I feel sick to my stomach: I asked a girl to catch a movie, and she "rejected" me because of cultural reasons: now, this... am I over-reacting?

I like this girl (we are 22) and was 90% sure she liked me back, but she has VERY strict parents and in her culture/religion there is NO DATING or time alone with guys... anyways, I asked her if she wanted to catch a movie (the day after her mom yelled at her and made her cry for being home later than 10PM)... she waited an hour to reply and told me she was going to lay low on the going out for a while so that she can get on her parents' good side again. I was worried it was rejection, but she texted me the next day to talk to me...

Today, I go online and she had posted a picture of her going out to a MOVIE with her BROTHER... now, I know that it's a little bit different to be going to a movie with a family member than a potential romantic interest/a different guy, but now I'm sitting her with ANXIETY through the roof and feeling like I'm going to puke... am I over-reacting? Is it different because it's her brother?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You are overreacting, just calm down :)

    It's just her brother. My parents are very strict too and before turning 18 I was very limited and could only date a guy if my parents approved. Also sometimes they would say: you have been too social. So I needed to get away a bit haha. But I still had to and was allowed to be social with family members.

    This makes my parents sound very harsh, but they are okay. They just didn't want me to get too influenced by my friends back then which I understand now. They were pretty unstable.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Only advise I can give, it will be not good idea to push her further. I feel she is already stuck you and her family. It is quite a difficult feeling.

    Let her deal with that on her own for the moment. You can't do anything. Be with her, and support her if she needs.

    After, you and her both can try to gain her family s trust. But a real one, not pretending. Let the family know you.

    Do you really like her? Because it will be very difficult for both of you. It will take time, you have to be patient.

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  • you're over-reacting. She probably likes you but the way her parents are acting right now its cheaper if you guys do not date, because her parents probably banned her from dating and grounded her from going out unless she's supervised. (aka her brother and other family members)

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  • I say since it is her brother her family is ok with since it isn't a love instrest

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  • I believe you are over reacting. You have to understand that not everybody's have cool parents. Going with her brother is totally different that going with you. She was able to go with her brother, it's better than staying alone in her bedroom. If she manages to date without her parents knowing, that moment was apparently NOT a good time.

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What Guys Said 7

  • www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1026229-i-feel-sick-to-my-stomach-i-asked-a-girl-to-catch-a-movie-she

    Makes you look kind of pathetic to just copy and paste the same question when people have already answered you.

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    • I know :( I have bad anxiety issues and can't take uncertainty lol I always feel like if I can just get ONE more answer I can finally relax... never happens though lol

    • The thing about girls from other cultures are that their parents are often strict. They want their children to date inside of that culture. That's not to say they won't make an exception if you're respectful, willing to learn and convey to them that you are not trying to be a negative influence on her.

  • I'm just curious but what the heck is she? a culture with no dating policy? all I can think of is a culture where arranged marriage is the norm (Indian/Arabs). It almost sounds to me like she tried asking her parents if she can go out for movie but they told her to go with her brother instead.

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  • Cultural differences should not be taken with a grain of salt. If the individual is not strong enough to break the mold, it's not going to work. She doesn't sound like a rebel and she certainly didn't think twice about showcasing her great night out. There's no more juice left in this one... It's dead. Into the trash bin it goes.

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  • "her culture/religion there is technically NO DATING or time alone with guys"

    Muslims, again? I'll be blunt; in my opinion, their culture is so overly strict and so backwards-thinking rather than progressive, that it is just not worth the hassle to deal with it. Based on my personal stance on this, it'd be easier to just look for someone who doesn't have that many limitations behind her back.

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  • Yes it is completely different to be going to a movie with a family member over a potential romantic interest considering her parent's behavior.

    You are completely overreacting.

    Find the next girl who doesn't come from such a background.

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  • Yea your overreacting it's her brother dude, if it was another guy yea you got rejected but she is not aloud to hang with guys full stop.

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  • My opinion but if she said she avoiding you because of culture reasons, if I were you I'd stay as far away from her as possible because not only would you be dealing with her you'd be dealing with her family on those issues too. Find another girl.

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