Why are women deemed less desirable, less attractive to the majority of men even when they are in their 30's? early 30's? are women in their 30's?

really considered old to most men? even early 30's women are considered past their prime to most men, why is that? are men just that cruel? or is life just that cruel?

Updates:
Is a woman's maturity not as attractive to a man as a mans maturity is to a woman's? Because women in their 30's are more mature than their 20's counterparts but yet most guys in their 30's and older are still pursuing women in their 20's

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Before answering, need to make a few key points:

    -> many women in their 30s are still very desirable. Many women PAST their 30's are very desirable.
    -> most women do not consider men -more- attractive when old. Some do. But lets just say that on average, men also look worse as they age.

    Why are women deemed less attractive in their 30's? Because on average, women are less attractive by their 30's. Note that many are still VERY attractive, but unless they were out of shape in their 20s and got in shape by their 30s they are probably not -quite- as beautiful as they were.

    The same is true for men, though perhaps a little later, men's attractiveness probably drops 5 years later then for women.

    But with men, it matters much less for a whole variety of reasons:
    - "Youthful" isn't seen as universally desirable in men. Some women, like cocochanel below, like boyish, 'pretty' guys, and women like her WILL find younger men more attractive by a fair margin. But her attitude is probably TYPICAL of men, where it's a minority of women. And there's another minority of women who actually prefer some aging to a man's face, some creasing, some signs of having 'lived', maybe a touch of salt and pepper. This is a minority not a majority. But the majority don't mind those things much. Plenty of men find lots of 40 year old women really hot, but they find them hot in spite of being 40, they don't say things like 'well the wrinkles make her look sexier'.
    - Looks are a smaller part of what attracts women to men then vice versa. They matter, but not as much. So a decline in men's looks changes their overall attractiveness less then a similar decline in a woman's looks. Meanwhile some of the things women care about that men don't care much about - seeming wise, confident, secure, having a good career, being calmly authoritative, having interesting hobbies and experience - can improve at least into middle age. So men are getting some things to offset aging women don't...

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    • - From what i've seen, women seem to consider most men 'okay' looking. So the decline between a 25 year old 'okay' guy and a 45 year old 'eh, he's okay' guy is not that big. Men really find the average 25 year old woman hot. It's not so much that 35 year old women have fallen off a cliff, as it is that 20-25 year old women are on a pedestal that men NEVER reach, unless they are extremely successful.

      In any case, that's what happens to the overall average population. As a woman, your attractiveness is your attractiveness. It doesn't matter what's happening to the average. In fact, in some ways it's too your benefit. while some late 30's men are dating early 20's women, may of them, if settling down, are balancing attractiveness with compatibility in life, and may be aiming for women more like early 30's. And if most of them have gotten fat and wrinkled, and you're taking care of yourself well, your attractiveness - relative to women your age- might be improving.

    • sorry been away for a while, but anyway, it seems to happen a lot that women in their 20's date or hook up with men in their 40's and 50's

What Guys Said 17

  • Hell no! Are you kidding? That is right in the middle of a womans prime. Sexy, mature, understands guys better, knows how to please a guy. Best time ever.

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  • I have found that women in their 30s and 40s are in their prime, making them desirable.
    They are reaching their sexual peak and are not afraid to use it.One of the horniest ones I had was 50 and could just keep on going, whether oral or vaginal sex.I have experienced that they are more confident in themselves, and less caring about what others think.Just look at the cougars scooping up the young guys.Those guys think that they are plenty desirable!
    Darling , life is very cruel

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  • 1. The most obvious reason is the fact that men are attracted to signs of youth and fertility.A lot of indicator of attractiveness fade as we age - skin becomes less smooth.other markers of attractiveness tend to fade.
    2. Higher percantage of women is married in their 30's than in their 20's. And women who are not looking for realationship put less effort in their appearance like : they stop wearing make up and they put on weight. unless they partner is realatively attractive so that they are afraid of losing him to another woman.
    3. There are of course exceptions. I bet most men would pick this 35 year old women over vast majority of girls in their late teens or early twenties. Actuall she looks better in this video than when she was younger. But she's an outlier of the outlier of the outlier. The thing is as you age your attractiveness is more reliant on strong facial bone structure . It holds true to both men and women.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zrlkeynTlCY

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    • i guess life is cruel in many ways

  • Sorry, but if I want kids, I want a fertile girl.

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    • I'm 33 and have four kids. Being in your 30s doesn't mean you aren't fertile.

