When it Comes to Dating, Men Are the Biggest Hypocrites on Earth

All this talk about double-standards and hypocrisy on the part of the Democrats after the presidential election got me thinking.

I've been reading a lot of questions and myTakes on here about how men and women view each other, what they think of the dating game, why they're either fed up or frustrated or just plain angry about all of it, etc. That's when I realized that while men are quick to point out all the failings of the feminist movement (how many times has the word "feminazi" been uttered on GaG and the internet in general?), they're not so keen about looking themselves in the mirror.

If they did, they might see a lot of crazy hypocrisy that they really need to FIX before we women start taking them seriously.

Hypocrisy #1: "Women only care about looks! That's all they ever... Oh DAMN, she's HOT!"

We ALL care about looks, guys. You do, too. Especially you. To try to argue that women are more about looks is downright stupid. Take five girls and put them in a bar; only one is really hot while the other four are merely so-so. The one gorgeous chick will get 90% of the attention for the entire night and the other four girls will be lucky if any guy even looks in their direction, let alone talks to them.

I think men believe girls only care about looks because they spend their lives approaching bimbos. Yeah, a lot of times, the hottest girl is also the dumbest and you know what? They're also likely to be incredibly shallow, too, so it's no surprise you guys only have experience with women who care about looks. Maybe if you approached a woman who had some substance, you wouldn't be so quick to generalize.

Hypocrisy #2: "Girls should be feminine...but wait, not THAT feminine...and not THAT mannish."

You guys really can't seem to make up your minds, and no matter what the girl does, it's wrong. On the one hand, you want a girl to be feminine; you want her to have some standard/traditional female traits because, unsurprisingly, that's what you like. Then ten seconds later, you turn around and freak out if a girl wears something pink. The assumption is she's just some ditzy chick or a princess or something, and you expect some over-emotional women crying on your shoulder.

Then you flip around and say, if we're just wearing jeans and a sweatshirt or something, that maybe we want to "look a little more feminine." Okay, so where's the line? No dresses? Or just no dresses of a certain type? And what about color and makeup? What amount of makeup can I wear so you'll still be attracted to me but won't call me a whore?

Hypocrisy #3: "Experienced girls are sluts...experienced guys just know what they're doing."

I know some guys like the virgin thing (though not so many in my experience, especially after a certain age), and other guys like experienced women. Let's face it, sex requires practice like anything else. Guys like to believe they're Don Juans right out of the gate but trust me, you're not, and you need just as much practice as the rest of us. However, if a woman has some experience in this area, that's someone to be avoided and even shunned.

Guys, on the other hand, can be Casanovas because they slept with a hundred women and that's perfectly okay. I can't even begin to tell you how infuriating this is. I also find it interesting that a man's sexual history is apparently irrelevant while a woman's sexual history is critical to any relationship. I'm no feminazi - I'm not even a feminist - but this is still a far cry from equal.

Any other ladies want to contribute to this list? Chime in. :)


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What Guys Said 79

  • 16d

    1. "Yeah, a lot of times, the hottest girl is also the dumbest and you know what? They're also likely to be incredibly shallow, too." So. . . men aren't the only one who use shallow stereotypes of women. Actually, guys have an expression: :For every hot looking chick walking down the street, there's a guy somewhere who is tired of putting up with her shit!" Guys who are just out to score and add to their count may be Shallow Hals about looks, but guys who are looking for a relationship know that there is much more to a relationship than physical attraction.

    Still. . . no one will say (with a straight face) that physical attraction is not important in a relationship. That is not a conscious decision on our part; it is just the way that we were wired at the factory.

    2. More mature guys know what we want and I want a feminine girl. I frequently tell my girlfriend, "You're such a girly girl! Please don't change that!"

    3. Girls can be sluts and so can guys. I don't want to be with a girl if I am # 67 but at my age, I don't expect to find a girl for whom I would be #2 or #3. What is important is that she respect her body as something not to be given away just for physical pleasure for a night but only when she is in a relationship where she trusts her partner and has genuine feelings of affection. If she feels that way, she is not a slut. IMHO, the same rule applies to guys. No. they're not king studs; their just man whores and sluts.

