At what point should a guy just seriously give up?

If he's in his early 20s and has less experience with women than a boy in 7th grade, is it time to just call it quits?

I go to college and there's hundreds of girls here yet not a single one is into me


Most Helpful Girl

  • At what point should a guy just seriously give up?
    I don't do should or shouldn't unless it pertains to harming children/animals. So for me the point a guy is suited to give up is when he starts having obsessive desires or contemplates homicidal 'revenge' on gals for not wanting him.

    "I go to college and there's hundreds of girls here yet not a single one is into me"
    Egh have you asked out those hundreds of gals to be able to state with certainty they aren't into you. I find when guys use such extremes it's more of that they've asked out what they feel is a lot of gals and based on that feel every/most gals don't want them.

    Either way if you feel/think not a single gal in your environment is into you that suggests to me the issue may be you. Perhaps it's your approach, personality, character, attitude, etc this is excluding that you are hideously deformed.

    I'm aware that it seems most guys claim that the only possibly flaw they have and the only possible reason a gal won't date him is because he's nice however perhaps evaluate yourself for why gals may not want to date you and try resolving them if possible.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • There's no reason to give up. get to know girls as friends first, heck maybe they can even give you advice or introduce you to some girls they know. for me personally i dont become very interested in someone until they show a lot of interest in me and start pursuing me (its just how i am). but if someone is for sure not interested than move on, but dont pass up on having some friends who are girls cause they can really help you out. Dont stress about relationships though, especially since you're only in your early 20's. work on improving yourself and boosting your self confidence, girls are attracted to that and even aside from that you should do things for yourself not just to please others.

  • Trust me when I say there are hundreds of girls at college who are thinking the same thing as you. And how do you know till you've asked them all? Each girl has her own taste. Even the strangest of guys get amazing girlfriends. Unless you can read minds, don't give up!

    • They're not into me you can tell

  • Oh my goodness, bite your tongue! You are so young with your whole life ahead of you. Don't ever think it's time to quiet, unless you wanna just end up unhappy and alone. I did that for a while, just avoided dating due to being hurt, I accomplished good things at work, but realized I am happier when I have someone than being alone.

    • Thats because you can get someone. I can't

  • 3 Words: never give up!
    There are lots of men who have trouble with women. Don't get discouraged, just because it's hard. I understand that it's difficult to believe, but someday you will most certainly find a girl who loves you for who you are.

  • By call it quits do you mean to castrate yourself? Lol

  • Step back and evaluate what's happening. This is slightly outdated, but good: If I'm So Wonderful, Why Am I Still Single?: Ten Strategies That Will Change Your Love Life Forever by Susan Page

  • Early twenties ain't nothin Bo. You'll find somebody.


What Guys Said 5

  • I'm a virgin who is turning 29.

    There is no giving up. Even if you try to 'give up' you'll just end up feeling internally frustrated, lonely, self-pitying, and going through bouts of mega depression. If you are dumb, you'll come to wrongfully hate women as a result (especially pretty ones who are unsympathetic to loneliness). If you're smart, you'll realize that they aren't at fault for not like you AS YOU CURRENTLY ARE.

    However, if you at least start dating (even practicing with women who you aren't attracted to but are interested in befriending -like with fellow dude friends) you'll feel a lot less helpless and maybe learn a few things.

    If there's anything I've learned it's this: women like what they like. If they don't like you, and you want them to like you, you need to become what they like. You are going to need to do research on the silly question of 'what do women really want?' and try to emphasize the traits you have that fit the answer (s) to that question while muting out the traits that do not.

    I started online dating like a year-and-a-half ago, and I have to say that I am a lot more confident and even more physically attractive as a result (I learned how to diet and work out properly, experimented with my facial hair and hair style, tried new fashion, and learned how to take better 'selfies' for portrait pics -as silly as that sounds. I look at older pics of myself and I can kind of see how I was unattractive before and how I am sort of more attractive now.) I also learned some things I didn't realize before about dating (like how to have a 'better feeling' light-tonguing kiss rather than a 'mwah'-sounding grandma kiss, and ideas to try for early dating).

    • My advice is thus this:
      1. Improve your physical appearance
      2. Practice being social with women (try to see how long you can have a NICE conversation using online dating sites, for example)
      3. Stop being you and start living like YOU (as in who you want to be). What makes ultimate you attractive? What does he do daily that makes him so mansome to the ladies?

    • I think improving yourself is a great thing to do to make yourself more confident and those who dont give up are going to be the ones landing a great successful relationship. Keep doing what you're doing and keep positive! :)

    • A lot of people go through life with a "I don't care what other people think" attitude -which is great, but problematic if you apply that principle to everything (especially if you are trying to appear attractive to other people -yet you don't care!).

  • And in three years after you get your degree you'll be making bank and look back on this question and laugh.

    • I dont want gold diggers. And at this rate Im not so sure Id make it past three years

    • Show All
      Say it on your own thread.

    • I can say it because none of them are into me. I guarantee if I asked any of them for number or to go out they would say no

  • Don't give up there will always be that one person who actually will see you as the one they need.

    • Thats just not true

    • I'm telling you buddy I'm 20 as well and I've seen it happen as well to me.

    • It won't happen to me. Probably have better odds with the lottery

  • Quit? I'd say that's a more of a reason to stick around and reach new horizons.

    Never shy away from a challenge! Always embrace each and every single challenge in this life. You'll be a better man for it.

  • Lost my virginity at 28. Strangely, while getting laid before then seemed damn near impossible, I haven't really had any problems since.

    It's weird, but sometimes shit just is what it is.

    • That's good to hear, man.

      I could have given it up a few times, I think, but I have stupid standards and a fear of experienced women that has kept me deprived: a self-inflicted curse from hearing a friend talk about finding the right girl, giving each others' virginity to each other, and 'growing' with each other sexually and romantically.

      But I might be too old to experience that myself, and I'm more upset about it than I should be.

    • I was kind of the same way. I wasn't about finding myself a virgin, but I wanted someone that I really connected with, y'know? I found her, and things were great for two and half years. Then she decided she wanted out, for one reason or another (I never did get the truth of the situation). After that, while I still want that perfect relationship, and I still look for women I connect with, it's different somehow.

      I think mostly, I just better understand how flawed and human women really are. I think it's good to have standards, but you need to understand that at their core, women are just people. They fuck up and do stupid shit and everything just like we do. There's nothing mystical or magical about them, and nothing mystical or magical about sex.

      I wish I'd really "got it" when I was younger. I may have missed so many opportunities to find the girl who was actually right for me instead of the one that I thought was.