Why is this subject even controversial? Many guys think girls don't have senses and can tell if you're being sincere. Good looking girls can tell the sincere nice guys from the feign nice guys, it's like telling the difference between red and blue.
If you're a true nice guy, then I love you guys <3 But if you're a fake nice guy you're not worth anyone's time.
I've also never been in a serious relationship because guys only really approach me because of how I look and never even care to take the time to learn about my interests, personality, etc. It's like talking to a wall with a smiley emojii painted on it, it's obviously fake.
This is nothing but a myth that desperately needs busting! Women think that they can tell with 100% accuracy if a man is being genuine by his level of conversational skills. This is simply not the case as level of social and conversational skills is NOT a reflection of interest but a reflection of time spent honing social skills.
If you actually talk to pick up artists and the like they will brag that by simply bullshiting (being good at conversation) they can get almost any woman they want. They know this is virtually the only means by which many women evaluate men so they spend much of their time honing their bullshitting skills, meanwhile those of us who have jobs, hobbies, etc ., but aren't that good or creative with our conversations are rejected out of hand because women just "know" we aren't being real, even though we are.
Also, if women can tell so accurately about which guys are real, how is it so many women have so many relationships where the guy turned out to be fake?
It's not a myth, it's honestly not hard to tell if someone is being true or simply faking it.
"Also, if women can tell so accurately about which guys are real, how is it so many women have so many relationships where the guy turned out to be fake?"
This is honestly something I've asked myself numerous times and I suspect (Based on personal experiences) that it's because they're not willing to even consider the fact that the guy they like is not interested in them truly at all. I mean lets say you have a guy that is really hot, like sexy as hell... and then you get the feeling he only wants you for sex but then again you don't want to jump to conclusions so they try and see for themselves and by then it's to late - I think this anyway.
It sounds more likely you've never been in a serious relationship because you've never given a guy a chance. I've met girls like that who think they know everything and everyone. They didn't seem very happy.
I've never been in a serious relationship because 1 - I don't want to just be used for sex. 2 - I want a guy that actually is himself. 3 - I'm picky when it comes to personality.
So yeah I guess that's so, but part of it has to do with my school.
I almost have no idea how to respond to this. It's laughable. You base this, "Good looking girls can tell the sincere nice guys from the feign nice guys, it's like telling the difference between red and blue" on what? You've concocted this warped arrogant perception on apparently nothing. I don't even know where to start on how absurd this all is. You're young so I'll chalk it up to inexperience but I'd strongly suggest you be cautious I've seen plenty of girls say nonsense like this and fall flat on their faces plenty of times.
Also, the only reason you haven't gotten burned yet is because you're being cautious and given your current mindset that's wise. It will probably only take once for your eyes to be opened, unfortunately.
you are what you attract, and that is a very scary thought. Why would a nice girl be with a jerk in the first place? I was with many jerks in my life, simply because I didn't realize that I was acting like a JERK myself. I was some "jerk" alright *pun intended*. IF I look back I didn't really want a bad boy or a guy who played it "cool" as you put it, I wanted stability and thought the "jerks" who appeared to be mature could give it to me. It is such bad FAIL if you confuse "maturity" for "stability"... because half of the jerks who I thought was mature, was really immature, acting like children in the HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL of life.
But girls wanting this adventure just makes guys want to act like the jerks creating more jerks. I am a nice guy but I'm self confident and, dynamic, i'm the guy girls come after but I don't like to play with girls emotions so I generally tell them if I'm not in to them or simply reject/ ignore all of their advances. I feel like also girls want to change bad guys as a project, but I feel internally guys want a bad girl as well that's where you get the in love with the stripper guys etc. I don't know people are just dumb
This is one reason that I'm staying within the safe zone of life, because stuff like this always happens. The bad guys my score points for getting attractive women but thosr type of guys don't win everything. I see guys with ladies who has the goods only for the best looking guys to observe lots of times. This happens in schools, dates, & other places. I just wish that all of this can just change for the best of people so everyone could win without any problems attached. As for me, I've never been on dates & will do what I can be successful in the future. It will take time because I get nervous when I have to deal with this situation with any girl that approaches shy & normal guys.
Lol such a stupid post. All 5 of your points are flawed. They aren't confident, they're cocky. Mysterious? Not all of them. They aren't clingy because they didn't like you to start with. They like adventure? As in good guys don't? They don't fool you, you fool yourself. Your misjudgement of what the opposite gender is made of is the reason girls fall for jerks.
