A guy said to me, he wants to build a relationship with me, how will I know he is serious or not?

I just met this guy through online dating site, he's located in US and im here in philippines. He said that he just deleted his profile in that said site, because he wants to focus all his time on me and wants to build our relationship? Is he. Being serious? How will i know that he is serious about us/relationship.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Time and his actions.
    Only time will tell. The most discreet, subliminal actions of his will give you some insight as well. This is a high risk situation where you can't just rely on the lovely tone of his message, the charming, engaging vibe to his words... but what his actions say.
    For example... does he actually mention meeting at some point?
    Does he make an effort to do things just to make you feel special? Do those things seem to be sincere and not geared towards some sort of personal gratification?
    Is a large portion of your connection revolved around sex/sexual initiation/sexual dialogue/ sexual requests?

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    • Show All
    • Trust me. My heart is in the right place here and I have been in your shoes. Two online relationships majorly impacted me. The first one took place when I was 15 with a 22 year old man who did not have his sh*t together and manipulated my emotionally vulnerable state. The second took place when I was 19 with someone my age who simply struggled socially and felt like our time together online was his ‘happy place’. What I have learned from my personal situations and people who often date online is this: Online relationships are usually more of an escape route and less of a realistic, solid, futuristic experience. Many people who throw themselves into online relationships are avoiding resolving issues that dominate their life. Their intent may not always be harmful but it's certainly not a good investment of your youth either. Really absorb this message and understand that you should absolutely not let yourself get so attached to a stranger without truly knowing

    • what place his heart is in and whether his intentions are good or bad for you.

What Guys Said 3

  • honestly I think you'll have to meet him in person. I mean I guess its possible to do it online but it sounds like a super challenge. and it must be hard for partners to come closer together if they live in 2 different countries. don't take his word for anything unless you feel comfortable & confident in him without actually seeing him.

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    • Yea, our only means of communication is chat and video call.

  • Only time will show that. I don't think he believes that himself without first meeting you in person.

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  • you will ALWAYS know if someone is serious by their actions... words are cheap.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Deleting a profile doesn't necessarily mean that he is serious about you, per say. The only way you would know is if he is very attentive (depending on his schooling & job), interested in what you're doing, willing to come and see you, and just try his best to get to know you in and out. Not trying to be negative, but it's so easy to create a new free profile and account, without anyone knowing. It all boils down to how he treats you.
    What else has he done besides delete his profile?

    Ok, good luck.:)

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    • Well thats true, it is easy to create a new profile without me knowing. We only chat/video call 30-1hr per day, thats because he is in military and im a nurse, were both pretty busy plus the time difference really sucks. We haven't discussed anything serious yet except for family issues. But before i get all serious with him i just wanna know other people opinion. You see i kinda suck with relationships, i have been single for 7 years bec. I had a hard time letting go of my ex.

  • I think something is wrong, if he deletes his profile because he "wants to focus all of his time on you". Wow romantic, but COME ON! I mean, have you even met each other?

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  • Give him the lie detector test

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  • I don't know if he is. Give it a try, maybe he is sincere

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