Why are girls given so much crap for rejecting guys?

The last time I rejected a guy he basically told me I was wrong for it- like "you didn't even give me a chance" etc. And I told him that I really liked another guy so I didn't want to date anyone. And he was like "but you're not dating him!"" ? Wtf. So?
And the two girls that know him were telling me that I was being "heartless" and that it wouldn't kill me to give him a chance. I had only met him once and he asked me out through text like a week later. I had zero attraction to him and he seemed unintelligent. I don't HAVE to give anyone a "chance." And I was nice when I let him down.
And then this other guy (a friend) asked me out and I let him down kindly as well. And he told me that there's "better ways" to let a guy down (even though I had said "I'm sorry I'm just not interested in you like that. ")
And he acts like I owe him something. If I don't text back he gets mad, gets offended if I cancel our plans, etc. And another girl told me to give him a chance too. I do NOT like him at ALL.
I'm tired of this. These Are just two examples.
If a girl DOES NOT LIKE A GUY why should she be made to feel guilty or like she owes them something?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Rejection is a part of the parcel of life, if a person cannot handle rejection and failure then they'll not get very far in this life.

    If I ask a girl out and she's not interested, then that's perfectly acceptable. Preference is preference, attraction is attraction and I don't have a divine right to be with the person in question.

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What Guys Said 15

  • the guy is just hurt and so he is reacting trying to make you feel bad. simple as that. you're right you don't owe him anything and you didn't do anything wrong. basically it's a blow to the guys ego so he reacts defensively

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  • hahaha. doesn't look like there's a problem with you. looks like there's a problem with those other people. forget about them. you did as you desired. nothing wrong with what you did.

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  • She should not feel guilty. And it hurts, but a guy who is mature should be able to handle it. However, this is my opinion, I think girls should hold more responsibility for leading guys on. If you did not lead either of these guys on then tell them look at the way they reacted to what you told them and tell them that you are looking for a more mature guy.

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  • Not at all. Some guys are asses when facing rejection. I understand their mindset even if I disagree with their responses.

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  • Ach. I think we men have two stages.

    1. Younger. We get upset about getting rejected and take dating and girls way too seriously.

    2. Older. We learn not to give a damn if some girl rejects us or flakes out on a date.

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  • I'm pretty sure it's a media influence. Don't think too much of it, people are stupid under the age of 18. If you're extremely curious about how the thought process works, I can tell you, because I ran into the same mistake - it's really stupid. You basically just have to treat females as "Female Entities" rather than people, who are bound by social obligations to date you if you ask them out. It's really dumb.

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  • If guilt controls you people around you will use it without even realizing they're doing it. Not just people who want to manipulate you. Everyone.

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  • Its bullshit, I know. Men's egos are ridiculous.

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  • nobody wants to be turned down. besides, women do the same thing

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  • As the old saying goes some people can't take NO as an answer

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  • It's not that they reject guys it's the way they do it.

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    • I've never rudely rejected a guy and I know very few who do

    • That's good. When you soften the blow it doesn't make us feel like total losers

  • Tell them "f* off. not interested" next time. They won't respond to that.

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  • What needs to happen is that guys from the time they hit puberty need to be taught that they don't need a girlfriend in order to be happy or complete in life and if they can't get a girl, that doesn't mean that they are losers, or lames. Then guys would be able to handle rejection, but I think that roles should be switched because a lot of females claim that rejection is easy to handle and get over.

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  • She shouldn't feel guilty. But guys get even more hate for rejecting girls. Believe me: I know from experience. At least MOST guys handle rejection with dignity and don't see it as a big deal. The same can't be said for most girls.

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    • I've never seen a girl take rejection badly but then again very few girls ask a guy out

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    • Not surprising, man. Oh, well. At least that kind of reaction lets you knwo that you made the right choice.

    • @portis26 sorry I just now saw this. But I guess your story doesn't surprise me much. People in general need to learn to handle rejection better.

  • You're not in the wrong. Fuck the haters, keep doing what you're doing. Be polite but be direct.

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What Girls Said 4

  • The rejection hurt their ego so they lash out.

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    • yeah this too. but im surprised they took it that way. it happens lol.

    • @ BertMacklinFBI - Once you've been here a bit. You will see a number of threads from guys who are women haters to the extreme. Because these guys can't get dates. And it is totally the women's fault. Just because 300 different women have rejected him 300 different times. It couldn't possibly be his issue. Could it? No. No way.
      It's quite sad. But quite humourous how the constantly go on about it.

    • @ironeddie you are the ONLY guy so far too see how misogynistic some men on this site are! Thank you so so much omg

  • I think they were just hurt. But you did nothing wrong. You were honest with them and thats what counts

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  • It stems from the belief that women owe men. That because he showed you attention you should be lucky and be greatful to him. It's ridiculous.

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  • Fck them. You don't owe any of them anything. You were kind in letting them know you were not interested and just because they are children and don't know how to handle it, doesn't mean you should date guys you are not attracted to.. that would be cruel and unusual. The people who told you to give the guys a chance need to mind their own business.. it is YOU who would be dating them? how dare those people assume they have the right to tell you to date someone you are not interested in. Pssshhhhh

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