I met this guy online, we’ve been on 3 dates in two weeks (two sleepovers and texting/phone calls every day, mostly his initiative). He was very careful asking me out, getting physical etc at the beginning and even joked about being terrified of “screwing it up” – so I assumed he put me in the girlfriend potential category. I've also very casually met his friends, but that wasn't really planned.
At first, I thought he was a player because he has a LOT of pretty female friends on FB, seemed very “smooth” and was secretive about his phone. I’ve teased him about sleeping around and he says that he’s a nice guy and hasn’t really had many one night stands – instead, he’s dated girls and it hasn’t turned into anything serious (which doesn’t really make me feel any better.) He hasn’t had a girlfriend in 4 years (he’s 25).
I decided I would “play” him back by telling him about others I’ve dated, other “prospects” I have, taking a while to answer texts when I was out etc – which seemed to work because at one point, in a text, he said “I’m not the one who’s dating others...” I reassured him that that wasn’t my style.
I want to take it slow to avoid a “friends with benefits” relationship. On the second sleepover (3rd date), I let him go down on me (I didn’t let anything happen besides kissing before that). Now I regret it, because he is acting more sexual towards me – and putting less effort into getting to know me at a personal level, like before.
How do I avoid this from becoming FOB? Do I all of a sudden stop sleeping over? Sleep over and not sleep with him? How do I put myself back in the GF category?
Most Helpful Guy
Sex does not disclose you from the girlfriend category. It's very simple, if a guy ONLY care about sex when you talk, then you as a person simply do not interest him.
And if a guy says "I'm not the one dating other people" that is NOT a sign it is working. That is a sign he is frustrated and wondering why he is putting in the effort, which might be a reason why he is putting in less now.0
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