A fear of my bf leaving me.. is this Ok or am I just paranoid?

Considering the fact that my father left me and abused me at a young age.. and how all of my past friends just abandoned me.. I always thought it was my fault.. I really really REALLY like my boyfriend.. I'm scared if I get too close to him he'll just leave me all of the other people who left me..


0|0
2|3

Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm so sorry that happened to you, let me just take the time to say well done for doing so well to still be here and you must be a really strong person :)

    My dad died at a young age and that caused me to have a lot of the same sorts of insecurities and fears you do, feeling like no one will be around for ever or that they'll abandon you. It's a horrible feeling but it's one that will go away when someone proves themselves to you and you become safe and secure in a relationship. If this guy you're with hasn't given you any reason to suggest he's going to leave give him the benefit of the doubt. Try to enjoy being together rather than worrying about a future that you can never be certain of no matter how much you try to control it.

    The night before my dad died I was worried for some reason that he would leave, and I told him that, he said to me he was never going anywhere. If I've learnt anything from that it's that life is too short, it's too short to worry about what could or couldn't happen. Just enjoy the time you have with people and whatever will happen will happen but don't be afraid to love and be loved :) It's part of living and it's what you, of all people, deserve :)

    1|0
    0|0

What Guys Said 3

  • Just bring tell him how you're feeling. If he's a good boyfriend he will quell all of your fears :)

    (and for future reference, you should always try to bring this kind of stuff up with him. Being good at communicating with each other is a key to a strong relationship.)

    0|0
    0|0
  • Boyfriends leave, that is why they carry that label, they are rentals. The big problem is your father and his action. You possibly need to join a chuch which will expand your self worth. You can not let other people define you. You have a father in heaven ask him to step in with the support you need now in your moment of need. Simple.

    0|0
    0|0
  • don't get too worked up over it. if you must, tell your boyfriend straight up you're afraid of losing him.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 1

  • He probably will leave you sooner or later. Don't get too close. I've had similar problems in my life. So I'm not talkin to you about that open up and love bullshit. I'm talkin to you about self preservation. Don't get too close. Because every time you get your heartbroken you're gonna revert back to that lonely little girl who just got left. It's better to learn to be alone and then be pleasantly surprised than to look for love find it and have it leave.

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...