5 minute read
Guys, you're all doing this to yourselves. In fact I almost put this in the Guy's Behavior section instead of the dating section.
Guys, despite how this article may sound to some of you I am on your side. I'm on everyone's side. Ladies please chime in.
First of all, nice guys don't exist except in your minds. The "nice guy" isn't an actual person. It's a mentality. An attitude. A vibe.
This mentality is faker than plastic boobs. Girls sense that shit. Nobody is naturally extremely nice.
This mentality generally comes from guys who think they're not enough so they overcompensate by acting nicer than they normally would. They act like someone they're not. That is fake. An asshole even how shitty he might be is still more real and genuine than that. And that is what women want. No they do NOT want what they can't have and they do NOT want an asshole. What women want is a man who is happy enough with himself to present the real authentic him. How is a girl going to be happy with you if you are not happy with you?
That's right. Girls would rather be with a genuine asshole than be with a fake extra kind person because there's just something off-putting about that fake vibe. How fucking sad is that for women. This is the unfortunate reality girls have to deal with: 90 something percent of creepy vibe nice guy or genuine real assholes.
I once met a classic "nice guy" but as a girl (does the term nice girl exist? idk) and this girl tried to win me over by being extra sweet to me. I could just tell. I could smell it. Other guys didn't want her either believe it or not. I knew from her friends that she was a virgin and her dating life was struggling. I'm not badmouthing this girl I'm just stating the situation. Let me tell you something: that shit was uncomfortable. Extremely off putting. Major turn off. That's what girls deal with all the time.
We can all agree on one thing: this "nice guy" mentality had to start somewhere right? I guarantee it started with guys who think kindness earns them something because that’s what girls want right? Wrong. Girls don’t want a guy who treats them well out of misunderstood obligations as men. Girls want someone who is fucking real with them. The fact guys have expectations shows they’re being disingenuous and that’s the exact reason why girls reject someone with the “nice guy” mentality. They want a genuine guy. This nice guy mentality comes from guys that expect a certain outcome and then are unhappy with the results. There’s no arguing this.
I don't give a damn even if you really are perfect and a girl rejects you. If you really knew your worth and were genuinely happy with you and your life then you would laugh at how this girl missed out. You'd continue doing you and being happy because you would know you didn't need her. If you really believe a girl is "using you" or taking advantage of your good nature then dump her. Know you'll be happier without her. Stop blaming her for using what was presented to her. If an eager to help person is in front of her then that's what'll happen. Don't be eager to help. Be fucking you. Not the extra nice you the real you deep down inside that you're too shy to show. If your kindness is this easily earned then girls might assume you show this kindness to anyone and that she herself may not be all that special to you.
Don't give me this "but I really am a super nice guy" crap. Get off your high horse. You're not Mother Teresa. Nobody is that nice. We as human beings are all selfish to varying degrees. A nice guys’ goal is to get a girl is it not? It is. And that is selfish. No harm in admitting it. I can hear some of you guys, "ok sounds fair but I'm tired of being hurt and rejected or played by women I think I'm going to explode!" Well you know what: if you want a good woman then you have to become a good man.
Guys: work on your mentality. Work on yourselves. Admit that you're actually kind of selfish. It's not a bad thing. Everyone is. You don't have to broadcast it to anyone. Just internally come to the realization that you're not the nicest person on planet earth and neither is any other guy. You're all actually kind of selfish. Now run with it. Be a little selfish in your life. Do NOT do that by hurting others. Focus on you. The inner you. Just do you. Become a better person for fucks sake. Stop pointing the finger at women and blaming them for your sadness and for not wanting a creepy vibe dude.
That is your fault, your mentality's fault. Stop doubting yourself. The real you not the unnaturally nice you. Work on yourself. Work on your mentality. Work on your happiness. Your happiness without a girl. Work on yourself mentally emotionally spiritually. Be selfish. Make yourself happy without a girl. When you take care of your shit and are happy on your own terms girls will like that. They love it. If you love yourself then a woman will be capable of loving you. That's what every woman wants is a man that is happy with himself.
Do not become misogynistic. Do not become cynical. Do not hate women. They simply just don't deserve it. And realize something. Hate breeds more hate. If you snap and treat a girl badly and then she snaps and treats another well-meaning guy badly and that guy snaps and the whole viscous cycle keeps going. Do everyone a favor and become a better person. Become so amazing that you inspire others to be better themselves.
I really wish this would be the last of this nice guy talk. I wish I could apologize to all the decent girls out there that have had to deal with this nonsense. I wish I could apologize to all those decent guys out there that are in a lot of pain and are struggling to figure out their shit. But my apology wouldn’t go too far so I share my knowledge instead. I wish guys who are dealing with this ugly part of their lives could take my advice and better themselves. Sadly I anticipate most guys won’t listen to a word I said even though this shit’s gold. But if I can help even one person, whether it be a guy out there or give a lady out there some hope that some guys do grow up and figure their shit out, then awesome.