This is for all of the guys that hate sleeping in bed with their significant other.
1. When she's mad, ask her if she's on her period when she's not.
Her: "You're so lazy!"
You: "Are you on your period?"
2. Tell her it looks like she's gained weight.
This works best if she's self cautious.
3. Talk about how much you want to bang *insert a female that's not her*.
Caution: This one might not work if you say Beyonce because who doesn't want to bang Beyonce?
4. Don't shower for a week.
Or if you need a substitute because of work, after you workout don't shower immediately.
5. If she gets out of the kitchen, yell at her to stay in the kitchen to make you a sandwich.
Say "sammich" and you might earn yourself an extra day on the couch.:)