Guys should provide more in a relationship?

So there is a girl who I have been seeing for a week, and she said that day (in response to a joke) that a guy should always provide more.

What does she mean? I thought these days this "Providing" concept is supposed to be equally balanced, or if the girl truly cares for me she should not say this in first place... ? right?

  • Yes
    29% (2)17% (1)23% (3)Vote
  • No
    14% (1)33% (2)23% (3)Vote
  • Avoid her! She is a digger
    57% (4)50% (3)54% (7)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
She also said things like these:
>She likes to get mad sometimes at me and wants to scream and yell at me
>She is lazy and doesn't want to cook or clean the house
>She doesn't want to even TOUCH each other before marriage (only holding hands)
How can she be so upfront about these at such an early stage of dating?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, as a girl whos been the one to provide more, I dont think she's wrong.

    my older relaive once said to me that a man should always like a woman a bit more than she likes him, and a woman chasing barely ever works for the long run..as they lose respect for her.

    Also, i hate to genralize but sense you guys generalize women who say this as a gold digger, Lets just say that some males dont like when a female can provide more and it throws things off bad usually. Like the guy feel inadequate.

    A woman can provide more but how rarely does this work out with out the man feeling emasculated?

    Equal I dont think works, like a girl buying the dinner and wooing the guy? what is she getting out of it and when you do it what do you get out of it? sorry i feel like men woo and stuff to convince the girl to choose them and they get to have the *goodies*

    I am not a goldigger but id like my husband to be doing a little better than me, especially sense men are actually PAID higher and not objectfied in this rape culture half as much as women.

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    • Generalize? I am talking specifically about this woman only. Not a group of women.

      Also, I am okay with paying more for her, in fact I know a guy should, it's a sign of being a Gentleman. But the FACT that SHE was so upfront about it (said it Herself) makes me doubt whether she is more materialistic/ a gold digger.

      And ofcourse girls who are dating guys just cos of their resources are Gold diggers, right? Just like guys who date girls only for sex are called Players...

    • Show All
    • Well, she's prob not...haha I see and I'm sure you'll find a girl that will do *something and she will find a guy that will be as old school as you say she is x) this probably helps no one waste time too

    • Yes you are right :) i dont want to waste either of our time on this haha x)

What Girls Said 5

  • I don't know if she was referring to financial things or emotional things. My boyfriend is more emotionally invested I guess. But that's just because I am not an emotional person and he is. I think both genders can provide equally financially, and I think they SHOULD both be able to pull their weight financially.

    The only issue I see with what you have stated is her enjoyment of getting angry (for no reason?) and screaming and yelling at you.

    I think it's good and refreshing for someone to be up front about those things in the beginning of a relationship. It's good to know where the other stands sooner as opposed to later so if you're on completely different pages you can part ways before you get all tangled up emotionally.

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    • But just into 6 days of knowing each other, she has so many demands...
      I imagine how many more are coming up, and how many more will be there in 6 months?

    • That is a little extreme. I wouldn't judge you for leaving her. I was pretty blunt about where I stood on all those topics as well, but I waited for like a month lmao. And I think I said it nicely. I just sat him down and was like, "Just so you are aware, this is where I stand on this this and this. And don't think you'll change my mind on any of it. You won't." And he was like, "Okay." But he also stood where I stood on most of it so that was good lmao.

  • My bf is old school. He opens my door, doesn't let me walk on the side closest to the street, wants to pay for everything, etc. Every once in a while, he'll let me pay for something or will let me go in half. Even though my bf is like that, I don't think it has to be that way.

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  • Well really in my opinion nothing will ever be equal, unless you really want it to be equal. Technically though females and males are pretty much the same if you leave and the body parts.

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  • She sounds like she's using you... just keep and eye on her :// and on your bank stuff too

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  • I totally agree that both the guy and the girl should put equal amount of effort in a relationship. If a girl says this, in my opinion, she is playing hard to get and trying to turn you off. These types of girls are trouble.

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What Guys Said 2

  • It depends. I am a guy and there is no way that I'll let a girl provide even for herself. Even though things have changed this time around, I feel that providing is one of the things that makes a man. I will never go on a date with a woman and let her pay for herself. That's just me. On the other hand, the fact that she's saying it herself, there's a problem. The woman should never be up front about things like that. It just makes her seem like a digger. Don't dump her just yet but be watchful. If you see she wants to take advantage of you , then you should pass.

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    • exactly how I think. I mean, I also want to provide for the girl and it's a sign of being a Gentleman. Unless absolutely necessary, I want to pay and all. but she is telling it from herself... so that makes me very cautious now.

    • She also says things like these:
      >She likes to get mad sometimes at me and wants to scream and yell at me (I was like, WTF? For small small matters of me not texting her for 1 day?)
      >She is lazy and doesn't want to cook or clean the house
      >She doesn't want to even TOUCH each other before marriage (only holding hands) :O :O

    • For the touching side, she's like my sister and understand her. It just shows how much she's a good girl. You should also be forward with her about the house issues. If she wants you to provide, she has to also do her part. If she gets mad because you don't text for a day, that's a sign of her loving and missing you.

  • Girls should provide more because they don't do anything in a relationship most are lazy and think the guy should do everything

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