Is my arab/Muslim bf not taking me seriously? Confused help?

My bf is arab/Muslim and I'm Mexican American/ catholic. We've known each other for about a year but started dating a couple months ago, everything was going fine until I noticed that he never posts anything about me on social networks.. It's like I don't exist! None of his family knows about me, besides some close cousins but that's pretty much it. I don't know why it seems like I'm such a secret! If he was serious I about me he wouldn't care right? Sometimes I start thinking that maybe in wasting my time, and I don't want to get hurt.


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What Guys Said 2

  • m 57... very, very many possible issues here... A lot of this will depend on how deeply ingrained your two cultures are in you.
    Him hiding you is probably cultural racism, i. e. he being Arabic, doesn't want people to know he dates a Mex/American. Could be religious prejudice too. I don't how staunch Muslim families are about accepting people of other faiths or not, but in general nothing in the world causes so much debate as religion.

    Again, a lot depends on how deep the culture runs. Muslim societies often place strict controls on women... controls on dress, behavior and even upward mobility. Catholics tend to tolerate things, like drinking alcohol, that i'm pretty sure all Muslim societies prohibit. Perhaps his family would find you a bit more of a libertine than they can tolerate.

    Now please don't take this personally... I'm more or less shooting in the dark here...

    There is a paradigm where a moralistic culture will closely adhere to and demand conformity to community standards of behavior. The men, being of this culture, have to go along. Sometimes however another culture will settle close by, with women who are able to be a bit more sexual. What happens is the male population of the more moralistic community will enter into secretive relationships with the women of the looser culture, in effect keeping themselves a 'dirty little whore' on the side. Where it becomes harmful is that in engaging in commerce the two cultures might have to interact, at which time the moralistic men band together on the side of their own community and appear to 'look down' on these women.

    Wish i had more... hope this gives you some kind of framework.

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  • I'm Arab/Muslim. And most Arab families look down on dating, it's just tradition and culture. So he's probably not ready to deal with the drama his family will lay down on his head.

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    • But if you really like someone it shouldn't matter. It's not like I'm some hooked or anything hahah dating is normal we are in the 21st century hahah

    • Hooker*

    • Exactly, but his parents probably see it waaaayy different.

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