to do due to thousands of years of evolution.


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What Guys Said 19

  • Translation: "I'm so ugly I can't get a date, please man, stop looking for sexy girls and notice my ugly self... please!"

    :*

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    • Translation [of the men who want women to stop expecting men to pay for dates]: "I'm so poor I can't get a date, please ladies, stop looking for guys who will pay for dates, and notice my broke self... please!"

    • It took you more that 13 days to come up with that? I guess you're not just ugly XD

  • Gold digger lmao

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  • Attractive != paying for a date.
    Men who pay for dates also have to be somewhat attractive anyway, so this argument makes 0 sense.

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  • Having money and being a good provider are two different things. Sure having money may help in the providing sense. But are you saying women are attracted to only men with money. If that were the case then women would be flooding Warren Buffet's doorstep. And there are a lot more factors to attraction for both men and women than the ones you mentioned.

    Also paying on a date is an act which doesn't really signify anything to do with a man's ability to provide. Its a polite gesture more than anything and he can easily make you pay for a date even tho he is more than capable of providing that. Its give and take not a solidified indication of what you call attraction.

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  • You sound like a high maintenance woman to deal with anyway.

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  • By your logic, if I take you to a really fancy restaurant and I ask you to wear something sexually attractive and fertile looking, you'd have no problem with that?

    So how many of these do you have in your wardrobe?
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...0f4850022c.jpg
    uberhumor.com/.../Juv68zo.jpg
    i.warosu.org/.../1424589659459.jpg
    http://i.imgur.com/LsN6Vo6.jpg
    s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/.../...3da682acc8.jpg
    cdn1.theodysseyonline.com/.../...0169_cortland.jpg

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  • What the fuck. It is women who go for looks in men. And why should us men allow women to treat us as some cash machine.

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  • Well the thing that bothers me the most about paying for dates is knowing that the same girl who is expecting me to pay to take her on dates for months has likely sent nudes, given blow-jobs, and had sex with guys who never had to spend a dime on her.

    I'd much rather be one of those guys. So if a girl doesn't see me as good enough to have sex with without expecting to be wined and dined then I am just not interested.

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  • Female praying mantises are biologically programmed to eat the male during the mating act. Biology isn't synonymous with fair and we act against out biology all the time, it's called civility.

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    • So, we should now expect men to not care so much about looks in partners?

    • That's what they're doing when they aren't paying for you, they're valuing a woman's personality for not taking advantage of them.

  • Your argument is its acceptable to think this because were biologically programmed to do it. Socially accepting one biological need means accepting another, rejecting one means rejecting another.

    Lets suppose your claim is right. In this case were assuming guys have to pay for meals if they want to get an attractive girl, if they dont have to pay then they shouldn't expect to get attractive girls. All because they are evolutionary and biological functions.

    Do you know what else is a biological & evolutionary function? Females being picky about who they have sex with and get in relationships with because they have a limited number of eggs to pass their genes to their offspring. Males have and want many sexual partners because they have an abundance of sperm throughout their lifetime to pass on their genes and the females are choosey about their mates. Its biologically programmed for guys to want many sexual partners instead of planning to stick to one to have their offspring with. "If" a guy has a desire to cheat with another woman, it's a biological & evolutionary need. Just like a girl wanting a guy to pay for all meals, because she wants a provider.

    If your argument is correct, then girls who want guys to "provide" for her because its a biological & evolutionary function, should also be fine with the guys she's involved with to have sex with other women while they're together and him having 50-100 sexual partners before her. This is true according to your claim, because its an evolutionary need thats been programmed in the males brain for thousands of years.

    If you believe women shouldn't be okay with their boyfriend cheating or having sex with 50-100 girls before her, then your argument is false, because if his evolutionary need isn't unanimously accepted, then the woman's evolutionary need for a provider isn't accepted anymore than the man's many sexual partners and acts of cheating if they desire them.

    This is your claim is it not? You have to accept all rules and definitions your claim makes. This is just one example, I can easily give you more.

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    • The equivalent to men cheating is women cheating. women are wired to cheat too but the difference is that men are wired to go after quantity while women are wired to go after quality.

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    • Well, are you willing to stop expecting potential dates to be beautiful?

    • They dont care, they know i dont have money. Every girl i offered to pay or paid for the date felt uncomfortable about it. They felt like they owed me.

      And by sticking to your main argument, you are also saying your okay with your boyfriends cheating on you and having huge amounts of sexual partners before you, its the same logic isn't it? You do know that?

  • That's... A pretty good argument. So who's going to go first?