Coincidently I couldn't give less of a shit about what girls have done previous to dating me; so far as their past actions don't affect the way they are now. What bothers me is damaged girls generalizing guys and making men as a whole look like the bad guy for poor decisions they made in their life. @circlebill
You get what you wish for woman. If you need quick pleasure go for bad guys, if you want your entire life to be happy , then the nice guys are the right choice, i think its simple Physcology , women thinks hyperactive bad guys are attractive , they think they are cool , but the reality is they are not good for long time relationships, but in case nice guys are sweet , but they don't over give the fun feeling , because they are shy at initial stage of relationship , after that they become more fun and loving than bad guys, but women hate to wait for the fun part , that's why they end with jerks all the time , if you need the best all you to do is stop your sub conscious judgement of a guy and see through him.
Such B. S. I know a ton of nice guys who are confident as all hell, just they express it as being sweet and kind. What girls really like in jerks is the excitement and the not knowing what's gunna happen next, keeps them on their toes and not bored. Don't buy this we like them cause they're confident crap.
Yes, it seems that many are like children, if you don't keep them entertained and stimulated 24/7 they get bored and cheat or leave. Its like we exist only to satisfy whatever whims they have at the moment, and if we can't they change us out with no more empathy than they give to changing one of their little outfits.
They express confidence in their sweetness and kindness? I'm not even sure how to respond to that. Being confident (in general) is not the same as being confidently sweet and kind. Females (typically) like masculine confidence caused by testosterone. Women subconsciously like males that have healthy hormone levels which they display through their (masculine) actions. It's biology/evolution.
People end up with jerks bc they are jerks. The only person who accepts being jerked around is a person who will also jerk , others around. So the behavior is reasonsble to them.
A person who would never think of jerking someone around or waste their time would spot and be repelled by it coming from someone else.
You can't smell a room that stinks when you stink too.
I think people end up with people like themselves. Deep down these girls are not very good but they appear to be and think they are. They have to get burned in order to get their stuff together. That or they're blinded by their emotions. This all goes for people in general, not just girls.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Some girls are really just dumb. Or they are incredibly insecure, they try to play "games" and act like they are some kind of flirting masterminds when really they are just desperate for attention. They act like hooking up with randoms make them cool, or desirable. I feel sorry for them, sorry that they need validation in this way. And i'm not talking about the girls who are actual players, just to be clear or the ones that just want to have fun. No, I'm talking about the ones that send ridiculous texts like "don't you love me" followed with a selfie of mostly their boobs, to a guy who has pretty much said hey, just chilling at home tonight don't feel like going out." I have a guy friend (just friend, he's kinda a slut) who gets this stuff a lot and he says the girls are just so easy they fool themselves. So in conclusion there are some really stupid girls out there, and some guys who have no ethical problems taking advantage of them.
I think this is true. And to extend I would say they don't need to be assertive necessarily. They just need to make themselves available. Nowadays it isn't culturally acceptable or legal for men to just take what they want unlike the past. So until or unless that changes women have do their part as well.
Girls like jerks because of what society tells us..."nice guys are too nice and boring" and "jerks are fun and better lovers" guess what... that jerks is and always will b a jerk there's no long term love or security being with a jerk. Nice guys will grow with you and most of all keep their promise they made when they penetrated you... and that promise is simple: "i will not hurt u purposely and i will be secretive about our love and only share that love with you" a jerk can't even speak those type of words let alone live them... a nice guy doesn't have to try to live up to a promise because nice guys are truly nice guys...
because a lot of them don't know any better, yet they complain that ALL guys think of women as sex objects or isn't shit. I good reason why so many of them switch to being lesbian or bi. They can't recognize a good guy even when they get to know them. (Im not speaking for All girls but the majority of them)
No. My believe is that it has to do with confident cuz guys like that can charm these naive gurls into fallen for them. They think the guys really mean what they say infact it's all Juz delusional words. If the guy is fun and charming (has to do with comfidence) any cuties would be really interested in them. Cuties these days Juz wanna have fun so those fun type of guys are gonna win them. They don't even think about the outcome at hat the guys could do that to other cuties as well. They think the guy only say those luvly wonderful words to her and all the fun things while on the other side, they ain't limiting themself to one cuties. is the reason why these silly cuties fall for the jerks with "confidence" that every cuties crave for. Condense got chall naive cuties good don't they xP
I think your take is accurate, though I'm not sure if it's clear enough (not blaming you, its a messy issue) to help 'nice guys'.
