My 8 Principles for Dating Success

Here I will discuss my personal principles for dating. They are attuned to my personality so not everything may apply to you, some may seem silly to you, but guess what? I don't care. But still, I hope its of use to you and you find it a nice read. Hey, tell me in the comments what you think! Responses are always appreciated!

Quality over quantity

I know many men tend to lower their standards to increase quantity and think they will be successful if they are really persistent. After all, if one approaches more women, one should be more successful right? Well maybe, but for me personally, I don't like to have to go through hordes of women to finally find a great girl who was close to me all this time without me knowing it, which brings me to the next point.

Prioritize girls that you already know

I personally consider the girls who I am already acquainted or friends with first before going to over to considering friends of friends and then finally complete strangers. I personally think that there's you have a higher chance with someone thats close to you than with a random stranger.

Reach out to people that reach out to you

This is purely out of self respect and for the respect of the people that find me interesting enough time to reach out to me. It is always appreciated, and I will always respond positively.

I know some people disregard the people that reach out to them and tend to focus on their one single crush, this may turn them blind to all other people reaching out to them because they only have eyes for one person. I would like to give everyone that wants to spend time with me a fair chance, so I will reach out back to them if they do to me.

Value a woman's status

When i say valuing her status I don't mean her financial status or her looks but a different kind of status that sometimes goes overlooked.

* Relationship status: Does she have a relationship? Is she coming out of one? If yes, was it a bad break up? Is she single? For how long?

Yeah, some guys will hit on a girl thats already in a relationship, that can be unwanted so I put importance on this, because I don't want to make a move on a girl that is already available, it seems so desperate lol.

* Geographic location: Where does she live? Close by? Far away? how far away?

I don't want to travel long distances all the time to see a girl, I like to travel, but having someone close by is much more fun than someone who is far away.

* Health status: Does she smoke? does she take drugs? Is she overweight? Does she go to the gym?

Yeah, this is pretty important, I don't like smokers and drugs addicts, but I love girls that go to the gym and live a healthy lifestyle.

* Emotional status: Is she emotionally available at the moment? Is she looking for someone? Is she hurt? Does she need more time?

I don't want to take advantage of girls that are in a vulnerable position, it feels like manipulation. And if a girl is not emotionally available, she is gonna reject you regardless of what you do.

Don't chase girls

I will not chase girls. It feels like everything is forced and it feels like trying too hard for what is just being social. It takes all the fun away of the social interaction part of getting to know people. I am a casual dude with a laid back attitude. Why should I run after people so they spend time with me? No thank you.

Checking out girls

I know some men tend to check girls out from afar before actually making a move. I don't do this, I will approach a girl without actually making any moves on her so I can check her out from closer by. And actually decide if I like her after speaking to her. In other words im not too aggressive about making a move.

T'is but a scratch

People can reject you for the most arbitrary reasons ever! So I don't take rejection too seriously. It makes no sense to beat yourself up about it and ponder endlessly about what you did wrong and what you could have done better.

Success is not the norm, but the exception

I don't expect to be rejected but I have no expectations to be successful. If you are realistic about dating then you know that rejection is what happens most of the time for you as initiator.

I don't take rejection with a smile though, I'm just laid back about it, its no big deal really. I just focus on seeing if I can be successful instead of putting a set goal for success. I set micro goals, if I say hi to a girl and she says hi back its already a victory, a small one indeed. A small victory is better than a large defeat.

Instead of thinking, this is how I want her to respond, I think, lets see how she responds. So I never have any set of desired results. This makes rejection a lot less of a problem generally.


These are just my principles for dating. It does not mean that they are better than yours, its just what I personally choose to do.

I am curious what you think of this, I have never really told anyone about this to be honest so I have no idea how people will respond, but I'm sure it will not be too bad.



Join the discussion



What Girls Said 1

  • 1mo

    You (@anonman32): I am curious what you think of this, I have never really told anyone about this to be honest so I have no idea how people will respond, but I'm sure it will not be too bad.

    Me: Definitely not too bad. I read through this and then read through it again and when I did reread, I actually wrote down your eight principles (actual pen to paper- old school, man. lol!) Writing them down helped me in thinking your principles out.

    And I have to say I think there is value in every one of them. I think every man just normally should think this way about dating. The men that think like you will be more successful at dating, I believe.

    Thank you for posting. I enjoyed it. :)


What Guys Said 3

  • 1mo

    Your 8 principles are good

  • 9d

    I really like this take. I also believe in quality over quantity. I have turned down attention seeking girls I didn't find attractive who threw themselves at me. Sadly my luck has been that at uni and so far I met sweet girls who I liked who were already in a relationship.

    One has become single. Who I'm interested in.

    I also screen new women for the characteristics you describe. Great take man, you should write more and be a coach!

    Can u help me out on a question about a girl who is moving back near where I live?

    • 9d

      thanks man, yes im interested in write some more. i have followed your question, i will answer it tomorrow because im almost going to bed now its late here.

    • 7d

      Thanks, I'd really appreciate your thoughts on it pls?

  • 1mo

    I think you have your shit together compared to most on here in your age group. Some on here think that because of my age, I don't know anything. I wish they would listen to you. I've read a lot of your responses and I like most. I really hate saying this, but you are an exception on here. A sad commentary on our young people.