Big&tall guys are at the bottom of the dating "food chain", right?

I'm a college guy and I'm 6'4 at about 225 lbs. Now I know there's bigger and taller guys out there but this seems to be an already undesirable figure for women. I'm in football and basketball too so I'm pretty athletic so not the typical fat guy couch potato but still, overweight.

A lot of people tell me that girls supposedly like big & tall guys. How can I find those women, I'e tried everything, approaching taller girls, heavier girls. No results so I'm starting to think there's something wrong with me.

Any tips on how to get a girlfriend, not one night stands, in my situation.

I know losing weight would be best and I'm trying it's just not that easy for me, plus I'll never have an Abercrombie model body.

Updates:
Everybody, I'm sorry if I was imprecise. My weight is not just muscle it's fat also especially around the abdominal and chest area.

0|0
12|9

Most Helpful Guy

  • Some girls like big strong muscular tall guys. Very few people find big (as in fat) attractive. If you're in the first category you've got no worries. If you're fat, you better have one hell of a personality or a lot of cash.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I'm sorta both and that's my issue. I can bench press 200 pounds and do hundred push ups but the excess fat ( stomach&chest ) is undeniably there.

    • Show All
    • Yeah it's what keeps me busy and sane while having no girlfriend. When other people date I hit the gym.

    • Activities outside of the gym might introduce you to more non gym rat chicks. Hiking, boating, running, etc.

What Girls Said 12

  • Since when did that figure become undesirable? It would be good for me. My fiance is 6'4". I'm 6'1" so most guys have always been close to my height. I don't think you're overweight either.

    Maybe there is something about your approach that's holding you back.

    0|0
    0|1
  • I don;t think you need to lose additional weight if you are healthy the way you are and you like how you look. Don't lose weight JUST because you want to attract girls, lose weight only if you its harming your health or if you yourself are dissatisfied with your body.

    And about getting girls, there is no limit set in our minds regarding height and weight. I guess its something more than just that, its your face, the way you talk...the way you behave all that is taken into consideration. So try to be just who you are (unless you are mean, then try to change) and sooner or later you will find her :) Don't always keep looking for her or else you will be disappointed most of the times and there is no fun in that :P

    1|0
    0|1
    • I think you underestimate my weight I have a considerable stomach. I've actually had girls tell me they'd consider me if i wasn't fat it's just with stress at university and work I often resort to comfort food. It's my biggest weakness.

    • Try eating healthy, it won't only help you with your weight but also reduce the stress you are under. Its a win-win solution. Plus, trying to avoid food which is increasing your weight will also teach you self control. But you don't have to give up your comfort food altogether! Start with baby steps.
      And please, you don't need to have an Abercrombie model body -_-

    • Thanks! I'm really trying cause all I want is to go on my first date and maybe get a girl where she does not feel like she's settling for me.

  • From your height and weight only, I would totally date you =) Sounds like you're strong enough to throw me around :p Although I'm 5'3", some guys don't like a difference that large.

    Maybe it's something more on your personality, or demeanor, or the women you approach just happen to be intimidated by your size. I'm not saying that you are intimidating for women, but I have friends (tiny Asian girls, so I think they're used to Asian guys' height and build) who are intimidated by big guys.

    0|1
    0|1
    • I guess my personality is not that great. I am pretty shy and try not to draw attention to myself. I guess it's because I've been burned by so many women especially in high school. It's hard to be confident if you're ashamed of yourself.

    • Show All
    • I hope so. I'm definitely giving it my all. I'm almost sure I won't be pursuing women for the time being, not like it's working anyway, just to spare myself the rejection and really "do me" for a while.

    • Yeah you can focus on yourself. Best of luck!

  • You sound fine. You're at an advantage being 6'4" already. Short fat guys are at the bottom, definitely not you.

    4|0
    0|1
    • That's what everybody says, that there are chubby lovers out there. Never lead to me getting a date though so I guess my approach is shit too.

  • I dont know who to get a girl, but you are have you tried the tall girls at your college, and why are you trying to loose what, that makes NO>...sense to me

    1|0
    0|1
    • I'm trying to lose weight to become dateable. It's become increasingly hard though, working out and doing my sports I could eat a cow after lol

    • Show All
    • With that individual muscles split I meant. If you wanna go for upper/lower Buy BCAAs, won't cause any of muscle. Hell it preserves muscles like bish and won't loose you any even if you even loose 10 pounds

  • There' sounds like there is nothing wrong with your height and weight. I am tall myself at 5'11 and I had an ex that was 6'4 and around the 200 pound mark and he wasn't fat. You just got to have confidence.

    1|0
    0|0
  • Okay, first of all, most girls think tall guys are sexy as hell. Being 6'4 would open doors for you, if anything. And 225 is not "big" on a 6'4 frame. BMI is retarded. There's nothing wrong with that weight at height.

