Clinginess: Is it cute or annoying? (Men and woman)

I'm talking about both genders. Personally I'd love a clingy girl because I'd feel loved a lot. I know a lot of guys needs their space but no, I'd rather be with a girl I loved 24/7.

Sucks for me because I tend to be clingy which I hear is a huge turnoff but I discussed it with my girlfriend and she said she actually likes it because she shares my opinion (shows love).

How are you all on this topic?

Updates:
After seeing the first response it makes me want to ask: what does it mean to be clingy?

I rarely see my girlfriend but when I do I don't want to leave her alone. I just want to cuddle and kiss the whole time. Is that a bit much?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I definitely agree you need to think what is clingy? because some people are just very affectionate, i am and i've had guys who are like "Your so clingy" because they listen to other people who also listen to other people too and have created this label that any sort of affection is some how "clingy", how even showing any form of affection is some how something to be ashamed about these days... it's not... embrace it because life is short, fit in all the lovin' and affection you possibly can, let love in because most people only have 1 true love in their life.

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    • Of course if someone gets completely controlling and paranoisd and gives you no space to yourself and just constantly wants to be with you every day and night that's when it's clingy, but don't mistake affection for clingyness.

    • Your definitely not being clingy ether as you said you rarely get to see your girlfriend, don't let other people make you feel ashamed of showing affection to her, there is actually no real definition of how much love to do unless it gets borderline controlling but anything else people should be thank ful for and especially when you rarely see your gf i think all the lovin' is needed lol :P.

What Girls Said 6

  • It depends on the level of clingyness. AND if you're dating them or not. I had someone who refused to stop texting me 8am to 11pm everyday. He always wanted to hang out, and if I was busy - he'd text me at least 6 times in a row making sure I wasn't pissed off at him for something. He told me I wasn't allowed to talk or hang out with any other guy, because I was talking to him. The catch? I wasn't dating this guy. THAT is too clingy, which in turn makes it downright annoying. People need their space sometimes.

    But, like you described - being around your significant other and like cuddling and kissing the whole time you're with them - I wouldn't consider *that* to be overly clingy. That's cute clingy :)

    The whole "together couple lovey dovey stuff" is okay - it's the texting every 10 minutes to see where you're at now in your house, is when it turns into something ugly.

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  • Really annoying and childish

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  • I see my boyfriend everyday, when im not with him; im texting him.
    I LOVED the attention at the beginning, but 1 year and 6 months later, its kind of starting to get boring.

    If you dont see her a lot then its not being clingy, due to the fact you want to be next to her as much as possible. It just shows how much you love her <3

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  • Annoying. I dated a clingy guy and it literally drove me away. I also am independent and want my autonomy so this could be a contributing factor.

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  • If a guy texts me every hour and acts like I'm his mother, it gets annoying.

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  • Annoying to me, but I am especially independent.

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What Guys Said 6

  • It starts out cute and gets old REALLY fast! I've had 2 clingy girlfriends. First clingy one I somehow survived without feeling too crazy. The second one was nuts. She would ramble on the phone for 20+ minutes at a time and yell at me that I was "interrupting" her any time I'd try to speak. She'd also get annoyed if I wouldn't see her the next day when we already hung out for hours the night before and then she'd demand that I'd sleep over the next night on top of that. She was way too sensitive and while being sensitive sounds feminine and all, it is a huge problem in relationships. When sensitive girls get offended (which will be at things you may not have even said) they'll twist everything to be your fault and find ways to psychologically fuck your head up until you're trapped in their insanity and you'll end up the bad guy without saying a word.

    I literally could not afford to see her as much as she wanted and we literally spent like 1+ hours a day on the phone alone, which was mostly her rambling.

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  • I'm a clingy guy and my girlfriend is a clingy girl. I know they say opposites attract but when it comes to things like that, it's great to have that in common! We both know when we want space but we also love talking to each other all the time and being in each other's company. Generally, being clingy would be a turnoff to a girl. But I guess if she's that type too then it works out for both of you. I'm the same way though. Someone being clingy shows that they love you but you also need space every now and then.

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  • I like my space, I don't mind if a girl shows her love but none of that update on where I am or what I'm doing stuff.

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  • Annoying lol
    please don't:D

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  • It's a total downer, totally. I am independent person, and thought of being smothered to validate someone's insecurities is a bit much. I would rather be single than deal.

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  • I can't stand clingy girls. I have a buddy who is similar to you in that he likes clingy girls because it makes him feel wanted, special, loved, etc. Don't take this as a personal insult, but seeing my friend like this is a very poor and fake way of feeling wanted. It's not desire, it's necessity. He usually pairs up with people similar to him (which is another similarity to your situation), but with this clinginess comes other issues that just doesn't need to be put up with.

    I wouldn't like the feeling of being dependent on someone else for my happiness and feeling of worth, as I much prefer to have the power over that myself. And I begin to feel smothered and stressed if a girl is too clingy or desperate for my attention. I'm not the sole reason that another person exists, so it's a lot of unnecessary pressure to feel like I'm the one who makes a person either very happy or depressed.

    And I don't think it's the clinginess alone that turns me off from a girl like that. As I mentioned above, the girls or guys I've met who were clingy people also had other issues that they left unaddressed as well. So with the clinginess comes other (possibly big) insecurities that just doesn't interest me.

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    • You're definitely right as far as bigger issues being hidden behind clinginess, whether it be trust issues, insane insecurity, and stuff of that nature.

      As far as everything else you stated- fair enough. Everyone's different and that's cool. I like the idea of dating a cute, clingy girl because I feel like I'm making a difference in someone's life. I could date some hot girl who is perfect and faithful but it's just not the same.

      Anyways thanks for the long, detailed comment, very helpful!

    • Firstly, yes it's nice that we can recognize that we agree to disagree. No harm done and no need to get hostile over it lol.

      With that being said, do you see a difference in a "cute girl" vs. "hot girl"? And do you assume one is a certain way, while the other is usually different?

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