How do you reconcile: "And if that comes with honesty, that is a gold mine. " with "They don't tell you from the begining all about them nor their feelings toward you. They keep it calm and play it 'cool'.
These seem to contradict. And I'm sure the 'girls like jerks' guys are going to suggest that in fact, women prefer the latter.
Then I wouldn't tell nice guys you like honesty. It doesn't seem like a plus to you. In fact you want a guy who isn't a piece of shit, but is mysterious and plays a little hard to get (which jerks do naturally because... they don't care...)
Thanks for posting this. I'm dating what you call a "jerk". He's broken up with me a couple times. He's said some pretty harsh things to me. He even had some side chicks. but this last breakup got him thinking. He finally asked me to be his official girlfriend and has been acting so much better. He's been honest. No one approves with me and him being back together but no one has made me this happy. He has a lot of qualities I love in a man. Bruting and wounded types need to be saved too 😊 I love a good mystery too.
You said He's broken up with me a couple times. He's said some pretty harsh things to me. but noone has made you that happy. what exactly does he do lmao. Be rude to you?
@genuinelysensitive because he knocked on my door and apologized. Something no guy has ever done. He admitted his wrong doings and that's good enough for me.
Well I was taught to forgive but I set some boundaries and he's doing better. You can't judge and look at everyone else the exact same. I'd rather have a man who sees his faults, apologizes for them and tries to do better than give up and try to find someone "perfect". perfect is boring.
most girls go for the alpha males... aka the d bags. I used to love the cocky guys bc you feel protected... thing is now I found a real man one who isn't a jerk one who is super special to me and super sweet. He makes me feel so much more safe around him than any of the d bags i was with
Alpha males aren't douchebags. Alpha males are dominant and do not need to talk loud to set the rulesrules and make themselves noticed.
Douchebags are loud attention whores who try to act dominant and bitch like little girls if they don't get the attention their mommys told them they deserve.
@This_guy_here I totally agree, the "alpha males" i fell in love with, the immature "adult" jerks, were really not ALPHA they just appeared to be ALPHA, well in my search for my ALPHA male I had to deal with all the FAKE ALPHAS to know the REAL DEAL from the fake deal. I don't regret my experience with all the fake alpha males...
Who came up with this alpha male shit? There's men and there's wankers. What makes a man strong is decent principles and a big heart. Take my advice. It's vain men who cause women the most problems. Being vain carries a catalogue of bad side effects with it. Trust me
I kinda agree... Those "nice" girls might be innocent or don't feel good about themselves and fall for them. Other girls might want a “bad boy” but would never give themselves up to a player because they know they’re worth more than that. I’ve never had my heart broken, I avoid players like the plague, even if they show genuine interest or their really popular.
It's funny, girls go after the guys who are jerks and they treat good guys like cracp and take kindness for a weakness! lol the real question is, what does a woman really want? I think that bad boy thing is just a young woman's phase, As soon as she decides to put away the party life and really wants to invest in settling down she'll stop chasing the bad boys and go after someone who's calm and sweet and mature
Believe it or not, jerks end up being nice and thus they get ditched afterwards, so the nice girls are not really nice :)
I give my personal experience: I'm normally a mysterious guy, when I meet a girl she knows shit about me, she follows me. afterwards when I get used to her I show my soft side and I end up being ditched by her eventually :)
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
103Opinion
Why is this subject even controversial? Many guys think girls don't have senses and can tell if you're being sincere. Good looking girls can tell the sincere nice guys from the feign nice guys, it's like telling the difference between red and blue.
If you're a true nice guy, then I love you guys <3 But if you're a fake nice guy you're not worth anyone's time.
I've also never been in a serious relationship because guys only really approach me because of how I look and never even care to take the time to learn about my interests, personality, etc. It's like talking to a wall with a smiley emojii painted on it, it's obviously fake.
This is nothing but a myth that desperately needs busting! Women think that they can tell with 100% accuracy if a man is being genuine by his level of conversational skills. This is simply not the case as level of social and conversational skills is NOT a reflection of interest but a reflection of time spent honing social skills.