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  • 13d

    No-one defends these double standards. But it's not just guys that contribute to them.. a lot of girls feel the same way. A guy who is a player is a 'cool' guy...'we like bad boys"... but when the guy dumps the girl, he's a #@%%%%% all the way.

    And girls are as quick as guys to call a girl who has been around bad names and not speak to her...

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    • 11d

      well, people who support them are defending and perpetuating them. they would not exist or subsist, without support.

  • 16d

    I think when men say women only care about looks, they're talking about the overall situation. Men like looks in WOMEN, but women care about looks in themselves, in OTHER WOMEN, and even men too despite them denying it. Men don't care how other men look or try to measure up to them.

    Most men like a feminine woman, and not too much of a mannish one. They want a balance, and there really is nothing debatable about that.

    I hear No.3 a lot and I really don't know what I think. I do know that many women want experienced men and even have their own hangups about virgin guys, especially ones who are into adulthood. For me, an experienced woman is fine, and an inexperienced one is fine as well.

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  • 17d

    Have you finally learned that hypocrisy lives on the Internet?

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    • 16d

      Yeah, and IRL I don't think guys are this bad. Lots of angry guys on this site.

    • 16d

      @SovereignessofVamps Pretty much, some guys come on this site to vent about women and basically take out their hatred on women. Same with women sometimes but it does seem more common with men. They absolutely do not say any of this shit irl, they may even be different irl.

    • 15d

      @SovereignessofVamps I agree, I've never seen such venom and bitterness from men until I joined this site.

  • 17d

    Have you ever had any contact with men... like, any men at all?

    1) We men know we're visual, we put importance in looks, just like girls. When you don't know someone, thee first thing that you notice is their looks, so we're very aware that we'll approach a pretty girls before approaching an average one. No guy complains about that. The only thing guys complain about is when girls say that girls don't care about looks that much, cause we all know that's not true.

    2) You do know every guy is different, right? While one guy likes girly girls, the other one prefers tomboys. But I think most of us want girls to stick to mostly the style we prefer, but we want her to know how to dress appropriately. Like don't go with jeans to a fancy dinner.
    I'm more into girly girls, but I wouldn't complain, and I do find it hot, when she's around the house with some sweatpants.

    3) You talk about the "Stud-Slut" double standard, which very much exists, but what about the virgin double standard? A guy can't be a virgin once he's 18 if he wants to avoid being shamed, while a girl can be in her 20's, and be a virgin without a problem. So you can't talk about the "Stud-Slut" double standard without talking about the other one, cause they both go hand in hand.

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    • 16d

      Actual men are more likely to approach an average girl because they believe she is likely to be single and they have a better shot with her than a hot girl who they might assume already has a boyfriend.

      2. Guys don't mind tomboys or girly girls. Men however, absolutely detest man hating feminist.

      3. The reason for the slut/stud standard goes beyond just it being double standard and make sense when you look at the fact that each gender has their own imperative in mating.

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    • 11d

      @BubbleBoy69 I'm not saying super model looks but I do not find average attractive, that's not something to impress others just the only thing I find attractive are very slender in shape girls with gorgeous faces, lookup Lindsey Stirling she's very attractive and she is my expectation I guess you could say physically, I don't care if it's harder, so what if I have to ask out two more girls until I get her than most guys? I'll still get that type of girl.

    • 11d

      @BubbleBoy69 www.allypitypang.com/.../01-lindsey-stirling.jpg

      Did the search for you, that type of girl is the only kind I find attractive, again I don't care if it's going to take a couple extra rejections I'm still committed to my standards and it's not realistically unattainable like you say.

  • 10h

    1 - Guys, and girls, DO care about looks. But guys will ADMIT it. So sorry, but it is girls who are the biggest hypocrites on this one.

    2 - I'll take a girl in jeans and t-shirt any day over some bimbo who doesn't know high heels ruin the feet.

    3- Simple evolutionary biology.

