Girlfriend had coffee with her ex. Should I be worried?

My girlfriend had coffee with an ex the other day. She told me about it. But I said that it made me a little uncomfortable. She replied that he was halving a hard time and needed a friend. It has media me a little upset. Should I be upset or worried?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • It can simply be because she is a kind person who is really trying to help a friend. However to be honest with you i find this a bit strange myself. I can understand a women helping a friend but a women having coffee with her ex can turn some heads. If it bothers you she should respect that and avoid these interactions, explain to her how ex's are different than friends. There are always old feelings that both people remember perfectly when with each other. It is these old feeling that stir up and lead to things. This does not make you insecure, you have the right as her partner to feel bother when a person she shared emotions with comes into the picture. Think about it like this, if you and her weren't together and had coffee would you remember the times you were with her? Possibly even share inside jokes only the two of you made? Explain it to her just like that so she can have a better understanding towards how you feel. If this is a onetime thing let it go, if you see happen too often than speak up on it for the sake of your own health. Stressing and worrying can affect you in many ways and as your partner she should care more about your health than she cared about her ex's hard time.

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    • Thanks for taking the time with my question your answer is really helpful

    • Np bro im glad i could help best of luck with your situation. x)

What Girls Said 17

  • It doesn't mean she's cheating, but I'd be pissed. People who associate with exes are a deal breaker for me.

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  • Definitely. not okay, not insecurity at all. It's a respect thing, and i see that as disrespecting you. I would not like it if my bf did that to me. If that was the case why not invite you with.

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  • You would be worried if she did not tell this to you. She told you because she felt comfortable. She is a nice person who tries to help her friend.

    Don't get upset. There is really nothing to be worried about.

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  • You have a right to be upset. They broke up for a reason, they just werent compatible therefore they shouldn't be friends. The ex is bullshit he just wants her back. Bet that. Besides im almost positive she wouldn't be okay with the thought of you having coffee with your ex.

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    • We'll she says the reason they broke up is because they where more friends and didint think the relationship was going anywhere

  • talk to her about it. its perfectly normal to get upset, this coming from a naturally jealous person. however, dont say "youre never allowe to see him again" or "you cant talk to any other guys" however a good approach would be something alon the lines of "that made me uncomfortable " that simple

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  • I'd be worried. I wouldn't like it.

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  • No, if you trust her then nothing to worry about! I like to meet my exes to catch up and my boyfriend is fine with it. All about trust! If you're worried just talk to her about it.

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  • No. Not until you have reason to think it was more than two friends getting together for coffee. You know her and you'll be able to tell if something's not right

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  • I think that if she told you about it then she's not hiding anything. Ask her if she's okay and wants to talk about anything if she's feeling lonely?

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  • Are you gay

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  • Be their she just sounds like she's a really nice lady. And to me it sounded like there relationship ended on good terms.

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  • If u trust her then no

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  • Yessssssssss!

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  • I wouldn't worry too much, but don't let your guard down. He may be going through a rough time and doesn't know who to turn to, but still keep an eye on him. Good luck!

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  • I don't think you should be worried, it might be something personal that he knows about that she need to talk about.

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  • Do you trust your girl? If you do, then let it go. Most likely you have nothing to worry about. He's her ex for a reason.

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  • She'll call you overly-possessive if you keep questioning her about her ex. Why does she have to depend on her ex during hard times? Are you not always there for her? If you guys really like each other, trust her. She will not cheat on you. Make yourself more approachable so that she doesn't have to depend on her ex.

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    • No he needed a friend. I really haven't asked a lot about it I have always been there for her and love her a lot. I'm just not used to a girlfriend that sees her EXs and it sort of makes me uncomfortable

What Guys Said 8

  • She can have sex with him for all I care as long as she's going to tell me and end of the day she's with me. Well if she's not going to be there then guess we were never meant to be - that's how I take it :) Insecurity isn't my forte :) ;)

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  • Let her know about your discomfort... but I wouldn't worry at this moment.

    Just communicate your feelings.

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  • You need to be strong and not be insecure about it. But that crap about her ex having a hard time is such bull. Guys do that crap all the time just to get the attention. be calm and talk to her about it communicate

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    • Right. and I am not as much worried about her. It's him I'm worried about

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    • I'm not usually insecure about things. When she told me that they where going to get coffee I wasn't worried at all but then I started thinking and I have a vivid imagination so now it's been bugging
      Me and I trust her fully and a told her I want to meet him so we will see what kind of guy he is. And I'm the type who is pretty protective which she likes.

    • Well if you trust her, then I see no reason why this is even a question. This question shows that you have doubt in her. saying it like it is

  • Fuck that! go hit up an ex gf and take her on a date and say "she was feeling depressed so we got dinner!"

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  • Dump that bitch.

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  • She's fucking him. Plan and simple.

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  • Both. Any answers that say "it's fine blah blah" are na├»ve. Beware this is just the beginning. I don't want anyone hurt but come back to this question in 6 months and I bet you two will be finished.

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  • I consider that date between your girlfriend and her ex. In fact I'd just cut off all contact with her from here on out.

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