If you actually talk to pick up artists and the like they will brag that by simply bullshiting (being good at conversation) they can get almost any woman they want. They know this is virtually the only means by which many women evaluate men so they spend much of their time honing their bullshitting skills, meanwhile those of us who have jobs, hobbies, etc ., but aren't that good or creative with our conversations are rejected out of hand because women just "know" we aren't being real, even though we are.
Also, if women can tell so accurately about which guys are real, how is it so many women have so many relationships where the guy turned out to be fake?
It's not a myth, it's honestly not hard to tell if someone is being true or simply faking it.
"Also, if women can tell so accurately about which guys are real, how is it so many women have so many relationships where the guy turned out to be fake?"
This is honestly something I've asked myself numerous times and I suspect (Based on personal experiences) that it's because they're not willing to even consider the fact that the guy they like is not interested in them truly at all. I mean lets say you have a guy that is really hot, like sexy as hell... and then you get the feeling he only wants you for sex but then again you don't want to jump to conclusions so they try and see for themselves and by then it's to late - I think this anyway.
It sounds more likely you've never been in a serious relationship because you've never given a guy a chance. I've met girls like that who think they know everything and everyone. They didn't seem very happy.
I've never been in a serious relationship because
1 - I don't want to just be used for sex.
2 - I want a guy that actually is himself.
3 - I'm picky when it comes to personality.
So yeah I guess that's so, but part of it has to do with my school.
But really, some girls like me just are waiting for the right time.
I almost have no idea how to respond to this. It's laughable. You base this, "Good looking girls can tell the sincere nice guys from the feign nice guys, it's like telling the difference between red and blue" on what? You've concocted this warped arrogant perception on apparently nothing. I don't even know where to start on how absurd this all is. You're young so I'll chalk it up to inexperience but I'd strongly suggest you be cautious I've seen plenty of girls say nonsense like this and fall flat on their faces plenty of times.
Also, the only reason you haven't gotten burned yet is because you're being cautious and given your current mindset that's wise. It will probably only take once for your eyes to be opened, unfortunately.
you are what you attract, and that is a very scary thought. Why would a nice girl be with a jerk in the first place? I was with many jerks in my life, simply because I didn't realize that I was acting like a JERK myself. I was some "jerk" alright *pun intended*. IF I look back I didn't really want a bad boy or a guy who played it "cool" as you put it, I wanted stability and thought the "jerks" who appeared to be mature could give it to me. It is such bad FAIL if you confuse "maturity" for "stability"... because half of the jerks who I thought was mature, was really immature, acting like children in the HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL of life.
But girls wanting this adventure just makes guys want to act like the jerks creating more jerks. I am a nice guy but I'm self confident and, dynamic, i'm the guy girls come after but I don't like to play with girls emotions so I generally tell them if I'm not in to them or simply reject/ ignore all of their advances. I feel like also girls want to change bad guys as a project, but I feel internally guys want a bad girl as well that's where you get the in love with the stripper guys etc. I don't know people are just dumb
This is one reason that I'm staying within the safe zone of life, because stuff like this always happens. The bad guys my score points for getting attractive women but thosr type of guys don't win everything. I see guys with ladies who has the goods only for the best looking guys to observe lots of times. This happens in schools, dates, & other places. I just wish that all of this can just change for the best of people so everyone could win without any problems attached. As for me, I've never been on dates & will do what I can be successful in the future. It will take time because I get nervous when I have to deal with this situation with any girl that approaches shy & normal guys.
Lol such a stupid post. All 5 of your points are flawed. They aren't confident, they're cocky. Mysterious? Not all of them. They aren't clingy because they didn't like you to start with. They like adventure? As in good guys don't? They don't fool you, you fool yourself. Your misjudgement of what the opposite gender is made of is the reason girls fall for jerks.
I see you don't give the girls a free pass on dating jerks! Choices certainly have consequences! And as usual, it can only be guys' fault!
Coincidently I couldn't give less of a shit about what girls have done previous to dating me; so far as their past actions don't affect the way they are now. What bothers me is damaged girls generalizing guys and making men as a whole look like the bad guy for poor decisions they made in their life. @circlebill
@imnotcrearive
Yes, I feel that women who have this type of "feminist" mindset, can never truly grow as people, and remain immature for the rest of their lives...
