I really need help with a situation involving this girl?

Ok, so I've really liked this girl for a while now, and I always thought that there was something there for me too. Lately I've been sleeping in her bed with her (no sexual activity, just holding hands and cuddling) around twice to four times a week. So...I asked her to my college's formal and she said yes...however...I had a conversation with her today in which I divulged my feelings to her and she told me that she did like me, but that there was someone else that she has been talking to for a longer period of time who she also likes...she's going to his formal as well (two different ones, hard to explain). She also went on to say how she asked him months ago what to do if she got asked to the one I'm going to, and he said she was ALLOWED to go (they aren't dating by the way) and that she wouldn't go if she thought it would hurt him.

Now, I'm confused beyond belief. Does it make sense that she would have me sleeping in her bed with her as if we were dating and still be going after this guy (who apparently hates my guts because I'm taking her out that night)? Am I right to feel like an idiot? What should I do?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Some girls like having that one guy friend that they can be lovey with be only see as a friend. That one guy that they know won't hurt them in the end. She may want you to be that guy. As for your second question, you do have that right to feel like an idiot, but at the same time feel a little bit hurt. The way I see it is that she should have let you know that she wanted that form you. As to what you should do...I'm not really sure on that one. You can try and talk to her about it.

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    • I would say that too, but she did say that she had feelings for me, which is throwing me off

    • In some cases when I girl says she has feeling for you it may mean that she see you as a really good friend. If it is throwing you off then ask her if you guys can talk about it. Dancing around it is not going to fix it.

What Girls Said 1

  • It makes complete sense why she's doing it. She's doing this to you just to keep you around as back up. Is it wrong? Yes, and it's selfish as well, but it's something that a lot of women do. She's letting you sleep in her bed multiple times and night and isn't making a move on you - she's sleeping with someone else. Sorry man, but you will get your point across loud and clear by giving her an ultimatum or backing off completely. Hell, you could even casually mention that you're going on a date with someone else that you met. Tell her because of that, it wouldn't be appropriate for you to continue pretending to be in a relationship with her. 'A classic case of friend-zoning.

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What Guys Said 2

  • Friendzoned AF, take her to the formal and just man up, don't be a pus*y make a move on her, or else you'll be taking her out to eat when she has a boyfriend.

    tl;dr,

    you suck.

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    • You, sir, are an ass.

  • Dude don't sit there and talk another man right into her vagina. Don't let this girl dup you. " Some one else I like" is code word for " I'm having sex or had sex with someone else im more interested in".

    I had more than one chick do that to me. Even a woman I was formally engaged to and she was chasing me. If a woman "has another dude" she likes that means they are messing around/fucking and so on.

    So either man up and go for it because the other dude if he was in your shoes would NOT sleep in her bed and not get in her pants. or stop wasting your time on her.

    it is not your place to be her "friend" and coach her so the other dude doesn't have to bother and get all the pussy.

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