  • Women's prime is in their late teens to mid 20's, for many reasons.

    Women in that age group are way more attractive, they can have babies way easier if they want to, and they are easier to please. And a big plus--they're often at the easiest, happiest point in their lives. A cheerful, happy girl is a way better date than some stressed out woman who's put in 40 hours at some horrid job and is bitter from being pumped and dumped, or messed up dating bad guys, etc.

    Attractive women are like trust fund babies who have inherited all the money they'll ever make, and they have to either spend it or invest by 28, 29, 30 or so.

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    • Oops, I mean... "Smarter, experienced women are way sexier than those 21 year old sex kittens. You go giirrrll, the men your age just can't handle you!"

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    • the attractiveness of people which includes how they age and perceived age. literally every man (and woman) who approaches me assumes i'm 18-21 (they themselves are often from that age group, but older too) and we're having a conversation and i tell them no i'm not a uni student and i'm not living at home. it's not like they run away when they find out i'm in my late 20s. it doesn't matter at that point. i'm the same way, from dating and general people-watching experience, men peak at 19-22 and i find that i am most attracted to that age range BUT it doesn't override everything. i don't select by age but by looks.

    • Coco, that would make you the exception. :p If you're 28 or whatever and look 20, then kudos to you. Good genetics and living right, huh? Fact remains though, you're the exception to the rule, and most women at 30 don't look nearly as good as they did at 20.

  • Harsh statement coming, a lot of people have let themselves go by their mid 30s. I happen to think a woman is at her peak in her 30s provided she has kept herself up.

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  • nooooooo there are tons of sexy women in thir 30s.don't worry! :-)

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  • I've been super attracted to women in their 30s so I don't know..

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  • i don't think they are

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  • That's nature. Women date older. Men date younger.

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    • visually-inclined women date younger ♡

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    • Good for him, if that's true.

    • Not just rich people...

  • some are still desirable i mean the milfs

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  • because most of them have children. a child from a nother guy makes you pretty much a non sexual object to me.

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  • Ok, so, you sound like you know the reason.

    Are men cruel? No, I don't think it's cruel to want someone and not someone else. Are women cruel for seeing poorer men as less desirable? I don't think so. Is life cruel? Life certainly can't be cruel. Only a person can be cruel. There's no point in avoiding reality. You have to accept what is metaphysically given. No amount of wishing that men's desires were different will change them.

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  • Anyone older than 25 could be considered past their prime, male or female. Don't worry too much, there will always be someone who will like you. Just as importantly there will always be someone younger than you too.

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    • are you serious? in the ages of 25-40 you are still considered young.

    • I don't take that claim seriously, but a lot of stupid people seem to think once you're out of the 18-24 age group, you're out of your "prime". You might not be a senior citizen but you're slowly declining. Personally I think it's a bunch of bullshit.

  • Men just age better usually. Life really is that cruel. I personally will only start dating women in their 30's in maybe another 4-5 years. It's not due to looks but it's just easier dating younger girls. Women my age are just more difficult to date.

    Plus the way i see young girls constantly tanning and the way they party... 30's is gonna' be tough wall to hit. I've run into women that are 7-8 years younger than me that actually look older than me it's crazy.

    Ultimately, you're way of thinking is part of the problem. Looks fade, having an attractive personality doesn't. So if you're one of those women that has relied too much on your looks, getting older is gonna' be hard for you.

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    • Some men do age incredibly well. Some men do not. The sad reality is that aging affects some men and women harsher/rougher than the rest. For example dark skinned men and women age slower (naturally) than light skinned men and women. Then you have genetics and general health care play into the mix.
      i.dailymail.co.uk/.../...A000005DC-214_634x434.jpg

      vs.

      i.huffpost.com/.../o-BEIGE-SUIT-570.jpg?1
      A 40 year old guy with a beer belly and receding hairline is not more attractive than a slim 20 year old guy with a full head of hair.

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    • i agree with that. I think blonde, white women age the worst/faster actually.

    • It is a fact that we white people/light skinned people age faster than minorities/dark skinned people. It was believed because of the lack of melanin in our skin made our skin age faster. But new science suggests that we don't have as many Telomeres as other races because we are the "youngest" race.

  • I don't think that's true at all. Men in that age range find women in that age range very attractive. And sexually, women in their 30s are usually way more desirable than younger ones.

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  • I don't think that's true. I find many women in their 40's very attractive. Of course, at any age, you have to put in the effort.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Some men think that way and some mern don't. The reality is that people are going to date who they want when they want.

