His best friend is hitting on me?

My friend James and I have been good friends for around a year and a half. Initially I didn't have feelings for him and only thought of him as a friend. It's always seemed a lot like he likes me as more than a friend though he has never explicitly told me that. The last couple of months I've developed really strong feelings for him and would love to go out with him. But I'm worried he will never return the feelings because I "friend zoned" him for so long. I'm also really worried he actually isn't into me and has never been and I will make a move and our friendship will be really awkward. As an added complication James's best friend has recently been hitting on me, messaging me a lot and wanting to hang out.

So I have a couple of questions.
Does Pat hitting on me mean that James doesn't like me? Because surely if James liked me his best friend would know and not try anything with me. Right? Or is that not true?

Also what should I do about liking James? Should I say something? I would have no idea what to say without making it incredibly uncomfortable and difficult for us to be friends

Im so confused about both of these questions, I have no idea what to do. The more help and details you could offer me the better!


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Lots of questions... I'll start off with the friendzone thing and it maybe being awkward afterwards but here's the deal things are only awkward if you make them awkward. It's really not that big of a deal if you like a friend and they reject you. This is only a train smash if you make it out to be but when you remind yourself that this happens to many people and is normal then you can feel more comfortable when things don't work out. Initially it might seem weird but then naturally the intensity of the situation fades. I only say this cause I have been there... I have had friends like me whom I rejected and have also been faced by rejection from a close guy friend too. With time it gets better. So please don't let that stop you from following your heart.

    As for his friend hitting on you.. it doesn't necessarily mean that James doesn't like you. Guys are different when it comes to these things. They're not like girls. We girls are prone to backing off when a friend like a guy but I have seen that guys are not this way. For them it's not a big deal. There are exceptions but I wouldn't count on it.

    I think you should make a move on James. Your feelings aren't going to go away soon. It's best to put your heart at peace by dealing with the situation. Ask him to hang out more, flirt with him and ease him up towards the potential of you liking him. Don't do everything at once or else it could be overwhelming for him. If things don't work out you then you know you tried and can peacefully move on without wasting your time. It's better to get things sorted out otherwise you linger on something, waste time and end up missing out on other opportunities to meet the guy of your dreams.

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