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  • 7d

    Women tend to make mistakes by focusing on bigger things than focusing and concentrating on smaller things. If you want your man to love you, never aim higher on him, but the lowest and smallest. For example women wear make-up 24/7 so by the time we get in bed, the make-up is gone and will start to see another person you are. Try to stay as natural as possible and wear make up as a spice to show him that you are the best woman he can ever have. Giving that sense to a man makes him more responsible, loving, caring and so madly deeply in love with you. Stay original at most, be a best friend not a cage-controller. If you want to bring a man to settle down to your demands, be original just like the neck and the head. The neck is unrecognized part of the body but for the head to be, it is the neck.

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  • 10d

    It takes two to tango

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  • 11d

    Hypocrisy, yes, but different. It's the same difference as whether you would have men and women maintain the same physical requirements for whatever task. Well, women are innately weaker than men by half per pound. Considering most men weigh more than women, an average woman is like 20-25% as strong as an average man. Not to mention weaker bones, meaning more likely to be injured.

    While you could call it hypocrisy for a woman to say, "You should lift more weight than me, but I don't want to lift that much," that doesn't account for the differing strength levels; and is thus a faulty comparison. Likewise, men and women are different; thus, we are bound by different social rules and obligations. I'mmostly referring to the differing sexual perspectives on men and women. Men are virgin shamed; women are slut shamed. It's not hypocrisy.

    But, I feel like you're mix and matching various things a whole host of different men have said, given your reference point is various MyTakes and comments. It's only hypocrisy if the two conflicting points come from the same mouth.

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  • 12d

    Hypocrisy & double standards affect EVERYONE... BS is everywhere !! ... this can be my only response to this post ...

    https://youtu.be/4-PIckHrZ0o

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  • 12d

    Damn, I didn't want to, but it irritated me, all the generalizations of this mytake, I can go on and on about the generalizations we can make towards women, but it's not going to get nothing done, anyways. It's super useless to keep going or to have a debate because both parties use double standards, PERIOD.

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  • 12d

    Again with the feminist mumbo-jumbo... Men and women are not equal. Nature made us diferent so we can be eachother's halfs. One picks up where the other lacks. So no, these are absolutely not double standards.

    1. Looks is fine, humans are visual. And not all guys will approach the same girl, i for one actualy don't approach girls i fid sexy right away because i want something long term.

    2. You can be feminine and wear adult clothes. Just saying.

    3. "A key that opens many locks is a good key; a locks that many keys can open is worthless"(it's not an acutal quote, but close enough). Women are suposed to not let every guy who comes upto them get with them, because then they'd be left with a lot of babies and no baby daddies.

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  • 12d

    experienced girl = slut
    experiened guy = a champ
    no shit.

    Every girl can be a slut, while only best looking/succesful/financially rich guys can be champs. And most importantly, it is wired in our genes that women in a system find 'experienced guys' attractive, while men in a system find 'experienced girls' repulsive. Nr. of sexual partners for a males is indicator of success, while for women it is an indicator of failure.

    It's very simple equtation really.

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  • 12d

    WRONG WRONG WRONG

    guys are OPEN about looks. unlike females, who ooo i only care about his personality bullshit... i will tell u right to ur face, if i dont like how u look i am not going to care to get to know u. no hypocricy there. NEXT.

    girls feminine... what girl does not look hot in pink? any guy that says that is a fucking fag. u hang out with a lot of fags it seems. never heard of ur issue u seem to have, but then again u seem to be a fem and u pro do have femnaz fag male friends. they are not real men. thats fine if thats what u want around u, but they are nothing like the actual male population. look around on GAG, everyone admits that they are little princesses. its something u have to deal with if u want a girlfriend. they want to be spoiled and babied to some degree. welcome to haveing tits. NEXT

    SLUTS... while it is much less likely for someone to say something about a guy who knows what they are doing PERIOD. a guy, person is less likely to say a girl is a slut depending on how she behaves and dresses less on her skill. girls get called sluts because of how they act, not because of the actual number of people they have slept with in almost all occasions. a girl can be stupid and sleep with one guy and be a slut. its all in how u behave and go about ur life. what u call slut though, guys have the opposite too though, which u dont seem to realize. if a guy underperforms that badly, he is called a fag ;) lol. so both sides have name calling based on sexual performance or behavior if u want to nit pick.

    in general guys are muuch more honest and u have ur own FEMALES to blame for most of the slut shamming... in society... females are so nice to each other i know.

