Ok.. here goes. My girlfriend has had a "friend" way before I met her. He's been the "sweetest", "nicest", "caring" guy ever.. he's been there for her for a lot. But even when she was with her ex, he would call, text, and hang out with her. Which crossed the line with her ex and pretty much caused fights, and arguments between her and her ex. Her ex ended up threatening to him and he stopped for a while. Once she broke up with her ex, he confessed to her that he "loved" her and wanted a bit more with her. SHe let him know there was no chance of them being together but he stayed around, taking her places and buying her gifts all the time.
Then I came into the picture, at first it bugged me that he would invite her to go out places and visit her at work or school. I let her know how I felt and it was difficult but finally she understood that it was wrong for her to be hanging out with a guy that had other intentions with her. Finally around Christmas.. he ended up calling her and meeting up with her to give her a really expensive purse..as a gift.. which p*ssed me off! not only because he continued to cross the line,but I had also gotten her an expensive purse for Christmas so it was almost as though I was competing for my own gf. It took some time for me to get it through her head that what he was doing was disrespectful...
I didn't want to make her end her friendship with anyone..but the fact that he kept doing things like this, I just didn't see any other way...now a couple of months have passed by that he's contacted her...
and now my girlfriend told me that he has started texting her again.. and tried calling her..
what do I do..? My first instinct is to go where he works and beat him down with a bat.. but maybe there's other things I should try 1st..
Do I need to step in and do it for her? and If I do.. there's a good chance he'll end up in a hospital.. =/
Most Helpful Guy
Well I had this same problem and what I did worked.
1. I had a conversation with my girlfriend. I told her how it bothered me and how I did not like the situation. I then asked her how she felt and how we could best resolve the problem.
2. With her blessing I clearly explained to him that he was making me uncomefortable and and that my girlfriend and I had agreed that it was best he move on. (This polite suggestion did not work, the texts and phone calls and e-mails kept coming.)
3. I showed up to his house and bashed the f*** out of him with a brick to the face. With my boot firmly on his throat I explained that if I had to come back here again, my next visit will get real f***ing ugly.
I no longer have this problem and we are in a very happy relationship.
Bottom line. Talk to your woman first and work it out. Find a resolve. Next try diplomacy and be polite. If that doesn't work...Kick his f***ing head in. Some people confuse kindness for weakness. Never let someone try to take what's yours and make you look like an asshole in the process. - j1