How do you meet people to date while you are in your late 20's and early 30's?

I'm having one heck of a time meeting people. Problem is as I'm older now, I don't go out as much at all. Friends stay in more, I prefer to stay in more.
I've signed up to online dating but I lurk in the shadows mainly. No picture, but really don't find myself interested in anyone else on these sites anyway.

Just curious to hear from others. Sometimes I do feel like I wish I had plans. Always was desired in my early 20's, but I went out more often. I wouldn't mind going out for dinner and having nice conversation with a man. Going for a walk with a man, enjoying the nice weather. Even if it doesn't get serious, I would just like to have the company sometimes. You'd think that part would be easy.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm in a similar situation.

    The times I go out, it is usually hanging out with the guys. I'm a little shy, and a lot of my hobbies are generally male oriented; In my college graduating class, we had three women. Add introverted hobbies to the mix, and that makes a social life a bit tricky.

    I work alone, too - and when I DID work at "Co-ed" companies, there are non dating clauses in our contracts, even if I was interested in the women at work, I wasn't allowed to date them without losing my job.

    All of this cuts my social life significantly. But I'm working on getting a better social life. The trick, I think, is "small steps." Develop more interests, but start small. Go for things tht aren;t too far out there for you right now.

    You like cooking? Take a culinary class. Like reading? Join a book club. Like costume design? Take a sculpture class or sewing class, or go to a comic con; and you can learn this stuff, practice your craft, and meet people who like costume design. They also have some interesting costumes, so there are built in conversation pieces right there.

    My friend is a performer - he decided to take a dance class because he figured it would help his movement become more natural. He laughed because he was a "lumbering idiot" - but he said how much he had learned, and how much he wished he had done it earlier, and how much it's helped him. You wouldn't necessarily think of dance as helping an actor (unless his role required it), but it's an idea that is sort of related to something he's passionate about.

    Find something similar to what you already like to do. Think of a way to do that with people who have similar interests. Expand your interests (slowly), and go from there.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Same situation as you. Couple things I've notice. Location, population of where you live play a huge part. I grew in a small town w/ a large retirement community. It was SO hard finding single women my age when i lived there. Once i moved to Metro. San Diego it became easier meeting girls. The matter of the fact is it gets tougher if you never leave the house.
    I hate recommending finding people at a bar but someone below mentioned trivia night. It's actually a good idea as Trivia night brings in a crowd that would normally not go to a bar.

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  • depends on what you want. its going to be harder at your age.

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  • You need to get out more and do stuff that you enjoy. Not only you will meet new people, but you will meet people that you already have something in common with. Ex: church, dancing, hiking groups, classes at your local community college, trivia night, etc.

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What Girls Said 1

  • do you have any hobbies or interest, you can take up?

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