Why does dating involve so many "tactics" and play so many games?

Why can't two people just be honest with how they feel about each other? Why use strategies and tactics in order to be with someone? Nowadays it seems like you need to play so many games in order to obtain someone, why not just be open and honest about the relationship and how you two feel


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I completely agree with you! I hate games, but this is exactly what I am encountering now that I am back in the dating pool.

    You can't seem too eager or you will scare them away, or they lose interest! If you aren't eager enough, they think you aren't interested.

    I just don't get it. I've tried several times now to just be honest and open and that has gotten me nowhere. I am just a friend because I am so honest and am willing to talk and have conversations. Yes, I am a girl who gets friend-zoned because I am laid back and honest.

    It really sucks when you get to know a guy and like him a lot and he seems to like you, but then he's 'just not feeling it' because you are so easy to get along with. But then he goes and gets with someone who is difficult because she is exciting and challenging. I'm not saying that only guys do this, as I know it goes both ways. I just find it frustrating being someone who is honest and open about what I want, only to not find the love I want.

    It really sucks, and I totally hear where you are coming from! GRR! :P

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What Guys Said 5

  • read about the psychological theories of transactional analysis. It posits games are a natural thing that occurs between 2 people for various outcomes.

    for instance the game "see what you made me do" exists so that person A can avoid blame and responsibility by laying it on person B.

    thus games are inherent in social interactions.

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  • women want relationship, commitment, loyalty, love etc, where as men mostly are in to sex. so this meeting thing is like negotiation, and a defensive act from a female to know what is coming to her.

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  • You should not want to be with anyone.

    You should want to date someone, to find out if they are the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

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  • Tell me about it, and due to insecurity most of the time in my opinion.

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  • Shit, if only more women saw it your way.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Neither side wants to be hurt; therefore, neither side shows vulnerability.

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