I used to laugh when my friends said "oh girls love the guys that are assholes to them"... I watched them chase the guys that weren't worth it. I watched them cry over boys that weren't men... And I didn't get it? I mean, honestly; WHO likes a guy that stands them up? That ignores their texts? That acts like he doesn't care?
WELL ladies and gentlemen, I lived to tell the story!
It started out nice... he was romantic, would text me every minute, home-made dinners, trips, flowers, gifts- the works! It wasn't long until I have fallen... 6 months in... I began to see the true side. As soon as he had me, everything stopped. Calls were kept to a minimum, if not ignored, I was the one to initiate plans, texts were 1 word "k" or "lol", forget about the little things. His true colors came out, asshole! SO WHAT DID I DO?
I tried to talk to him, I tried to rekindle the romance, I bitched and bitched some more.... nothing... It wasn't long before, I realized that I had spent the last 3 months chasing a guy that was an asshole to me! The more of an asshole he was, the harder I tried. It's like I wasn't used to having a guy reject me? It took a blow to my self esteem... I mean this was the first and only guy to treat me like I wasn't a priority, when I gave him my all. I had guys that would treat me so nicely, but i was determined to get this guy (who made me believe he was the perfect man within the first 6 months!).
So what did I do? Yeah I have to admit, I stalked him for a while. I would send the occasional message, still hoping and waiting. WHY DO I WANT HIM?! And then I stopped. Cold turkey- 2 weeks.
And guess who came crawling back? Mr. Asshole! Excuses and apologies. Have to admit, I was so happy at first. And then I remembered... his ignorance, rudeness, and of course lack of concern. But his charm was so tempting... ! Well this isn't the story about the strong female hero. I wasted 2 years of my life, on the charming asshole, who promised to change, who lied way too much and did too little.
Finally, I walked away, devastated. I couldn't believe it. I WAS THAT GIRL. Who used to watch her friends chase these unworthy guys... and I had become one! Funny how that worked out. I can see how both girls and guys get themselves into a cycle. Rose colored glasses maybe? Empty promises? Lesson learned, too bad it took me 2 years to admit that I was the girl that was chasing the asshole.