I wanted to send a girl a message?

I wanted to send a girl a message over facebook. I couldn't do it. This girl so gorgeous and I want to get to know her, but I am afraid she will just reject me like every other girl! I keep telling myself to stop it, no girl ever shows interest, and then I always push myself to disappointment over and over again. I know her cousin, her cousin is my best friends girl, or I don't know maybe I should say ex-best friend. We are no longer friends I should say because one of the reasons is he cheats on his girl with different women every week. I really wanted to send her a message. I couldn't think of anything to say. I figured I just say that I wanted to break the ice and say hi but I have been in a lost of words. I don't know what to think, what should I do? Should I just accept the fact that no girl will ever want to get to know me or should I man up and face another rejection? She is one of my Facebook friends

Updates:
I've decided not to message her. You all can make fun of me that I have no confidence, and that's fine. My confidence has been destroyed! By the very people that I wanted to trust them with it!
I couldn't message her. Just because I know her cousin and her boyfriend and all the drama of him cheating on her. I messaged this other girl I was interested in, and she rejected me quick. I'm done pursuing love. I've had enough! Lost cause!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Send the message, what's the worst that could happen? You know she deserves better than what she has and why shouldn't that be you!

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    • SO if a guy messaged you that what would you think? I really do not know what to say, so I was thinking of just telling her the truth. That I wanted to break the ice and say hi, but I'm in a lost of words. How would you react to some one sending you that?

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    • You will make enemies... BUT, is it worth it? You can't save everyone so pick and choose your battles. You seem to be an upstanding guy so I hope everything works out for you.

    • Thank you. I hope too. I want to be the guy who falls in love for once. I have sat back for way too long watching women throw themselves at people who do not care about them

What Girls Said 7

  • If you have met this girl and talked to her a little in real life, I would think it would be okay for you to FB message her. Don't move to fast! Take it slow! That works better. And, eventually, you will find the right girl. All the breakups are leading you to her. For all you know this could not lead to another breakup! Just say hi and ask her how her day was etc. Be brave! I think it will be fine! If she isn't really interesting in started a relationship, don't freak out and get angry. Just accept it, and maybe she will eventually come back to you.

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    • Never met her. I know her cousin. Her cousin tells me all the time that she see's me as her brother because I'm best friends with her boyfriend, or was best friends. Sadly, she does not know that he cheats on her every week

  • If you initiate a conversation already thinking you are going to get rejected then you will likely get rejected. Girls like confidence and they will be able to sense your insecurities by the way you talk to them and the overall way you carry yourself. You have to improve your attitude and think more highly of yourself. Just message her with the intent of getting to know her and letting her get to know you.

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    • From a guy view, I think that is the reason why relationships fail. Because the real men are most likely shy and the ones that were stepped on. The cocky ones have girls throwing themselves at them. Then they realize the cocky guy they go after does not care about them, but they can't go to the shy guy who does care because he was backed into a corner that gave him some resentment! The whole confidence thing is one indoctrination that is part of destroying our generation. What ever happened for just liking somebody for what they are worth?

    • Carrying yourself with confidence IS the way girls measure your worth, at least during your initial interaction with them. You can't carry yourself in a way that conveys desperation or girls will think you have nothing to offer them. Also, you make it sound like there are either shy men or cocky men and nothing in between. That is not true.

    • Unfortunately I have been stepped on too much. Confidence is not something you just gain. How do you expect me to gain confidence when there has been so many girls that have been mean to me? Deep down I am always going to think she is going to be the same as the rest of them! I'm sorry, but I just do not trust women! I have every reason not to!

  • It's all about your confidence. Don't be scared just go message her. Just do it.

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  • Just send her the message you'll never know if she will reply if you won't try. What if she does reject you? Will know you that at least you tried instead of the thought of what could of been.

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  • You shouldn't be afraid to talk to a girl, girls like It when you message them first and besides as long as you don't cheat on your girlfriends (like your cousin) then i wouldn't worry. Just talk to her like you talk to your friends..
    Hey
    How are you
    Blah blah

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    • I have tried it, they do not take any interest in me! And that guy was not my cousin, he was my former best friend

    • Why don't you try complimenting her on something everyone lives that even if they don't show it :) try to gain more confidence to, and friends to back you up :p if you don't have that much confidence try making friends with ANY girl first so you no what to talk about with girls and then you can work your way from there :)

    • I meant love not live :/

  • Message her. Just go log on, click on her name and message her. No hesitation. You'll never know unless you try. Good luck.

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    • But what should I say?

    • Start it off with basic things such as, 'hi, how are you?' And go from there

    • What about her cousin and my former best friend? Read my comment to Cleveland please

  • If you are afraid to say anything try poking her on Facebook or something to see if she pokes back!

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What Guys Said 3

  • Ok, you have a really bad attitude towards yourself. You seem really negative and gloomy about all this. If you are showing even a hint of this when you try to talk to girls, this is why they may be not interested. Message her on fb and just make small talk to start with. Say hello. Asker how her day was... Talk about recent movies, or shows. Read her profile and see what she likes and bring that up. It isn't as hard as you are making it.

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    • Tried it so many times with other women. Never worked for me!. I am just skeptical for the reason why she would be any different?

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    • Even though that is all I see is more of the same?

    • Maybe you are tunnel visioned.

  • Man up, say hi and ask what has she been up to today, think about how what kind of questions you would like to receive in a casual conversation. It's clearly easier over facebook, then maybe later up meet her IRL for a coffee or fast-food or something like that, the important thing is just to talk to her, don't apologize for talking too much, ask questions and leave her alone once in a while (chatting every night isn't a good choise)

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    • Thank you some good advice!

  • Send her a message. If you are self confident about it, the message will sound better.

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