Guys-I need your input on dating and body image?

Ok, so I am starting to talk to this guy who I really like, he is really fit and handsome and I am very petite and fit and outgoing which is why I think he is attracted to me. However- when I was 15/16 I went through an extremely difficult time with anxiety and depression which I had to be on meds for-some side affects of the medication was increased appetite-and along with a mood stabilizer I honestly didn't know that I had gained 100 pounds within a year. One day I looked at a picture someone took of me and started hysterically crying and couldn't believe what I looked like. I got off of the medication and got a clear head and lost the 100 pounds. But...now I have stretch marks literally everywhere and I am so ashamed and disgusted about them because before I gained the weight I had always been really fit, which makes me even more mad at my situation. So my question is--- are all those stretch marks going to make him say "omg ewwww" I am so worried about what he'll say. It's funny to me how I get hit on all the time and everyone loves my outgoing and funny personality but I'm hiding such a big part of myself by always covering up. by the way I am a 22 y o attractive female. Everyone asks why I've never had a boyfriend and why I am a virgin- if they only knew what I went though...


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Most Helpful Guy

  • This sounds like the most cliche answer in the book but I believe it: If he doesn't accept you for who you are, then that isn't someone you want to be with. Simple as that. If it is really bothering you (about him, or anyone else not knowing) you could always sit them down and explain it. In all honesty, if I was this guy and I really liked you, and I happened to see your marks one day (and they are as bad as you claim), I would actually be afraid you were in some sort of abuse. And I'd be afraid/concerned for you and ask you about it, and try to help you.

    if I was really interested in a girl and she told me what you said, I'd appreciate the honesty for you opening up to me. Knowing that you trust me and care enough to tell me of that. That is just *me* however, and I can't speak for your guy friend. But again, if he says, as you put it "omg ewwww", you don't want to be with someone like that who doesn't like you for yourself. Seriously. Be very proud of yourself for overcoming that time in your life. Who cares if it left some visible marks on you? I wouldn't. I'd wear that like a battle scar. I have a pretty hefty scar on my back from a cancer scare when I was 18, and I wear that almost like a badge of honor (I'm 20 now). Different scenario, I know. But it's somewhat applicable. You came out of that scenario better than you went in, so you don't need to cover them up for anyone. And if this guy thinks their gross or whatever, you don't need him. I hope it all works out. Also, I took the time to do some research, and if you are *really* that self conscious of your marks, here are some possible solutions for you. Unfortunately, I'm not a high enough level yet to post links, so message me if you want me to PM them to you. But the best one is be proud of yourself. Best of luck.

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    • I love the battle scar illustration <3

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    • Thanks for your input and thank you, I feel better :)

    • Glad to hear it. And I'm not just saying that. I really am happy to hear that. Also that I could be of service. Best of luck with your endeavors :)

What Guys Said 4

  • It would put me off if I saw that and didn't know about it, a lot, not gonna lie.

    However if I liked her to a point where I would be finding out, then it wouldn't bother me in the end, just very suprising there and then. Wouldn't be pleasant to find out, but I would have understandings for it, and in the end be cool with it.

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  • they have cream you put on to get rid of stretch marks it's at most all drug stores like rite aid or walgreens

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  • If he says omg eww then thats not somone you want to be with..

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  • my reaction would depend on how severe the strech marks are.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Holy moly you sound like what I went through with the meds and weight gain. Like exact scenario, once I got off them I lost most the weight too but had stretchmarks. They do/did fade. The reddish ones fade and are temporary. The white ones do not.
    Though I alway recommend girls this Kat Williams video:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj5-71ziM5c

    ROTFL. So true though.

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