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  • ya because a guy laying down a few bucks for your supper shows you that he has a couple of extra bucks. That says nothing about his desire or ability to provide. Most men know that's it's expected of them so they pay whether they like it or not. So that dosen't show you anything.
    Guess you will actually have to get to know him to tell if he can be a good provider.
    -Also there is a big difference between a guy beating able to provide what is needed in life and greed. Most women pass up good providers for greed mistakingly thinking that more is better. It is not.
    -also if this is the way you want it you better remain sexually attractive for life- none of this turning 30 and going downhill. I can't stop being a provider at 30 so you can't stop being hot. Same with having kids- if your body looses its luster after a kid than according to the direct trade, your ass is dumped. Again I'm expected to continue providing.
    But of course there are plenty of hot women who do take pride in standing on their own who don't want to be indebted or expected to pony-up their side of the deal, who realize the guy paying for a meal doesn't show you anything about his ability to provide, that I can date, and laugh at your cheap ass for being stuck in the 40s.

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  • No one is stopping you from letting yourself go. Just see what kind of guys show up at your door then.

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  • you want to say we pay for sexy ladies? you want to say girls sell?

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  • Or, ya know, both people could bring their A game in the sexxxxayyyy department and also contribute financially to joint entertainment and shared experiences.

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  • so are you trying to tell me that women don't care about looks at all, and only how wealthy a guy is? bullshit.

    they care about both

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  • "Women evolved throughout their evolutionary history to seek a mate who could be a good provider. Men evolved to seek a mate who is sexually attractive & fertile-looking."

    Prove it with scholarly peer reviewed articles, then we will talk

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  • And your argument has zero validity since guys are increasingly expected to groom and manscape themselves for their partners in this day and age. We're not just hairy Neanderthals stinking of BO chasing a girl to propagate the species. We have added responsibilities to please our sexual partners and so do women.

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    • but they things for free cause they that privilege cause their princesses

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    • Women do the same to men.

What Girls Said 6

  • My boyfriend paid for me every time we went out to eat, occasionally he'd have me get the tip or buy him coffee or dessert later if I felt like evening the score a little.
    He enjoyed doing it and when we'd go out with couples and the man didn't pay for his date, he'd say things like "Come on, be a real man."
    He supported gender roles and that's honestly something I loved him for. He expected me to keep myself looking nice for him and wearing the clothes he and in turn he'd pay for our date, buy me things, and treat me good.
    He wasn't a dictator, and if I felt like wearing a pair of jeans and a T-shirt he wouldn't protest or tell me I should be wearing something sexier, but when we'd go to somewhere nice we would both dress accordingly.
    Honestly, I liked that attitude he had. A lot of guys don't seem to support gender roles anymore because they expect every girl to be a feminist and pave her own way. I'm not a feminist, pay for my dinner, open my doors, and drive me to dates. I'll look good for you, clean for you, cook for you and let you do whatever you want to me in return.

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  • I hate letting people to pay for me. I get super uncomfortable and always offer to pay or split. But the guy I currently like never allows me to pay a penny when we go out and eat and I feel bad he just believes men should always pay no matter what and to be quiet honest I find it very attractive and manly.

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  • You can expect men to pay for your dates, just don't start bitching when men pick a lower maintenance girl over you. Same goes for men. You can expect really good looking women but don't complain when those really good looking women don't want you.

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  • Nope.

    Yr forgetting that WE are evolutionarily "wired" for duplicity -- basically, to play 2 totally different games at once.

    • We're wired to *extract resources* from men with resources -- but not really to want to fuck those men (this is why money isn't a sexual turn-on, for the most part, for most women).
    ••• AND •••
    • We're wired to FUCK men to whom we're primally, PHYSICALLY attracted, when we are near ovulation.

    Yep.

    We're "programmed" to get knocked up by the most badass dudes -- and to get money from the most moneyed dudes to raise those babies.

    Enlighten yrself:
    (MHO opinion on both)

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1926143-women-are-biologically-programmed-to-want-to-marry-the-good-guys

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1925574-women-are-biologically-programmed-to-want-a-man-who-is-protective-a

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    • Doesn't really make a guy want to bother with relationships if that's the case.

    • @Anno_Domini Nah... It's easy enough to overcome. If you read what I wrote on those 2 threads, you'll see what I mean. Our own "tweaks" dwarf the shit out of the hardwiring... and we have this little thing called self-control, and this other little thing called morality, too.

      Mostly, it bugs the shit out of me when men try to play the "Oh, we're wired to fuck around on our wives/girlfriends" card... OH REALLY NOW, ARE YOU. Hahahahaha...

    • I agree, those guys are morons.

  • I agree! Women spend countless hours and hundreds of dollars to make themselves look pretty. Men can at least pay for a date!

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    • Shid if ya spent 500 on making yourself look good, what's 50$ more?

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    • @bobbyc And?

    • Ok dont shave and wear makeup no one is forcing you to do those things @asker

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