Is it possible to surrender all emotions?

I'm so fed up with my life, and with people! I'm just so full of anger, and sadness, and rage that it's maddening. I've been miserable all my life, and, you know what, I don't want to be, not anymore. I don't want to feel anything at all, I want to be a machine. See, it was bad enough that no one spoke to me since summer began, then that my friend was a jerk out to make my depression even worse, but now this girl I just met basically lead me on and made an idiot out of me. I'm just so sick of this, and the fact that my depression was getting better proves it never gets better! I'm so angry, I thought I was attractive, but apparently not because everyone rejects me!!! I don't even know why girls reject me, am I ugly, is it because I'm black, why? I'm so bitter, and angry, and sad, and vengeful!!! I just want to know how to stop feeling, I don't want anymore emotions, I just want them all gone, my suffering didn't help me appreciate the "good things in life" it only helped me hate them when they turned on me and left. I will never get over this. Girls have destroyed my confidence at this point, and everyone destroyed my ability to find any joy in life, so I need to stop feeling, I'd even hurt myself, give myself brain damage if I have to, all I want is to escape my suffering, I'll do anything to do so.

Updates:
I'm so sick of everything, I'm so much more than everyone else, I'm one of the few people that tries to be good, I'm so much more, so why should I suffer every waking moment of my life?
Know what, I don't even care if this is self-pity, with all the crap I've been through, I'd have to be a machine to not be screwed up by now.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Hey. Hey, relax yourself. Okay. Everything will be better. Just get a room for yourself and I know everything will be alright, It's okay to surrender all emotions but temporarily. Maybe you can't handle yourself being rejected. Maybe that leads you to frustration and depression and all of those negative vibes. All you need to do is learn to handle it. I mean, learn to move on once you feel rejected. Everything is all about HANDLING emotions: how to use, how to control, how to put it in place, who to apply it--everything!

    So, take a deep breath and know yourself. :D That's all you can do.

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    • How so, if I handled my emotions that wouldn't fix anything, I'd still get rejected, I'd still get used by people.

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    • If there's only misery in the future, how can I be? I wantes to take medication to suppress my emotions, but my parents won't let me, because they think I might get "addicted".

    • You can take if there's prescription by your psychologist or doctors or whoever you meet in the medical field. Yes, talk to your parents about your problem. Gosh maybe they can help you and let you understand.

What Girls Said 2

  • You can't just stop feeling emotions. You have to accept them. There is so much in life to be grateful and happy about. You just have to change the way you look at things. You're still young. Don't give up already. Things will get better, it might not seem like they will at the moment but they will eventually.

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  • Hey relax! I don't have depression but I know what you're dealing with is hard.

    So one girl doesn't like you. That doesn't mean you're hideous too ALL women.

    Jerky friend? Dump him. Find better friends.

    All your other problems are resolvable.

    I think taking up mediation would be a good idea for you. You can calm your mind down until you know how to deal with everything. And definitely seek help if you haven't already.

    It will be okay :)

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    • My parents won't let me take medication, and my therapist never prescribed any, and it's not one girl, it's every girl I've ever talked to! And that "friend" knows too much about me for me to dump him, because he might tell people.

    • So? Every guy I have ever talked to hasn't reciprocated anything. Rejection is a part of life. We have ALL had bad friends- I lost 7 of my friends right before college due to some nasty stupid drama. I just let them go and made some better friends.

      It wasn't easy but it sure is better than being lonely!

      I still think meditation is a good idea. And talk to your parents about medication- maybe there is a less risky alternative. Also maybe you might want to find a different therapist.

      I've been through therapy before and I hated it the first time because she didn't understand me well and trivialized my problems. The second time we connected quite well though and I found it to be very helpful.

What Guys Said 4

  • to free yourself of emotion you can learn the ways of The Shaolin Monks. Meditate in their ways, live life through the spirit of martial art. You may discover true enlightenment and obtain blissful peace.

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  • Apathy is what you apparently want, but I doubt there is anyway to voluntarily just go into a permanent state of it, unless you want to get a lobotomy. Or of course you could just kill yourself, because I don't think you'd feel much at all then. So basically death or extenssive damage to brain tissue if you want to force yourself into a permanent state of indifference.

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  • Ah teenagers.

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  • You can't make your emotions go away, you can only learn to handle them better.

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