Classic Romance: How To Get it Back

When I listen to my grandparents talk about how they met and how my granpa 'wooed' my granny, it brings me to tears because so much love and thought and affection were put into tiny acts of adoration that eventually he won her over - for life.

My parents the same - they had a courtship, where they went for walks and only held hands, and talked about their dreams and hopes for the future. My father would never even think about not showing up without sme token of affection for my Mum, whether it be chocolates, flowers or a hand written poem he'd press into her hands as they said their goodnights.

Simple, honest and clean romance without the pretences of modern society is what's missing nowadays. How romantic is social media? When someone sends you a photo of a flower or something cute that's been making it ways around online like a meme. It's a no effort-recycled-lazy sort of mating. We rarely have to prove ourselves to each other, and instead of naturally encountering chemistry or creating it through thughtful acts full of meaning and emotion - we orchestrate 'dates' by going online and mostly critiszing and cringing at the dating profiles. It's so rehearsed and so meaningless. There's just no romance to it.

I think these are a few things that men, should create a throw-back movement to romance. Take the lead and remind women what being charmed felt like. It's not about how much money you make or car you drive but how you enchant a lady. And of course it takes effort, but the outcome is so much more magical than the negotiating and interrogation modern dating feels like...

The beauty of a flower is indelible - give some.

Classic Romance: How To Get it Back

The taste of chocolate or candy will sweeten any meeting.

Quoting your favourite passage from a book or a scene from a movie and saying why.



Sitting silently and looking into each other's eyes and giving an honest compliment.



Taling a long walk just holding hands with no destination, just wandering in no rush to get somewhere.

Sharing your biggest aspiration or dream and asking for theirs.


All of these things can either start or end with: Two wine glasses and a decent bottle of wine, a blanket, an open space from where you can see the stars to have a midnight picnic.

P.S romantic music playing from you phone is allowed only if you use it for that and nothing else.


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What Guys Said 18

  • I think a fair number of young guys attempt stuff like this but when it works terribly they learn not to do it.

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  • I'm very old fashioned when it comes romancing, flowers, being a true gentle, hand written letters I do it all. But my specialty is the renaissance way of romance poetry and classical oil painting, poetry being my go to move just today I wrote a Shakespearean poem a tragedy. Oil paintings are only for very special women though because they take months even a year (s) to complete.

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  • I agree, romance is somewhat lost, but much of the blame is on women too. I'm a romantic, I'm not gonna lie, I like all that kind if stuff you said up there, but many women just called being cheesy instead of romantic, and really, it kills you when you hear a girl say that, it makes you think that you're never gonna be able to be like that, and do that stuff.

    I'm not blaming all this on women obviously, because men have the same amount of fault like them. Men just don't put that much effort because if you don't win that woman's heart, well, who cares, I can go out ir get online and meet thousands of more women. The choice is endless so many don't give that much importance to romance.

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  • I did the followers/teddy bear thing a few weeks ago on a first date. Never heard from her again. Women don't appreciate romantic gestures anymore. Never doing that again!

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  • Classic romance is still around, I'm for one a huge hopeless romantic.

    romance is all about keeping things fresh, surprises, being a little cheesy, and understanding your partner. It's simply the art to love someone

    Most people forget how to love someone even though they do love them, it's not loving someone and being there, it's an art

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  • What do I have that the next guy doesn't have that will make you love me as much as I might love you? Is it money? That's a doomed notion. Big muscles? How shallow? Musical talent? Appropriate, but I don't happen to possess it. So what? I have pretty curly hair and mesmerizing green eyes. I'm compassionate. Yet, none of these things attract women. You want romance? Look for it.

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  • I don't have to tell men not to take this advice, do I?

    Just to be on the safe side: guys, don't take this advice.

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  • Why is it that you are suggesting men should do these things rather than women? It's interesting how women are all about abolishing some gender roles and preserving others.

    Do you want to be treated like equals or entitled, special little flowers? You women really need to get together and figure out just what it is you want because you can't have it both ways, and we men are about fed up with your hypocrisy.

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  • "I think these are a few things that men, should create a throw-back movement to romance. Take the lead and remind women what being charmed felt like."

    I'll be honest... this really angered me. Women are the reason this all changed, not men. Women changed, and men have just reacted to that. Feminism has destroyed chivalry, romance and any motivation on the part of men to treat women the way you are asking here.

    And now you think the onus in on MEN to "create a throw-back movement to romance" to bring back what women destroyed? Not a fucking chance! This is just another example of how women want to change things only when it benefits them.

    If women want change, the ball is in their court, not men's.

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  • the reality of this is that women aren't the same as they used to be, I once pursued a girl with that kind of romance and she just got scared of how "serious" it all was, making those kind of sacrifices and making those displays of affection leaves your heart wide open to be hurt as it almost certainly would by modern women- who are for the most part unwilling to make the same sacrifices or commitments you are asking from guys

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  • I find it strange I mean the pure sample romance cost less and its have more emotion in some how

    But these days romance should be in fancy resturant expensive gifts etc it cost more and have less emotion I think

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    • It's because in our society today we lack the true definition of the word "love". We say it with so much ease, without even thinking do I really even like this person or am I just going to say it back to be nice. We changed the meaning of the word tremendously.

  • Things change, romanticism changes, and there's nothing anyone can do about it.

    This is a good take however.

