Girls have told me I'm hot, and funny. Yet Why do I still have low self confidence and struggle with dating?

Throughout my life I've been complimented on my good looks along with my funny jokes and personality. Some women have even told me I resemble Leonardo DiCaprio. But unfortunately I have really struggled with flirting with girls and taking the few dates I had to the next level. I don't know if I subconsciously tell myself that these statements are lies or I just don't believe them.

The human mind is a complex thing; we all have one. And we all have our own problems and insecurities. But I can't figure out why these positive reinforcers don't make me better at the dating game.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I go through the same thing. I was bullied A LOT and actually called ugly by lots of guys. not a good feeling. but now that im out of highschool I found out because they were jealous and were bullied so they wanted to hurt someone weaker. but since then a lot of people had said im pretty and cute. but now bc so many guys have called me ugly looking in the mirror I've convinced myself that I am ugly from all these other times. now its hard for me too believe im not. kinda just have to somehow re wire your brain into not thinking it. im not sure how though

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    • That could be the case too. Everyone gets bullied and picked on at least once in their lives, and the affects can be everlasting. Negative statements often have stronger impacts than positive compliments. I think it helps to find that special someone to remind you how beautiful you are every day.

    • I agree. I found a guy online. he's now a really good friend of mine. everytime he talks he tells me im beautiful. I still don't believe him but he still does this. but my concept of myself is getting better. im slowly starting to see what he sees. it takes time when you've been called ugly so much. like you said 1 person saying something negative to me throws me completely down. but I could get 10 compliments and not believe it. its almost just needing to accept the fact your beautiful. now there are some girls who just say oh im not beautiful for attention. but for me its because I don't feel like I am. and im trying to change that. bc us as humans see all the little flaws in ourselves. like I have my eczema and think its gross. he thinks its just a part of me and doesn't judge. maybe you have a tooth that's a bit crooked for example or you think your nose is to big whatever little flaws you may see in yourself. these things are so small that most people don't even notice.

What Girls Said 2

  • I go through the same thing, I have a boyfriend who always complimenting me and I still have no confidence.
    Look up body dysmorphic disorder,

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  • Is that your real picture? O-O

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    • Haha yeah. This used to be the anonymous male icon before the website redesigned. I added my face :D

    • I now. It was sarcastic remark
      Perhaps you have trust issues

What Guys Said 3

  • Story of my life

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  • I know exactly how you feel. Exactly

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  • Just be more flirty with them!

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