please just read. I really screwed things up and don't know what to do. thanks in advance?

I have been talking to a guy for a couple months now. He has been through some really terrible, personal stuff this past year. He goes through periods of withdrawing and being antisocial. However, I didn't know this was why he stopped talking to me as much at the time. I got defensive and questioned why he was acting different. we got into a little bit of an argument, but nothing major. about a week and a half went by without talking and then I tried to talk to him again and he was ignoring me, so I kind of just went off on him. I said some very mean, cruel, personal things to him that I really really regret. I said them out of anger and didn't mean any of them. he then told me that the reason he stopped responding to me before was because if I got mad about him acting weird, it would only be time before I brought up this personal stuff. I apologized profusely and he said he's not mad anymore and we can be friends, but I still feel terrible. do you think he will ever be able to talk to me again? or will he always be scared I will say something to hurt him out of anger again? Should I just leave him alone and give him time or what should I do? I feel terrible about what I did and really value his friendship and want him in my life. he's a great guy and I want to continue talking to him. should I ask him where we stand, or just let time tell? like should I wait a couple weeks and then try to contact him again? I don't know what to do.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Like what VENOMMM said but don't break off speaking or seeing him all together, pop up every now and them and slowly over the days start trying to talk more to him, plan out questions o keep the conversation going, but make sure they're positive and friendly.

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    • she needs to just leave him a lone for a bit and then do what you said

    • Thank you both! You helped a lot

What Guys Said 2

  • he said he just wants to be friends. you need to leave him alone for awhile , give him his space

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  • I smell something fishy going on actually and I think he is full of it.

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    • I don't know I don't think he is. He honestly has been through a lot, he was accused of raping someone and was kicked out of school until they realized the girl was lying. So he doesn't like social situations and doesn't go out.

    • Well I hope he is an ok guy but like I said I feel a bad vibe or something.

What Girls Said 1

  • I need to get this out. I go through periods of ignoring my friends and never talking to them for months on end. I ignore their texts and calls and barely talk to them. I think you completely overreacted w/the situation. He may have told you personal stuff but you throwing it back in his face was beyond beyond wrong. He probably won't trust you again. I'm bipolar so I frequently withdrawal from friends all the time. The fact that he has been through serious problems the last year should have made you stop and think what could be wrong with him instead of blowing up at him for ignoring you. I honestly really angry that there are people like you out there who barely take into consideration their friends feelings and only think about themselves. I'm sorry but I've had a very similar experience happen to me and I never forgave the person and we are not friends anymore. I think right now you need to let him cool off for a few days. Try contacting him within at least the next week. This will show him that you care about him. But I beg you to never ever disclose anything he told you about to anyone else unless its to save his life or something like that.

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    • I acknowledged that I was wrong and apologized to him. And I never told his business to anyone else. I was always the one there to help him through everything. I just got mad when he was completely ignoring me and blew up I guess. Not saying I was right or that anything can justify what I did.

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