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  • 13d

    This take is bullshit to me all it did was generalize guys and put them in a category. How can you say if 5 girls are in a club or whatever and one is good looking 90% of the time she'll get the attention. You don't know that everybody has a preference & as for me I can't be after a woman who has four or five guys up her ass. I don't have time or care how good she looks.

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    • 12d

      @Kountry_King
      If you don't believe that statement, then you need to do a little research, and I do mean a little, there have been plenty of studies done that prove the simple fact that in a room full of men and women the good looking ones will be hit on a minimum of 50 % more if not 70 - 90% more often than what people would call an average looking person... and it works both ways too.

    • 11d

      @Idonotgivearatsass idc about percentages everyone has a different way of thinking which is why I said it's bs. Like who Is getting asked this? More than likely the guys who will go after the hottest chick when they walk in. Everything isn't for everybody that's all I'm saying.

  • 13d

    I dont think women are about looks. They are about height. there's a difference.

    Overall i would agree that both sides want this stereotype thats meaningless and easy to fake if you have no real character.

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  • 13d

    Sounds like you're mad about "Nice Guys"

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  • 14d

    and women are the most perfect creatures on this planet, right? do us all a favor and get over yourself. Yes, some guys are hypocrites but so are girls. I wonder, how many females shame men for lacking some kind physical attribute? you want to complain about a girl being called a slut? what about the guys who are shamed for being a virgin? you want to complain about guys not making their mind up in what they want? yet we both know its the same thing for women. its people like YOU who are apart of the problem. you come on here venting about a gender when you know both men AND women do the same idiotic crap. By doing this, you are just as stupid as the people you complain about. grow a brain.

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  • 15d

    I find this article to be a gross generalization of "guys"

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  • 15d

    yeah okay we're hypocrites for wanting a traditional relationship with a woman that can treat us men with respect okay

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  • More from Guys
    59

What Girls Said 20

  • 16d

    Well... yeah, of course.

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  • 17d

    In before a guy uses the lock and key metaphor. I wonder how many men you triggered with this post. It was a great read

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    • 15d

      Yes but have you noticed how triggered women gets when you slut shame her or criticize her preferences? That is just funny and ridiculous and is a good reason not to respect a woman.

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    • 15d

      Trust a feminazi to twist my words. I don't need to look for a reason not to respect women, you provide plenty enough reasons already and you just provided me with another.

    • 15d

      @bobbyxx trust a loser to assume that I am feminazi just because he whines like a little bitch

  • 17d

    "Girls should be feminine"
    Haha yeah, and god forbid anyone ever tells a guy to man up!

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    • 17d

      Girls should be like they want to be just like we guys and to be like we want to be.

      But yeah, good point :P

  • 17d

    For the whole sex thing this is why you don't sleep with a guy who slept with over 100 girls. He just a can of fuck up.

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    • 17d

      Ha. Can be kind of true.

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    • 15d

      Whereas a woman who sleeps with a hundred guys is a slut right.

    • 15d

      See what i did there

  • 16d

    Or of course how they want a traditional woman but then hate on career driven women who want to be independent :)

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    • 16d

      should say NOT want a traditional woman.

      By traditional i mean a woman who lets her man make the money and doesn't mind having a man who pays for her.

    • 15d

      Or women want men to be chilvarous but won't behave like a lady.

    • 15d

      @bobbyxx Yeah but that's just hypocrisy.

  • 10h

    well donee

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  • 1d

    My now ex boyfriend flipped out and called me a "hoe" because he found out I used to sext with this one guy before him & I were even dating. When we broke up he told me he was fucking his exes behind my back.
    Like what the fuck? Talk about being a hypocritical asshole.

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  • 15d

    My absolute pet hate is that men get all upset if a woman turns them down for a date, and they think we're cruel just for saying no. Or they ask out a female friend, who has never shown any signs of interest, and if she says no she's 'broken his heart' or was 'leading him on'.

