The dating culture is rigged, and at the risk of seeming like the whiny kid who gets on the internet every time he doesn't get his way, I will explain why. Also, this isn't an attack on men or women, just what I have noticed.
It favors women
This is so glaringly obvious, but most women just deny it. Who is expected to make the first move? Who is generally expected to pay for dates? The emotional support? Provide physical safety? It seems that largely in dating men take on the task of catering to her and her needs.
What's hers is hers and what's mine is hers. Yes, this is just a playful poke at women's tendencies, to collect property of their current boyfriend. But the same stays true throughout the early stages of dating. For example, on Facebook I see girls posting quotes about how men won't talk to them or how they want to be treated with respect, and those same girls are at the club every weekend with their ass out and repeat the process.
Or my favorite is the selection process. Guys get shamed looking for traits in girls, but women get to be uber-selective, and sometimes can't even remain consistent and jump from guy to guy.
What about the shy guys?
I have always been tentative around girls for most of my life because of a lot of trauma directly related to my interest in them from earlier in my life. By no means am I shy, but I have no belief that a girl would want to talk to me or be involved romantically. Now to me, most would say, "you have to forget all that and grow a pair and ask her out".
I bet you would have a little different response if it was a girl saying all the same things. Probably something like, "just be patient and the right guy will go talk to you. He doesn't deserve you if he wouldn't talk to you." Why doesn't a shy guy deserve a girl? Maybe he just needs the same thing.
Thanks for reading, let me know what your thoughts are. Let's keep it civil. 😁