You get what you wish for woman. If you need quick pleasure go for bad guys, if you want your entire life to be happy , then the nice guys are the right choice, i think its simple Physcology , women thinks hyperactive bad guys are attractive , they think they are cool , but the reality is they are not good for long time relationships, but in case nice guys are sweet , but they don't over give the fun feeling , because they are shy at initial stage of relationship , after that they become more fun and loving than bad guys, but women hate to wait for the fun part , that's why they end with jerks all the time , if you need the best all you to do is stop your sub conscious judgement of a guy and see through him.
Such B. S. I know a ton of nice guys who are confident as all hell, just they express it as being sweet and kind. What girls really like in jerks is the excitement and the not knowing what's gunna happen next, keeps them on their toes and not bored. Don't buy this we like them cause they're confident crap.
Yes, it seems that many are like children, if you don't keep them entertained and stimulated 24/7 they get bored and cheat or leave. Its like we exist only to satisfy whatever whims they have at the moment, and if we can't they change us out with no more empathy than they give to changing one of their little outfits.
They express confidence in their sweetness and kindness? I'm not even sure how to respond to that. Being confident (in general) is not the same as being confidently sweet and kind. Females (typically) like masculine confidence caused by testosterone. Women subconsciously like males that have healthy hormone levels which they display through their (masculine) actions. It's biology/evolution.
People end up with jerks bc they are jerks. The only person who accepts being jerked around is a person who will also jerk , others around. So the behavior is reasonsble to them.
A person who would never think of jerking someone around or waste their time would spot and be repelled by it coming from someone else.
You can't smell a room that stinks when you stink too.
I think people end up with people like themselves. Deep down these girls are not very good but they appear to be and think they are. They have to get burned in order to get their stuff together. That or they're blinded by their emotions. This all goes for people in general, not just girls.
Some girls are really just dumb. Or they are incredibly insecure, they try to play "games" and act like they are some kind of flirting masterminds when really they are just desperate for attention. They act like hooking up with randoms make them cool, or desirable.
I feel sorry for them, sorry that they need validation in this way.
And i'm not talking about the girls who are actual players, just to be clear or the ones that just want to have fun. No, I'm talking about the ones that send ridiculous texts like "don't you love me" followed with a selfie of mostly their boobs, to a guy who has pretty much said hey, just chilling at home tonight don't feel like going out."
I have a guy friend (just friend, he's kinda a slut) who gets this stuff a lot and he says the girls are just so easy they fool themselves.
So in conclusion there are some really stupid girls out there, and some guys who have no ethical problems taking advantage of them.
The answer to your Take can be narrowed down to this:
These "nice girls" aren't doing the picking of the guy, they are letting the guy pick THEM!
Girls need to be more proactive and CHOOSING their own guys, instead of sitting around being "chosen".
I think this is true. And to extend I would say they don't need to be assertive necessarily. They just need to make themselves available. Nowadays it isn't culturally acceptable or legal for men to just take what they want unlike the past. So until or unless that changes women have do their part as well.
Girls like jerks because of what society tells us..."nice guys are too nice and boring" and "jerks are fun and better lovers" guess what... that jerks is and always will b a jerk there's no long term love or security being with a jerk. Nice guys will grow with you and most of all keep their promise they made when they penetrated you... and that promise is simple: "i will not hurt u purposely and i will be secretive about our love and only share that love with you" a jerk can't even speak those type of words let alone live them... a nice guy doesn't have to try to live up to a promise because nice guys are truly nice guys...
because a lot of them don't know any better, yet they complain that ALL guys think of women as sex objects or isn't shit. I good reason why so many of them switch to being lesbian or bi. They can't recognize a good guy even when they get to know them. (Im not speaking for All girls but the majority of them)
No. My believe is that it has to do with confident cuz guys like that can charm these naive gurls into fallen for them. They think the guys really mean what they say infact it's all Juz delusional words. If the guy is fun and charming (has to do with comfidence) any cuties would be really interested in them. Cuties these days Juz wanna have fun so those fun type of guys are gonna win them. They don't even think about the outcome at hat the guys could do that to other cuties as well. They think the guy only say those luvly wonderful words to her and all the fun things while on the other side, they ain't limiting themself to one cuties. is the reason why these silly cuties fall for the jerks with "confidence" that every cuties crave for. Condense got chall naive cuties good don't they xP
I think your take is accurate, though I'm not sure if it's clear enough (not blaming you, its a messy issue) to help 'nice guys'.
