Girls: Is a month of dating too soon to be "official"?

Girls: Is a month of dating too soon to be "official"

  • Yes a month is too soon to be official
    29% (47)24% (20)27% (67)Vote
  • No a month is not too soon to be official
    71% (115)76% (62)73% (177)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

1|0
37|18

Most Helpful Girl

  • I dont think this decision is about time. its about relationship preference. some people lik to be single, others like to be in a relationship. some people hold out the exclusivity card to control the other person into doing what they want.

    im not into trials or being tested so casual dating doesn't appeal to me. (i e. not together but mess around. im ok being friends fits. but thats totally different)

    you are not going to learn things bout a person you're dating casually, that you learn when you are in an exclusive relationship.

    taking longer so you learn things 'you need to know in order to know if you want to be in a relationship', that you will not learn until you actually get into a relationship- doesn't really make sense.

    i think it just depends on whether you want an exclusive relationship or not. if you do it can happen after the first date. if you dont you can date for years know all their secrets and still not want to be exclusive.

    i dont really see what there is to learn before hand. w/e there is to learn, you'll learn it by being together. if you like each other and you are both interested in having a gf bf then i dont see the issue.

    if you just want casual dating then do that.

    if you want a relationship do that.

    If it doesn't work and can not work-break up.

    0|1
    0|0

What Girls Said 36

  • It truly just depends on if it feels right to you both and if you feel comfortable with that. My boyfriend and I became "official" a bit more than a day after we began dating--it depends on how y'all feel about it. If you aren't completely sure, then no.

    1|0
    0|0
  • I did vote no, because who's to say when it's too soon.

    BUT, I don't think I could ever be serious with someone at a month. I like to get to know them before I get romantically attached to them. 6 weeks as a friend is a good time frame...accordingly, at 6 weeks is about when people's 'real' personality comes out.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No.

    It's more than enough time to know if the person is relationship material.
    Usually people know this after the first or second date.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I usually say it's official when we declare we're dating or not long after our first kiss. I like to know if we're dating or not so I just ask, whereas others are happy to spend months wondering if they're an item, if they should tell someone, if the other feels the same, if they're rushing it etc. I really don't know why put themselves under so much stress. It's called asking a question.

    0|0
    0|0
  • How do you two feel? If you're both ready, of course it's not too early.

    By official, I presume you mean asking her officially to be your girlfriend (and if anyone's dating another person they'd stop doing that)...

    0|0
    0|0
  • I have been asked many times to be exclusive after only one date-and yep those men did not work out. However if someone took a month to ask me to be exclusive-that would be an issue. I only date one person at a time anyway, so I am exclusive before the first date. Most people should be that way.

    0|0
    0|1
    • "I have been asked many times to be exclusive after only one date"

      Wow.

    • Yes and it never worked out because they wanted to go fast all the way to the aisle. Never trust someone who goes too fast.

  • i think so its not as another 106 people agree with me lol cuz its long enough to know the person ur dating and normally people tend to be comfortable when they know a person this long

    0|0
    0|0
  • dude what do you mean exactly by official? introduce the person to your family?

    0|1
    0|0
  • I'd say.. get to know her, don't think about being 'official'. Tags can ruin the start of new relationships sometimes. One can feel pressured while the other is perfectly fine with a new 'title' to your relationship. I'd say, just say you're both dating exclusively. That should be enough.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, it isn't... But you can generally tell when your relationship begins to more into an 'official' stage. If you find yourself asking, then maybe it is a bit to soon? But if your both happy and content and things have been going really well, then no, it's not to soon

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, I don't think so, depending on how both of you feel is most important, one might be ready before the other so.. it can depend.

    0|1
    0|0
  • I think it depends on the situation and two persons. If it feels right and it's for the right reasons to start a relationship then why not.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, I don't think that's too soon! Go for it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I think it depends on how intense your feelings are for each other at the time and how both of you feel about it. If they mutually are, then yes. If not, no. Like Prof_Don says, there are no hard and fast rules here.

    1|0
    0|0
  • A month is definitely not too soon if neither of you want to date anyone else. My guy asked me to be official 6 dates in, when we had been dating less than 2 weeks. I'd rather be exclusive with a guy if I like him. By asking me to be official, it showed me where he was at which was nice because girls always want to know what guys are thinking!

    0|0
    0|0
  • A month is not a long time with a person but its long enough were you should know if you wanna be with them or not.

    1|0
    0|0
  • My boyfriend and I were "official" after only two weeks of dating, and now six months later we're stil working out great :) not too soon

    0|0
    0|0
  • Definitely not too soon. I don't even do the dating thing. I just skip to a relationship.

    1|1
    0|0
  • i think thats plenty of time

    0|0
    0|0
  • My ex and I were officials after 1 week and we stayed together for 3 years and half ;).

