I am about to be in an awkward situation, how should I handle it?

My bf's mother passed away yesterday after being in a diabetic coma for two days. Him and I have been seeing each other for 7 years. He has a daughter that comes to my house on the weekends with him. The thing is, I have never met her mom. We are different races and she totally hates me because I am white. She is always texting him calling me white bitch this and white ho that. This woman has never said one word to me. She saw me once two years ago sitting in a car. What makes it even worse is the fact that his mother was a very conniving, sneaky back stabbing trouble maker who caused chaos in everyone she has ever known lives. She has put so much crap about me into his daughter's mothers head and I am not close to any of his family. I have never been to their house or anything because they don't like the fact that I am white. Anyways to sum it all up, He wants me to go to his aunts home with him Thursday for a memorial for his mother. The thing is, I hate to be fake. He has told me things that his cousins have said like telling him he gave up on his culture to be with me, calling him a sell out. Put that with the fact that I hated his mom and she hated me and I am like I don't really want to go to a house full of people who know nothing about me other than the fact that I am a different race. I feel that if his daughter's mom even looks at me funny I will want to slap her face off. I want to support him in every way but at the same time, if I feel people are treating me bad or talking about me there I will be on my own defending myself because I'm not the type to just sit there and play like I'm clueless and let it go on. He was with his daughter's mom for 8 years so they all know her and not one of them know me so I feel very weird about going. If his daughter's mom trys to be polite and say Hi or something, I am liable to say ''well it's nice to finally put a face to the bitch who does all the name calling''.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You are there to be supportive of your boyfriend and to help him through the grieving process of him losing his mom. You suck it up and act nice. You will only look like an asshole if you don't.

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What Guys Said 1

  • I know the feeling I've been put in similar situations but the emportin thing to remember is that your there to saport him and not his family. That being said sometimes you have to be the bigger person and not stoop other people leavels. If they talk shit about you just icknor them and just pretend like it's just the two of you in the room together. Cause believe me I have a extremely judgmental family and it's not going to be easy on him either. Just remember that there is possible a brighter side to all this too and that is his family doesn't know they only think they know about you. So if you walk in there with your head held high and show saport to your man by paying your respects to a woman they know who you hate. It might just change there minds and maybe give you second chance at getting to know them as well them getting to know you. It's like walking into a lions den and not showing fear some of them might attack you and some of them might leave you alone. Only in your case it's not about fear it's about respect for you, you're man, and his family. So some of them well probably still talk shit out of jealousy like the ex girlfriend but the cousins, aunts, uncle, brother, sister, and who ever matters might think twice about after that. But if they don't then there's nothing lost cause you already don't talk to them

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What Girls Said 1

  • I agree with yaddayaddayadda02... maybe have a drink of wine before hand to take the edge off, but nothing more. Present your best self and maybe others there might have get an idea why he loves you so much.

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