    But they think nothing of dating a woman for a while, kissing her, saying sweet things, having sex with her, etc. and then dumping her - and we're not supposed to be upset about that, or we're 'crazy' or 'obsessed'.

    It's so hypocritical and just shows the double standards that men have.

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    • 15d

      My pet hate is women being hypocrites by complaining about double standards. Like you for instance, women think it is ok to judge looks but whine when they are judged like so. Women expect men to maintain chilvarly but won't maintain ladylike behaviour. Women demand their preferences but criticize men for their preferences like wanting wanting a virgin or a certain looking girl. Women whine about slut shaming but they creep shame.

  • 16d

    I actually agree that "Experienced girls are sluts... experienced guys just know what they're doing"

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  • 16d

    LOL they always say they want a good looking girl, but end up with the homeliest one so their manhood/self esteem doesn't get threatened.

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  • 16d

    guys who have slept around and want virgins can still find a virign that wants such a guy. I am exactly such a girl. I have always found such guys cool and mannish. I am sure as hell I will fall out of love if I know he has few women

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    • 10h

      Cool, so you don't mind if he is fucking other girls while seeing you?

  • 16d

    Let's change the hypothesis to: most people are hypocrites.

    However, Im proud to say that lately, I've been falling more for guys who aren't particularly handsome, but who are super hot to me because of their minds. I used to have a strong distaste for overweight people (for dating only, not in general) but I barely care anymore. It's not important. A great mind will make me happier.

    "I like manly men... but not macho-manly, that's just stupid. And they have to be sensitive and romantic too. But not gay-ish." Is the female version of #2 :p

    Experience doesn't matter much to me, I truly wish more people thought that way. Respect matters, and the way people view dating and love in general.
    I know a guy who slept with about 20 girls and think he's a slut of the worst kind. He only falls for looks, degrades the girls he sleeps with and calls them sluts/whores whenever he's drunk and tries to fuck every pretty girl he meets.
    I know another guy who slept with over 30 girls. He's smart, nice and respectful. You wouldn't guess he's that experienced at first sight, he's just a regular nice guy. But he's open minded, assertive and adventurous, which led to that number eventually.

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  • 16d

    thank you!! you're my savior !!

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  • 16d

    If you're referring to the online community and especially the "GAG" community, then yes, what you have pointed out is unquestionably right. But if you are referring to the "IN REAL LIFE" men, then... not so much because some men are more open minded and accepting than others. but yes, some men are straight up awful no matter what.

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  • 17d

    Honestly i'm just tired of all these things each gender says online.

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  • 17d

    Liked your take.
    Nice writing style, choose of words fits and I generally agree with it all.

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  • 17d

    I know men can totally not have their life together, pursue you, then look down on you for not respecting yourself enough to choose a man who has his life together. SMH

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  • 17d

    I feel like I've said this like a million times... but MEN aren't hypocritics, SOME men are hypocritics but not all. Just like not all women are hypocritics but wait... some are!

    We need to stop making this "men vs women" and start making it "crazy hypocritics vs sane people". Then the sane people can kick out the crazy hypocritics and we can stop this femanizi/maninist BS.

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    • 16d

      Thank you for saying this. I wait for the day that we don't have to say this any more.

  • 17d

    I think we can all agree that both genders can be equally as hypocritical and as indecisive as each other.
    Some women say they want to be with a good guy and end up dating douchebags, fuck boys and pricks.
    On the other hand some men say they prefer a plain Jane/girl next door type who can scrub up well on occasions and end up with high maintenance gold diggers who only really love and care about themselves.

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  • 17d

    What always bothers me, is when men say: They try to change me, change how much I see my friends (or even say, "What will my friends think if I spend so much time with my girl and not them?").
    I hate this. Women accommodate a lot of themselves for the man, usually (in my experience). But men refuse to do so, because it would make them 'weak' or that they won't just change for anyone. Yet they expect to be accommodated by their girls at all times.

    They refuse to see them at times, because pickles forbid that their friends might think they are not spending enough time with them. I hate it, when they still behave like they were single but expect their women to not do so.

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