    0|0
    0|0
  • imo, a month is the normal time to become official. As long as it's been more than 3 dates

    0|0
    0|0
  • No, a month is perfectly fine

    0|1
    0|0
  • A month is plenty of time to get to know each other. If you both agree that you want to be exclusive with each other by all means stick a label on it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • no not at all. its definitely official after a month. but u guys should talk it out, just to make sure, be casual about it, but also be serious. so he knows that

    0|0
    0|0
  • Honestly, its whatever makes YOU happy and if you feel like this person is right than its right. No one else can tell you whats wrong and right. Only you and your partner knows when its right. If you can't see yourself dating anyone else then do it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • It depends on how serious the relationship is from day 1.

    0|0
    0|0
  • you need to be at the point where you can talk openly and honestly about your needs, wants, expectations and desires.

    0|0
    0|0
    • why can't you sort that out in a relationship?

      im not disagreeing that you need those things to sustain a relationship. but to get into one you just need to want to be in it.

      sooner you do, the sooner you'll know if it works or not.

  • Depends on how much time you spend together.

    0|0
    0|0
  • no i dont think a month is to soon

    1|0
    0|0
  • I'm in the same situation right now. I've been seeing this guy for almost a month and I have no idea what we are. He told me I'm the girl he's willing to take a risk with to be in a relationship, but hasn't asked me yet. I'm not that patient so I hope we are official soon.

    0|0
    0|0
  • More from Girls
    6

What Guys Said 18

  • Ideally, meeting someone and going out on a few dates with her to then become official following a month of dating is not my dating modus operandi.

    In my opinion, being an official couple means that there are very few stones left to be unturned between two people. Personally, such a feet seems highly unachievable after a month of dating someone under normal circumstances.

    To answer your question, nevertheless, I suppose it depends on the length of time a couple has known each other and the level of trust and familiarity between them prior to their commitment to each other.

    Personally, I would look askance at anyone who wants me to commitment to them after a short time span of dating them. My experiences has taught me that many people do not present themselves in genuine form early in the dating process. Thus, I think it's best to be cautious.

    But, hey, that's me. You should do what's best for you.

    0|1
    0|0
  • In my opinion when its right, its right, and you know it, and if the two of you are sure about it sooner, then hell, be official sooner..

    3|0
    0|0
  • Not at all, a month is plenty of time for most people to have noticed anyway.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Depends on what "being official" means to you. The only hard and fast criteria is a Marriage license, and yeah. A month is too soon for that.

    Everything up to that is up to you though. Define your relationship for yourselves and enjoy it without trying to fit it into someone else's model.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I don't believe in concrete rules when it comes to dating... if it feels right, be monogamous quickly.

    Go based off of feelings :-D

    1|0
    0|0
  • it depends on some things. First off it depends on how much of your time you spend with them during that month. Also some girls have more baggage and things you will not find out about until later while other girls don't have a lot of baggage and there will be less problems becoming official sooner.

    0|0
    0|0
  • "official", what's dat? You meet once, meet twice, meet a few times -many times more. There's no certificate, no ceremony, no registration, no permission required.

    0|0
    0|1
  • I'd say that by that point, you should at the very least discuss where your relationship is going.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I know I'm not a girl, but no, a month is not too short a time to decide to become official. Honestly, any longer and I would think one or both of us was just wanting to put it off and be able to see other people.

    0|0
    0|0
  • it actually depends, but once the girl brings you to her parents and formally introduces you to them.. That's the time you know you guys are in an official relationship

    2|0
    0|0
  • Its more about agreement than time.
    You just gotta talk it out.
    Last girl I was with, it was official even before our first date.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No whatever rocks both your boats.

    0|0
    0|0
  • for me yes man.. i did this once and it was a mistake, jesus..

    0|1
    0|0
  • its always too soon to be official.

    1|0
    1|1
  • it all depends on how strong the feelings are and what was done on said dates

    0|0
    0|0
  • Yesssss vote a

    0|0
    0|0
  • My new girlfriend and I have been seeing each other for a month and we made it official last night :)

    0|0
    0|0
  • Me and my girl went out thrice last summer, thrice last winter. We chat every day on Facebook. We're still not official yet.

    Extreme example, but to each their own.

    0|0
    0|0
    • That doesn't sound like a proper relationship though so I can see why.

    • and you probably live far from each other.

    • Yups, quite far. We don't stay in the same town. We also don't study the same courses/subjects in school. She's also very conservative (slow pace) and has other priorities in life at the moment (busy).

      But we share the same hobbies, so we communicate a lot with each other. We've been friends for over 2 years already, this was how it'd always been. This dating thing is just something new in our relationship.

Loading...