    1|0
    0|1
    • Maybe I gave the wrong impression. I'm not at this weight with pure muscle. I have a considerable amount of excess fat, quite a stomach. Some is muscle though.

    • Show All
    • So you're saying I can basically try with every type of woman. My issue is 99% of the gals at my uni are really fit and beautiful.

    • You're just psyching yourself out, bro. They are just people.

  • No , big& short guys are

    2|0
    0|1
    • Thanks for your answer!

  • 6'4 @ 225 doesn't seem fat to me... Most of the girls I know don't really care if a guy isn't ripped. Personally I find muscles bulging unattractive. Healthy and happy are just right.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Thanks! I'm far from ripped though :(

  • Okay you're reaaaaally tall, lots of women would love that especially if your athletic, and 225 and 6'4" isn't big. Maybe you have a bit of fat in areas but it doesn't seem like too much and you could probably tone up pretty easily FOR YOURSELF. Because honestly I don't think losing weight is going to help much as that doesn't seem to be your problem to begin with.

    I think girls may be intimidated by someone like you. I'm sure lots of them find you attractive. I bet they find you so attractive and masculine that it scares them! I knew a basketball player around your height who liked me, and even though he was kind and even the quiet type (which I love) I was still intimidated by him for some reason! I wish I didn't screw that one up! Then, I met another guy who was around 6'2"-6'3" I was also intimidated by him at first but then he showed me his cute side and his flaws I was no longer intimidated by him. The point is that maybe you come across as too "alpha" and girls are intimidated by your masculine energy. Its likely if you are approaching shy girls or good girls.

    1|1
    0|1
    • Wow you are a very kind person and I wish what you said would be my reality. It's not but of's nice to imagine :) I know for a fact women are turned off by my looks so I was wondering if I might find a girl who was willing to look past them without feeling like she has to settle which let's face it she kinda would.

    • Show All
    • There is no perfect body. Everybody, and I believe EVERYBODY has something they'd like to alter about their body. I looked at your pic...you're not obese. Every girl I know would rather date a fat nice guy ( ur not ) than date an asshole who is arrogant. Would date a girl only for her body? Self esteem trumps a toned chest and stomach...

    • So I'll have to try to approach more women. It's just hard for me to believe they might like me and that's why I don't do it anymore cause it has never worked out sometimes them giving my weight as a reason. Thanks for the input!

  • you sound hot but im too short (5'0) lol guys like you don't like me haha

    0|0
    0|1
    • In senior year I actually loved a girl like you but I ended the relationship because I was too ashamed to get physical with her.

    • Show All
    • Thats not true - I'm over 6' and I love 5' to 5'4"

    • AidenBlue, nice to hear it ^^ haha i love guys your height but i've always felt self-conscious that they'd think im too short..

  • There's absolutely nothing wrong with you. 6'4" 225 is pretty hot

    1|1
    0|1
    • You might not realize it but with this weight my BMI is at roughly 27. In the ugly face of reality this means a stomach that is too fat and some kind of man boobs. So that's the reality women would have to deal with when dating me.

    • Show All
    • Yeah I never get any signals from girls or they say no. So I'll have to wait for sure.

    • Definitely! :)

What Guys Said 8

  • i don't know being 5'7 145lbs I feel like I could say the same thing. I've definitely been told I'm too short to date by some girls.

    just depends on the girls you're meeting. everyone has different tastes. if someone is so superficial to judge you solely on your height or weight then they probably aren't someone you'd want to be with

    0|0
    0|0
  • have you had a lot of concussions? height is one the first things that women look for in a man. go to any dating sites and they want height

    0|1
    1|0
    • Yeah they want height but that's not the only thing.

    • its the first thing they look for

  • I'm where you are. Just let it come to you.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I wouldn't consider that big. Tall yes. I'm 6'1 and 215 and feel pretty light I wanna hit some 240. dat der celltech.

    0|0
    1|0
  • I think you got it backwards bud

    2|0
    0|0
  • Believe me that's nothing to do with attracting chicks. Hell I am kindaish that. Sure we do well out on field but Chicks? Haha They are easy as they come if you got game. Id say attend lot of parties and keep em banged ha

    1|0
    1|1
    • I guess I have no game whatsoever but I also think I would definitely have no chance with the typical party girl wince they are quite often looking for very handsome men.

    • Show All
    • Okay, how am I supposed to know your name is Troy? I don't know you jeez.

      Well you kept mentioning how you used to be and that you used to be nice, that people used to be mean to you. Something very pivotal in your life had to have happened. I know what that's like so I was just saying I that i hope you found peace and happiness, though I have a feeling those things still effect you.

    • Ha its ok and hell no they dont.

  • nah man, there's definitely ladies who like a big beefy guy. I think the worst thing to be is probably short and super fat.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I'm tall, not big, and I've never had a girlfriend. I guess they're not into tall guys like us (I'm 6'1'', 165 lbs).

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...