How do you reconcile:
"And if that comes with honesty, that is a gold mine. "
with
"They don't tell you from the begining all about them nor their feelings toward you. They keep it calm and play it 'cool'.
These seem to contradict. And I'm sure the 'girls like jerks' guys are going to suggest that in fact, women prefer the latter.
I wasn't refering about feelings thought. At the begining is better not to know. I was talking about being honest in general.
doesn't not hiding your feelings come under 'being honest in general?'
What exactly DO you mean by 'being honest'? Is this actually code for 'not cheating/lying?'
Yes. Exactly. At some point we do want to know what are the feeling. And that is part of being honest. But at early stages is hard to take it.
Then I wouldn't tell nice guys you like honesty. It doesn't seem like a plus to you. In fact you want a guy who isn't a piece of shit, but is mysterious and plays a little hard to get (which jerks do naturally because... they don't care...)
Thanks for posting this. I'm dating what you call a "jerk". He's broken up with me a couple times. He's said some pretty harsh things to me. He even had some side chicks. but this last breakup got him thinking. He finally asked me to be his official girlfriend and has been acting so much better. He's been honest. No one approves with me and him being back together but no one has made me this happy. He has a lot of qualities I love in a man. Bruting and wounded types need to be saved too 😊 I love a good mystery too.
You said He's broken up with me a couple times. He's said some pretty harsh things to me. but noone has made you that happy. what exactly does he do lmao. Be rude to you?
So why the hell are you still dating him?
No one is perfect and you won't get anywhere in life by not taking chances. He's trying his best. But I'm not explaining myself to a 21yo.
@genuinelysensitive because he knocked on my door and apologized. Something no guy has ever done. He admitted his wrong doings and that's good enough for me.
@genuinlysensitive *
I hope guys aren't taking notes from this
..."cheat on her, be a dick, then apologize"
No offense but that's a bad example for impressionable desperate guys
Well I was taught to forgive but I set some boundaries and he's doing better. You can't judge and look at everyone else the exact same. I'd rather have a man who sees his faults, apologizes for them and tries to do better than give up and try to find someone "perfect". perfect is boring.
Everyone makes mistakes. There are too many variables we aren't privy to.
most girls go for the alpha males... aka the d bags. I used to love the cocky guys bc you feel protected... thing is now I found a real man one who isn't a jerk one who is super special to me and super sweet. He makes me feel so much more safe around him than any of the d bags i was with
Alpha males aren't douchebags. Alpha males are dominant and do not need to talk loud to set the rulesrules and make themselves noticed.
Douchebags are loud attention whores who try to act dominant and bitch like little girls if they don't get the attention their mommys told them they deserve.
@This_guy_here I totally agree, the "alpha males" i fell in love with, the immature "adult" jerks, were really not ALPHA they just appeared to be ALPHA, well in my search for my ALPHA male I had to deal with all the FAKE ALPHAS to know the REAL DEAL from the fake deal. I don't regret my experience with all the fake alpha males...
Who came up with this alpha male shit? There's men and there's wankers. What makes a man strong is decent principles and a big heart. Take my advice. It's vain men who cause women the most problems. Being vain carries a catalogue of bad side effects with it. Trust me
I kinda agree... Those "nice" girls might be innocent or don't feel good about themselves and fall for them. Other girls might want a “bad boy” but would never give themselves up to a player because they know they’re worth more than that. I’ve never had my heart broken, I avoid players like the plague, even if they show genuine interest or their really popular.
It's funny, girls go after the guys who are jerks and they treat good guys like cracp and take kindness for a weakness! lol the real question is, what does a woman really want? I think that bad boy thing is just a young woman's phase, As soon as she decides to put away the party life and really wants to invest in settling down she'll stop chasing the bad boys and go after someone who's calm and sweet and mature
very true u did it lion's way
Of course it would better if the girl didn't screw half the county first BEFORE looking for a good guy!
Believe it or not, jerks end up being nice and thus they get ditched afterwards, so the nice girls are not really nice :)
I give my personal experience: I'm normally a mysterious guy, when I meet a girl she knows shit about me, she follows me. afterwards when I get used to her I show my soft side and I end up being ditched by her eventually :)