    You'll see older men with younger women/men.
    You'll see older women with younger men/women.
    You'll see people of the same ages dating.

    In most cases economically stable older people are attracted to younger people because of their looks and naivity. Younger people are attracted to older people because of their economic stabiliry and assumed maturity. This goes for heterosexual and honosexual people.

    However as long as you take care of yourself. Are mentally healthy, and don't hold persepctive partners to the failures of your exs, then you'll always be attractive to someone.

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  • This is depressing...but I've heard it for sure...I was raised to believe that once a woman gets older she is less desirable...and is a burden to her family if she isn't married by 30...which is stressful for me because I just turned 30...as a 16 year old I thought 30 year old women were ancient...but now that I've hit this age...I can say that I don't feel any less desirable by the opposite gender..(well...I suppose with the exception of most Middle Eastern men...they probably wouldn't give me a second look if they found out my age, which seems to be a big deal in the culture)...I think it really has to do with how a woman takes care of herself...and genetics...at that age...

    And for the person that wrote he wants children...women can have children in their 30s...this is so common...if a woman does have difficulty then there is technology...I'm not worried about my fertility yet...on both sides of my family women have had children around late 30s/early 40s with no problem at all...no need for medical assistance.

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    • Get a ring on it, you jooooooooooooooocy chick :)

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    • That's a good point...& that's what I'm really hoping...I doubt it knowing my parents...but fingers crossed

    • Ya fingers crossed :D

  • Well, I'm not in my 30s yet.
    I'm in my late 20s.
    I get looked at by a lot of guys that are teens, my age range, and much older.
    I think you have to sort of look mature but youthful.
    If you have that look, it's appealing to a lot of guys.

    Some women in their 30s look tired.
    And some look great.

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  • they are not considered past their prime they "are" past their prime. and that is in both genders and is nature. but the difference between men and women is that women's attractiveness is very related to their bodies, that is a fact, and bodies break very soon while men's attractiveness is more related to a mental maturity that will be there even when they get old.

    one has to find other things to care about than her fading attractiveness when she gets older. that is why it is better for us to have families and children when we age, because we won't feel wasted when we get older. you can't act as a 14 year old girl when you're 35 if you do you will be disappointed because those days have passed. we should have our fun in younger ages, raise our children in maturity days and see them being attractive as we were one day when we get old. that is life.

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    • hehehe "they 'are'" :)

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    • @one has to find other things to care about than her fading attractiveness when she gets older. that is why it is better for us to have families and children when we age, because we won't feel wasted when we get older.

      that does not sound like a reason to have a family. it sounds like a reason to go out in the world live fully and make a life for yourself full of contributions that dont fade or grow old.

      build accomplishments that dont cheat on you when you age bc to them you're no longer attractive, or grow up and leave, bc they dont need you anymore.

      IF womens attractiveness is mostly related to their bodies then the last place thy should dwell is an an environment thatis going to, in a few years see them as a washed up...

      marrying a guy bc he finds her attractive for a few years -bc her attraction resdes in her physicality whereas his in his character-makes for a completely pointless existence for the woman.

    • esp bc marriage ages women quickly... . shsused up in a bdecade.

      if womens attraction/ value, is bound in their physicality, obviously the LAST thing they should do is marry.

  • It's a load of crap, even at my age, guys are hitting on me all the time of all ages. Men SAY lots of things but in reality, they WILL still chase after woman of all ages.

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    • Only if they've kept it together, sista ;) You must be jooooooooooooooooocy.

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    • looks are part of very package men are no exception.

      the guys that have that kind of relationship where looks dont apply to them, will cheat bc who the the hell wants a partner who thinks 'wow i love your maturity, its ok that your body disgusts me sweety, no worries.'

  • if you're saying that, i assume you live in a small town or something

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  • no ! don't let it happen to you !

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  • Because their ability to have children is going down by that age

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  • Women, in general, accept more physical flaws than men. Men don't age better, women are just more accepting in that way. If you don't get fat, guys will still be interested. Most guys don't stay hot enough to bag girls who are 10+ years younger and many lose interest in dealing with the maturity gap.

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  • Depend why kind of men are they. If they are looking for younger women well we aren't desirable. Less attractive. Older women know what they want from men, where and when without stupid mind games. At my age (37) young men as older ones find me attractive, desirable, beautiful. And that makes me feels great lol. "Older women are like a good wine, the older the better" (hope i said it right hahaa)

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