    My GF hates gifts, well at least the ones that "have" to come with Valentine's Day and Christmas. She'd rather get a card and that's it, just like me.

    For me, and for her, gifts life flowers and chocolates are extremely cringy and tacky. They don't reflect anything whatsoever, and it's a waste of money.

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  • read elective affinities of ghoete. you'll find how fd up and poor is our romance today...

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  • What you're talking about just seems to be a lot harder to find in this day and age. Damn near impossible if you ask me. I would love to have something like that but social media, too many strong independent spirits, conflicting schedules, baggage from past/previous r/s, sometimes even a good thing goes wrong somehow. At least for me it's been that. Even when you win you lose. BUT I do like the thought, it's what gives hope, but how long can one person look?

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  • ='(
    Bravo! best take written
    my romantics go often unappreciated!
    i too used to bring flowers, chocolates, poems, little things
    the day a girl told me "why don't you get me something that lasts?"
    when handing her flowers, thats the day i realized the romantics are dead...
    i will never be romantic again, not until i meet that special someone...

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  • I give my girlfriend flowers and chocolates, I give her handwritten notes, and I write poems about her. We talk about our dreams of the future, our future together. I compliment her personality as well as her gorgeous face and sexy body. I do these things to give to her, to make her feel special and loved, and I expect nothing in return.

    When you give from the heart, you are romancing her. When you give to receive something in return, it cheapens it and likens it to prostitution.

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  • I wish I could be as romantic as you stated, but I would feel like a complete creep doing it nowadays. I mean would women nowadays even appreciate it anyways? Or would she just find it creepy?

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  • "I think these are a few things that men, should create a throw-back movement to romance. Take the lead and remind women what being charmed felt like. It's not about how much money you make or car you drive but how you enchant a lady. And of course it takes effort, but the outcome is so much more magical than the negotiating and interrogation modern dating feels like..."

    Nope, no way in hell i'm going to step back to what once were. You want equality, and you get it! You want ME to do that to you, then you do that to me too!
    Sorry girl, but it isn't a man's job to "woo" a lady! If it were then you should get back to the kitchen, stay at home to watch the kids, and do as the man says. Basically just get back to the 20th century sexism you seem to love.

    This is the 21st century, and you need to realize one thing. Men too like to feel loved! So maybe it's time you make men feel loved, instead of believing in the Disney fairytales where the man comes and just sweeps away the girl who has to do NOTHING.
    You want the guy? DESERVE him, WORK to get him! Love is about BOTH working together, and BOTH making the other one feel loved!

    I hope this is a wakeup call for you regarding gender rolles and dating.

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    • um i didn't mean to up-vote you. your kinda an idiot. sorry for the communication.

    • (This is Tinkerbell) if he were a bit more respectful he kinda has a point

    • the goal wasn't to be polite. I'm living by the le-vayan rules regarding how to live and/or love...

What Girls Said 7

  • "It's a no effort-recycled-lazy sort of mating."
    *starts off by mentioning flowers and chocolates, probably the most effortless and mediocre gifts you could possibly buy to your partner*

    As much as I agree with you that people seem to be a bit less cute in the romance department nowadays, I have to say that this is too old-fashioned for my taste. Why should the guy always be the one wooing the girl? Why is it always the guy that has to win the girl over? Women should be just as responsible when it comes to showing their partner affection, doing cute things and buying nice gifts. A lot of women only long for this kind of romance because it's extremely one-sided and selfish. And yeah, it's not as one-sided if you do things together (like taking walks etc) but you're still saying that it's pretty much the guy who should take the lead and plan all these things on his own. Lame.

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  • I totally see where you're coming from. I am not a huge romantic, but I do agree that at times it would be nice for some of the men I go out with to put a little more effort into things sometimes. I'm always grateful when he at least picks up the phone to call me instead of sending a text.

    But we live in a different time now than our parents and grandparents did and it's unrealistic to expect that exact same attitude.

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  • I feel your pain.:D My dad used to get on the bike and drive a very long way to see my mom. They're still so annoyingly happy. Imagine even suggesting that to guys these days.:D

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  • My boyfriend and I used to go to the park at night and it'll be pitched black sometimes. We would hold hands, make out, look at the stars and just talk about anything. Other times, we've gone on picnics (just the two of us) and read aloud our college assignments together. It's about the bonding between the two. I enjoyed the traditional approach rather than the modern approach. We texted of course, but it's our time that we have seeing eachother that sets the tone in our relationship.

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  • I loved this. My parents have been divorced for a long time, but my dad met my mom in a framing store she owned.

    He kept on coming in, asking for more and more pictures to get framed, until finally he just asked her out.

    They told me they used to go on long walks at night together. I think more men should be like this.. sweet and a gentleman.

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    • That is so sweet!! <3 <3

    • I've always wanted to lie under the stars with someone I really like. When you love someone, you should be happy and feel butterflies in your stomach when you're with them.

      I wish it were more like this now. Way too many fake relationships now a days

  • I loved this. I want a love like the ones that my parents have. I wish I could find something this huge and simple at the same time.

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  • I agree that social media has dampened romance somewhat, but doesn't bringing it back fall back on both sexes?

    We're so busy now. It's nice making someone's day with a flirtatious glance, a compliment, smile, or small talk. I think these things can spark a romance. But with social media, people don't pay attention to there surroundings as much. So it's not as fun.

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