10 "We Need To Talk" Topics That Aren't A Breakup!

[Anonymous]

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When you hear your significant other say, "We need to talk," don't panic just yet! There is no reason to jump on the defense. The relationship might not be in danger; he or she might really want to discuss something that isn't so SCARY! Browse through the list below and note whether you've had this topic of conversation with your partner.

1. He or she needs some advice or needs to vent on/about [insert topic].

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2. She wants you to stop leaving the toilet seat up! OR He or she wants you to do MORE around the house.

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3. She's late and she might be pregnant!

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4. He or she got laid off or needs to borrow some money.

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5. He or she might wants to take the relationship to the next level.

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6. He or she wants to make a BIG purchase and is seeking your approval.

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7. He or she might have a serious illness.

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8. He or she did something wrong and wants to come clean about it.

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9. He or she wants to make a change about himself or herself.

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10. He or she wants to let you know that your they want you to fix what you did.

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What was the result of some of your,"We need to talk" conversations? Were you on the delivery or recipient end?

[Anonymous]

I once told my bf "I wanted to talk", it never even crossed my mind that it could be misinterpreted since I loved him so much and was so nervous about what I was going to tell him. When he got to my apartment he felt both nervous and off, and when I nervously rambled on about other stuff he said "*my name* let's just get this over with", that's when I realised what he thought I was about to say. What had really happened was that I had been out of town with some friends and we were at a bar when a guy that I had been talking to earlier grabbed my head and forced our lips together, he knew I had a bf. Even though it wasn't my fault I still felt really bad about it and felt like I needed to tell my bf.

[somuchcooleronline]

Why wasn't your bf invited with you guys

[Opinion Owner]

Because I was in a whole other part of the country visiting a childhood friend and he had a gig in the city back home :) @somuchcooleronline

[WhiteSteve]

This Chappelle routine pretty much sums up everything about "We need to talk"...

https://youtu.be/ivUzfuuJNQI

"Cuz every time she says that, it means we need to talk about some I gotta do... we never need to talk about what SHE needs to do."

[JackKerouac77]

AMEN

[meatballs21]

None of these you'd open with 'We need to talk".

1. He or she needs some advice or needs to vent on/about [insert topic].
"Can you tell me what you'd do in this situation/Can you give me some advice?"

2. She wants you to stop leaving the toilet seat up! OR He or she wants you to do MORE around the house.
"I need your help around here with (x and y)"

3. She's late and she might be pregnant!
"I have some news!"

4. He or she got laid off or needs to borrow some money.
"I have some bad news/listen, I might need a favour, can I run this by you?"

5. He or she might wants to take the relationship to the next level.
"You kniow, I really love being with you/spending time with you..."

6. He or she wants to make a BIG purchase and is seeking your approval.
"We really need (x or y) because (reasons), what do you think?"

7. He or she might have a serious illness.
"Have you got a minute? I have something I need to tell you."

8. He or she did something wrong and wants to come clean about it.
"Have you got a minute? I have something I need to tell you."

9. He or she wants to make a change about himself or herself.
"Hey, I'm thinking of (x or y), do you think that would work?"

10. He or she wants to let you know that your they want you to fix what you did.
"Hey, regarding (x or y), can you do something about it, please? It's bothering me (because reasons)."

[Anonymous]

I've never said we need to talk. My he " need " makes an otherwise reasonable straight forward requesting talk unnecessarily hysterical. I rarely have the word need to convey anything bc unless it's about food that you haven't eaten in days or water or you're homeless Or need medicine, it's unlikely need applies.

Anyhow I dont see why talking About something has to be so forboding. Just say hey when you get a chance I want to talk about x y z. And if you dont say it as if there is a crisis there's no reason fir anyoneto get defensive.

But yeah I don't see why mystery is necessary. Just adds anxiety. Interferes with people being able to listen without prejudice bc they have built up so much before even getting to the talk.

[JohnBhoy94]

Honestly, if you use "We need to talk" in any way other than wanting to break up with your S/O, you're playing games.

If you want to tell him to leave the seat down, you just say " Keep the seat down will you?" -- and anyway, I've never seen the big deal in leaving the seat up by accident or not? Is it that hard to put it down?

[binkamadink]

What if you just found out you have terminal cancer? I think then "we need to talk" is appropriate.

[JohnBhoy94]

"We need to talk" is a really heavy sentence. Any guy who hears that is going to fear the worse. If you've just found out you'v got terminal cancer, where's the harm in softening the blow and saying "I need to tell you about something".

[Frost_Byt3]

My last gf played mind games with me horribly. She would just randomly say "we need to talk" almost once a week, then the topic would just be something random. She KNEW that i panicked every time she did it. It was a living Hell... ughhh

[love2run13]

ahaha thats funny but evil

[Frost_Byt3]

I didn't find it very funny :/

[Anonymous]

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J # opiniontooshorthahaha

[JSmuve]

completely irrelevant to the take but so fucking hilarious!

[dthdhdghadh]

Why not open with that clear identifying line rather than that ominous one?

[dartmaul15]

Exactly. Tell what the topic is!
It both prevents your partner from flipping out and allows him/her to think through the possible outcomes and thus be better prepared for whatever may come.

[LilWeezey]

What do you qualify as an identifier because to me
I did something bad" is just as terrifying as "we need to talk"

[dthdhdghadh]

For example:
I need advice, I need to vent, could you please leave the toilet seat open... you know, all those lines after that dreaded "we need to talk".

[love2run13]

YES! why can't something else be used like, 'hey! can i tell you something?' or 'come sit with me...' or 'can i get a word with you?' or 'come chat with me alone for a sec...'

[peachblossomluck]

I'd struggle with anxiety if a partner said that, I admit.

[Anonymous]

My "we need to talk" is gonna be me telling him I love him

[Starfishlover]

If I was wanting to break up with someone, I just say it right off the bat. No "we need to talk" BS

[Phoenix98]

So many choices and I still got the one that sucked the most.

[DaddyRollingStone]

all of these could be just as bad if not worse.. But I see your point

[Rcjh1987]

I think everyone's initial reaction is Oh crap..