Recently, my best friend since we were 14 and I decided to take the next step and begin a relationship. That's when he mentioned his very ill grandfather that he always takes care of, is a racist. Tonight he said his grandfather used the n-word so he called him out on it and told him that I am black. He told me he doesn't want me to meet him anymore. His grandpa wants him to move in and help him around his house full-time when his lease is up, but my bf says that this situation is paramount to his decision -- which means a lot to me<3 Anyway, I'm not upset or anything cause at least his parents like me, but has anyone else found themselves in this type of situation? Did it affect your relationship?
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Good question. He may die soon but in the meantime it needs dealing with. Fortunately old people start becoming like children again and can be treated in an uncomplicated, childlike manner. He has been indoctrinated as a youngster and has had insufficient life experience to open his mind. It really is quite sad. I don't think he can be won over in debate or conversation. It's an opportunity for you to see the benefit of defeating prejudice with love, humor and kindness and to be the one to confound his ideas through your actions. If you ever meet him be as kind, friendly and loving as you can, and don't bad-mouth him. It is also another chance for your BF to display that he has grown up and has his own mind. Chances are the parents will sort it out.1